He Never Cries
by SouthernHemmy
Summary: This is a first for me! Finn and Puck. I dont know where the relationship is going yet, but I had to write it after the pics of them in NYC. The chemistry is there. So please read, review if you want. The rating will go up later. And I love Puck angst!
1. Chapter 1

_Just woke up with this in my head and well here we go…So please be patient and maybe it will come together…And yes I am working on "What did you do?"…My love to ValBabe-You know who you are! _

_Anywho, I am going for something different in this fic…I swore I would never do a fic like this but here I am writing it...I put part of the blame on the pics I saw from the Nationals shoot in NYC...The chemistry between Cory and Mark was there, off camera…Review please…Hemmy_

**He Never Cries**

The party is beginning to die down as he walks up the stairs looking for his ride. It is getting late and his mom would be worried if he wasn't home soon. The buzz he had earlier was beginning to dissipate from his brain. He checks the bathroom first, making sure his ride wasn't in there puking his guts out. The next door leads to a couple making out and obscenities being hurled at him for disturbing them. He did get to see a little boob action though. The next door is the same. The last door he opens is empty or at least he thought it was until he heard the whimpering sound from the other side of the dark room.

Taking long strides around the bed, the curtains let in enough light to see the shape laying on the floor against the wall. The figure has his knees drawn up to his chest with his arms wrapped around them. He can hear the muffled sobs, see his friend's body shake with each breath. Terror fills his mind, seeing his friend crumbling alone in the dark. _He never cries…_

He walks over squatting down on his knees, pulling the other teenager against him. Arms reaching up wrap around his neck and he can feel the hot tears slipping down his neck to the collar of his shirt. He has no idea what is wrong, but he knows that something bad has happened tonight. His own body shaking from the fear that grips him. "What happened in here? You have to talk to me!" The only response he gets is more broken sobbing from his best friend.

He tries to pull the other teenager up to his feet, but stops when he hears the muffled pain filled groan, "please stop, it hurts too much." He stops, but he pulls the body against his lap, just holding him. "Who did this to you?"

"_Get me out of here, please_." The voice is cracked and strained from emotion. "_Just want to go home...__**Please**_**!**"

He thinks for a minute, trying to figure out how to get his devastated friend out of the house. The back door is off of the kitchen, if he can just make it down the stairs and through the kitchen without any trouble from anyone, then he can make it to his car. He can just tell everyone that he is carrying him out because he passed out, he is too drunk to walk on his own.

He wraps his arms around the shuddering body, lifting him up into his arms like a small child. He tells the young man in his arms to try and be quiet as they exit the house. He waits until the sobs subside, he steps out of the bedroom. The weight is not unbearable and he begins the descent down the stairs from the landing. The party downstairs is over and he notices that there are not that many people left as he heads through the kitchen to make it to the back door.

"Is he alright?" Santana looks at both guys pointing her finger at the one being carried out.

"Yeah, he just got a little too wasted tonight. I'm going to take him home and let him sleep it off." The teen hopes she believes him.

"You could just leave him here and let him sleep it off. It's not like I'm gonna try and molest him in his sleep." Santana is concerned when she sees the other jock's grip tighten and starts shaking his head no at her words. _What the hell?_

"No that's alright. I'm just gonna take him home, to my house. We were going to spend tomorrow playing Halo 2 and just chilling in my room." He makes his way to the back door, he tightens his arms around the jock in his arms letting him know that he's got him.

They make it out of the house without further incident and after getting the distraught and struggling teen buckled in, he leaves Santana's driveway headed to his own home. He watches his friend out of the corner of his eye, the whimpers that escape chewed lips, the sick painful groans that happen every time he hit's a bump in the road. "We are almost home dude. Almost home." He speaks the words like a mantra over and over trying to reassure his best friend and himself.

Santana walks around the house thinking about the odd pair. Finn was literally cradling Puck like a little kid in his arms. The way Puck reacted to her words bothered her. Puckerman was always more than willing to jump her bones when she was in the mood, so why did he act all freaked out. _Just doesn't make sense_.

Santana smiles at the site in front of her. She finds Dave Karofsky in the living room. He is picking up garbage and throwing it away. Ever since she had found out his secret they had become more than friend-enemies. They had several conversations about who and what they were, how the world would never accept them. In that they had found kindred spirits in each other.

"I saw the strangest thing tonight. Finn was carrying Puck out to his car." Santana muses out loud as she helps pick up the empty plastic cups and other garbage.

"Really, why is that strange? I mean Puckerman was probably drunk off his ass and Finn was just being Finn." Dave looks at Santana not understanding where she is going with this. "What else could it be?"

"Puck can handle his liquor better than anyone who was here tonight. So I don't think that was it. I told Finn to leave him here, let him sleep it off. I made a joke about not raping him and he sort of freaked out in Finn's arms. It was like he got scared all of a sudden." Santana suddenly remembers that they came down the stairs and she runs to the second landing, with Dave following behind her.

"What the hell San?"

"You look in those rooms", Santana points to the right, "and I will take the bathroom and these two."

"What are we looking for?" Dave is getting frustrated, he has no clue what Santana is up to, but he opens the first door anyway.

"I don't know. Just see if you can tell which room they were in before I saw them come down stairs." Santana looks around the bathroom, other than being out of toilet paper for the fifth time nothing looked unusual. She moved to the next room.

"Um Santana I think I found something. I don't know if it was them but there is a mess in this room." Dave's face is contorted in disgust.

"What the hell! I'm going to kick some little bitch's ass for bleeding on my mom's new linens. What the fuck? Couldn't they stop long enough to go and get a towel?" Santana is ranting about the bloody comforter on the bed. She is thinking that some little twit was on the rag while fucking her boyfriend.

"Uh, San….I don't think it was some chick in here." Dave is holding up Puck's letterman jacket. It was laying on the floor beside the bed.

"Oh my God! What the fuck happened in here? Dave?" Santana takes the jacket from Dave's hands, looking to the bed at the blood stain. She pulls the jacket against her chest.

"I don't know. Was he bleeding when you saw him? Was his face busted up? Like from a fight?" Dave looks at the shape and size of the stain.

"No, but his face was buried in Finn's neck so I really didn't get to see it clearly. I'm going to go call Finn and see what the hell he knows about this shit." Santana takes off to find her cell phone.

Dave spots something on the floor almost under the bed. He picks it up and knows who it belongs to. He can feel anger wash over him as his mind puts together a scenario that makes him want to kill someone. He puts the offending object in his pocket before Santana can see it. He knows the Latina will kill the owner if his thoughts are correct. He walks down to the kitchen listening to her swear in Spanish about Finn's balls and earrings. He knows those words cause she has screamed them at him before. He watches her grab her keys and latch on to his arm.

"Come on! We are going to Finn's and find out what the fuck is going on! Damn asshole won't answer his phone!" Santana screeches as she drags Dave out the back door to her car.


	2. Not Alone

**Warning! This chapter is somewhat graphic! If this could offend you then please do not read! Hemmy**

Chapter 2

Finn is surprised that police sirens can't be heard in the distance. Puck had begged and screamed when Finn got him out of the truck. After several minutes of arguing and yelling he was now carrying Puck in the house. _At least he wasn't carrying a body out of the house. _

"I just want to go home! Finn, please take me home! Don't want to see anyone!" Puck is almost screaming the words at Finn. He doesn't want anyone to know what happened to him that would make it real. His body is screaming, each step taken by Finn rips up his spine. He can't stop the whimpers that escape his bloodied lips.

"You are staying here tonight Puck! I am not leaving you alone!" Finn yells at his best friend. He didn't understand what happened to Puck but he understood enough to know that Puck needed him whether Puck knew that or not. "Burt and Mom are gone to a convention until next week. Kurt didn't come home this weekend, so no one is home. It's just you and me."

Finn keeps telling Puck that they are the only ones in the house. He takes Puck upstairs to his bedroom and gently lays him on the bed. Finn watches as Puck rolls to his side curling his knees up to his chest; he just stares at the wall.

Finn starts to take his letterman jacket off when he notices the blood spots on the bottom part of his jacket. He looks at his Levis and finds more blood. Looking at his best friend curling up; he feels like a pervert but he inspects Puck's clothes for blood. He finds it. _Oh my God!_

Finn steps toward Puck, his hand outstretched, reaching for Puck's backside. He stops when he hears Santana's voice. He watches Puck's body start shaking, "make her go away Finn!" Finn rubs Puck's shoulder telling him he will be right back. Finn walks out of the room and back downstairs.

"What the hell Santana? What do you want?" Finn stares at the dark Latina standing in the kitchen and then he sees another figure. "Dave? Why are you both here?"

"Where is he Finn? Where is Puck? What the hell happened to him? What the fuck did you do to him?" Santana is screaming at Finn, her fists balled up ready to start beating the hell out of him. "If you hurt him I swear to God I will rip your dick off and shove it down the garbage disposal!"

"I didn't do anything to Puck! I found him upstairs at _your_ house! He was crying Santana! Puck never cries! He's hurt! I don't know what happened or who did it! But it's bad!" Finn yells back at her. He is scared after seeing where the blood was coming from on Puck's body.

"Could the two of you stop screaming at each other? This isn't helping Puck! Where is he Finn?" Dave tries to gain control of the two frightened teens. He is scared himself, he knows, deep down inside, he knows what happened to Puck. And he knows who did it.

"He's upstairs in my bedroom. He doesn't want to see anyone. He won't tell me anything. He just keeps holding himself. I have never seen Puck afraid of anything, but he is scared out of his mind right now." Finn looks at Dave and Santana with tears in his eyes. He doesn't know how to help his best friend; he doesn't know what to do for him.

Dave turns Santana around to face him before he speaks directly to her.

"San you need to calm down. You are not going to help him if you go up there screaming at him or at us. I think he was raped tonight. And if I am right he needs for all of us to be calm, to take care of him. He needs to go to the hospital and be examined by a doctor. Something could be torn inside of him."

Santana shoves one of her balled up fists in her mouth when Dave says the word raped to stifle the scream that is threatening to rip from her soft lips. _Guys don't get raped, not guys like Puck anyway. He is too strong, too big for some guy to do that to him. _

Finn knows what Dave is saying is true. "He doesn't want to see anyone Dave. He told me to make Santana go away. I don't know what to do."

The terror filled screams from upstairs brings Finn's words to a stop. Santana is the first to break into a run at the stairs with Dave and Finn following behind her. All three teens, their faces ghostly white have no idea what they will do when they reach Puck.

_**Puck is laying on Finn's bed the assault playing out in his mind again**_.

He had gone to pass out; he knew he drank way too much. He had already given his keys to Finn when they arrived at the party. He found the one empty bedroom and just fell across the bed face first. He doesn't know how long he laid there oblivious to the world around him before he felt white hot pain beyond belief flowing from his ass up his spine.

He can't lift his head off the comforter. He opens his mouth but nothing comes out, his throat is closed up tight. His arms and legs won't obey any commands his mind sends to them. Puck can feel something warm and sticky running down between his legs. His mind won't let him focus on what it is; all he can focus on is the pain. Panic and terror have frozen Puck's body completely.

He can still hear the words being spoken in his ear with each tearing thrust into his unprepared hole. "Gonna make you pay for everything! Not so tough now are you Puckerman? How does it feel to be the bitch? My bitch! To know you deserve this!" The voice keeps taunting him as the thrusts are faster and harder, finger nails are being dug into his skin leaving red trails on his sides and hips.

Puck doesn't remember when it stopped or that it was over until he heard Finn come into the room. He doesn't remember pulling his jeans back up or falling off the bed to crawl into the corner. He doesn't see hear the trio rush in to Finn's room.

Finn, Dave, and Santana watch in horror as Puck crawls to the corner of the room. His eyes are wide open but he is not seeing them, he has stopped screaming but is now sobbing. Puck is lost in the nightmare. Finn is the one to go to Puck pulling the terrified teen into his arms. Santana turns into Dave's body stifling her own sob in his shirt. Dave holds her close all the while watching the gentle ministrations of Finn to Puck.

Finn picks Puck up off the floor and lays him down once again on his bed, being careful of Puck's backside. "Puck I need to take you to the hospital. You're still bleeding and you need to tell someone what happened to you."

"NO! I AM NOT GOING TO THE HOSPITAL! NO!" Puck yells at Finn. His eyes focus on Dave and Santana, "GET THEM OUT OF HERE! I DON'T WANT ANYONE TO KNOW! I DON'T WANT ANYONE TO KNOW!" Puck begins to struggle, trying to get out of the embrace of Finn's arms. Finn doesn't let him go.

"You are hurt Puck! You need help!" Finn's loud voice seems to get through to Puck as he stops struggling. He feels his best friend deflate against his body.

"I'm not going to the hospital Finn. They will look at us like we're gay or something and they won't believe me. A guy doesn't get.." Puck is shaking his head back and forth unable to say the word rape.

Dave looks at Puck and knows what Puck is saying is true. No one is going to believe that a guy like Puck, sex shark and predominant high school jock, was raped at a party. "Puck you need to let Finn or one of us make sure the bleeding has stopped. Let one of us help you get cleaned up." He keeps his voice calm and gentle speaking with Puck.

Santana seems to snap out of it and turns around to Finn. "You need to take care of him Finn. He trusts you." She reaches out to Puck and watches him flinch when she tries to touch his arm. Like Dave she keeps her voice gentle.

"Puck you need to let Finn help you. You know he isn't going to hurt you; he is not the one that did this to you. Can you let Finn make sure the bleeding has stopped?" She doesn't try to touch him again, but she stoops down so that she is looking into his dark umber eyes.

Puck nods his head and whimpers when Finn picks him up carrying him to the bathroom. Once they are in there, Puck tries to stand on his own. Finn catches him before he can fall to the floor. He grips the vanity with one hand while undoing his jeans and letting them fall to his ankles.

Puck can feel a warm dribble running down the inside of his thighs. He doesn't know if it is blood or cum. He almost hopes its blood; the idea of a guy's cum leaking out of him makes him retch in to the small white sink. _Why did this happen to me? You know why this happened to you. You deserved it, just like he said._

Finn doesn't know what he is supposed to do, how he is suppose to check Puck. He sees the tracks of dried blood mixed with fresh and what he knows to be dried semen on the inside of Pucks' thighs. Finn swallows back the bile that is pushing up his throat. He thinks if it was something deadly then wouldn't the blood be gushing out? He stands up looking at Puck's face in the mirror; he has never seen the badass look so vulnerable.

"The bleeding has almost stopped Puck. I don't know what else to do, how to check you. So um, do you want to take a shower or a bath? The bath might help with the pain. A shower might make you feel cleaner. I like showers better myself. I don't know which one you like better." Finn knows he's rambling but he has no idea what to say to Puck.

Santana's voice fills the room, "he needs to soak." She has been searching Burt and Carole's medicine cabinet looking for antibiotics and pain pills. Dave told her that since Puck refused to go to the hospital, he would need to take some antibiotics to make sure he didn't develop an infection from the tearing. The next few minutes are spent getting the tub ready for Puck. Finn helps him get into the tub without too much trouble, the hot water easing the pain in his backside.

Outside of the bathroom Dave, Finn and Santana have a quiet meeting of sorts. They are working through what happened at the party and if either of them saw anyone lurking around Puck. Dave touches the thing he found that is in his pocket. He doesn't remember seeing the owner at the party. He doesn't want to accuse anyone until he talks with Puck. So he keeps that bit of information to himself.

"Puck needs us. He may not think so, but he does and we are going to do whatever it takes to take care of him." Dave holds his hand out to Santana in a gesture of comfort. "We are also going to make a promise that whatever he tells us we will keep it to ourselves. If anyone finds out what happened to him the guys at school will rip him to shreds. Okay?" Dave watches as Finn and Santana nod and agree to the promise.

Santana hands the pills to Finn telling him to follow the directions on the bottle and that he needs to start taking them tonight. She looks at the place where Puck had been laying on Finn's bed seeing the bloody spots she pulls it off and tosses it out of the room. She asks Finn were the other linens are and tells Dave to find Puck some loose clothes.

Finn goes back into the bathroom taking the pills to Puck. He watches his childhood friend hug himself even in the hot bath water. Finn wants to kill whoever did this to the indestructible jock. He holds the pills out to Puck and a glass of water.

"Here Dave said you need to take these so you don't get an infection and one is to help with the pain. Come on Puck, take them." Finn wants to cry when he sees the dead look now in the once twinkling hazel eyes. He watches Puck take the pills from his hand and swallow them down with the offered water. But that is all Puck does his eyes going back to the spot on the wall.

Finn notices the water has turned a pale pink and takes the unused wash cloth he had left for Puck in his hand. He opens the drain so that the dirty water can start going down the drain and turns the faucet on for fresh clean water. He soaps it up and gently begins to bathe his best friend.

Puck doesn't fight Finn. In his dark and pain filled mind his best friend is the only person he trusts right now. It makes him feel helpless letting Finn wash him, but his body won't listen to him. He can see everything that is going on but he can't participate in anything. He stands on shaky legs when Finn tells him he has to wash him there.

Puck whimpers when he feels the soft cloth being rubbed against his thighs. Finn doesn't go any farther just cleaning the tracts that the hot water didn't remove. The hot spray from the shower nozzle in Finn's hand rinses the evidence away. A soft huge bath towel is wrapped around Puck's body as he steps from the tub. He slumps against Finn, closing his eyes to the reflection showing in the mirror.

Finn gently dries off the dark teen being as careful as possible not to cause Puck anymore pain. He helps him put the clean clothes Dave left on the vanity. Finn helps him go back into the bedroom and lay down in the bed. The pain pill is mixing with the leftover alcohol that is still in his system making it take effect quicker causing Puck to become drowsy.

Dave and Santana had made beds in the floor for themselves. Neither one wanted to leave Puck alone, even though Finn was there. Most people thought that Santana and Puck only hooked up for sex; they were also as close as best friends. He was the first person to know that she was in love with Brittany and he never judged her for it.

Dave was different, they weren't even friends but Dave had always admired the way Puck carried himself. The way he stood up for what he believed in and the people he believed in like Santana and the Glee kids. Sure they still fought and argued but Dave never attacked Puck or let anyone else fight him. Since the debacle with Kurt and the kiss he had turned his attention away from the soprano and kind of had a crush on Puck. But Dave knew that if Puck ever had feelings for a guy it would be Finn. Theirs was a bromance of epic proportions and no one could ever break them up, not even Quinn Fabray!

"Why are you guys still here?" Finn looks at the makeshift beds and the two people he would never had thought of being in his bedroom at the same time. Well all four of them in the same room let alone his bedroom.

"We aren't going anywhere Finnocence. Get used to it. I love the jerk and someone hurt him tonight. I'm going to help protect him and make sure he survives this nightmare." Santana leaves no argument open with her words. She looks at Puck with love and a smile.

"We may not get along but I care about him too." Dave looks at Finn's shocked face and sees Puck's gaze fall on him. "Look Santana is the only one that knows this, but I am gay. And I kindalikePuck. And no one is going to hurt him again."

"Dude you're gay? You harass Kurt, drive him away and now you say you're gay? And you like Puck?" Finn is getting upset until he hears Puck's empty voice.

"It's okay Dave. I always knew man. Finn, I just want to go to sleep. I just want to forget this happened to me."

"This is so not over Karofsky!" Finn points a finger at Dave. "We will deal with this in the morning." Finn doesn't know where he is going to sleep until he feels cold fingers interlace with his pulling him towards the bed. He turns to see the droopy eyes looking at him.

"Please Finn, I need you.'" Three simple words break Finn's heart. He kicks his shoes off and climbs in the bed lying down next to Puck. He watches the darker teen wince in pain as he tries to work his way closer. He gently pulls Puck against his chest feeling the shaking teen wrap his arm around Finn's waist.

Dave turns the lights out and lies down beside Santana. He feels her body shake slightly and knows she is crying. He pulls her against him letting her know that she isn't alone. None of them are alone in this.


	3. Private Emotions

Chapter 3

Private Emotions

Finn woke up to the smell of breakfast floating through the air and just for a brief moment life was good; until he heard the shouting downstairs. Dave and Puck were shouting at each other with Santana's voice trying to calm both of them down. Finn throws the comforter off and runs downstairs.

Puck was sitting at the kitchen table across from Dave. Santana had gotten a soft bed pillow and placed it in the wooden chair so Puck would be able to sit and eat breakfast. The two jocks were arguing heatedly about what happened to Puck the night before while Santana cooked breakfast.

"Puck you need to talk about what happened to you!" Dave reaches across the table trying to take Puck's hand with his own.

"Look I just want to forget it happened alright? Just leave me alone about it!" Puck jerks his hand away looking at the table.

"Puck if you don't get this off your chest it will eat you up inside!" Dave yells at him.

"Shut the fuck up! _You_ don't know anything!" Puck slams his fist down on the table making the dishes rattle. He keeps his head lowered not wanting anyone to see the shame filled tears burning down his cheeks.

"Dave's right Puck! You need to talk to us and let us help you!" Santana knows that Puck is stubborn and will keep it bottled up if they can't convince him to admit what happened to him.

"Stop telling me I have to talk about it! It didn't happen to you! It happened to me!"The tear stained face screams at his friends. Puck grabs the edge of the table flipping it up sending dishes flying through the air. He is filled with blind terror and rage.

Dave grabs the table before it completely flips over on top of him, but he can't save the dishes or the orange juice that is raining down on him. He watches Finn grab Puck from behind both of them falling down onto the tiled floor. Finn is yelling at Puck to calm down. Puck fights Finn with all the strength he has left in his body. He watches as Santana joins the two flaying teens grapple on the floor.

"You have to stop fighting us Puck! We aren't your enemies! Puck look at me!" Santana has her hands on either side of Puck's face trying to reach the young man inside; her words are loud and harsh.

Puck looks into the dark eyes of Santana and can't help the strangled sob that escapes his dry lips. He reaches for her wrapping his arms around her small lithe body; burying his face in the crook of her neck. He feels her slim but strong arms wrap around him pulling as close as possible to her body. He sobs openly in her arms letting go of the terror and pain.

Finn stares in awe at the way Santana handles Puck. She lets him cry never speaking just holding him tight her own tears mingling with Puck's. He hears the sound of Dave cleaning up the broken dishes and glasses. Finn stands to help Dave finish cleaning up the floor. He doesn't know what else to do for Puck.

The strangled sobs are subsiding into shaking breaths as Santana helps Puck to stand up on unsure legs. She helps him walk back to the table watching for glass or porcelain on the floor placing the pillow back in the wooden seat she motions for him to sit down.

"Okay baby I want you to sit here and just talk. I don't care what you talk about but talk to us. Talk about Dave's little crush on you. Talk about the weather or my awesome cooking; I just want to _hear you_ talk to us okay?" Santana's tone of voice is full of love and understanding as she wipes away the last of his tears. She watches Puck nod his head and she raises an eyebrow at him.

"Fine, I will talk out loud; happy now?" The slight sarcasm in his voice makes her smile as she turns back to the stove to finish breakfast.

"So Dave I'm sorry for throwing the table at you. I just; I don't know what to say. I don't want to talk about it but you guys are not going to leave me alone about it; are you?" Puck looks at his friends his voice is hoarse from his outburst. _Yep Dave is a friend too. When the fuck did that happen?_

"It's okay man, I pushed you too hard and I'm sorry for that. I just want to help you; that's all Puck. " Dave can't hide the blush that is creeping up his cheeks or the slight smile he directs at Puck.

"What the hell dude? You are flirting with Puck after what happened to him?" Finn explodes as he watches the interaction between the two former enemies.

"Finn! Stop the yelling!" Santana threatens Finn with a spatula. She gives him the evil eye that could stop Satan in his tracks; she learned it from Coach Sylvester.

"At least I'm honest about my feelings." Dave sneers at Finn.

"What the hell does that mean?" Finn looks at him with such a confused look that Puck laughs at him.

"It means that Dave likes me and I am not going to freak out about it. I'm okay with it, being around him." Puck nods at Dave who is attempting to sit down at the table with him but Finn keeps pushing the table around blocking him.

Dave finally grabs the table and stops Finn from moving it around anymore. "Thanks Puck it's not like I am going to stalk you or anything like that; I have changed for the better I hope." He looks pointedly at Finn while speaking to Puck.

"You stalked, harassed and threatened Kurt! You made him leave school, his friends and we are just supposed to sit here and act like nothing is wrong?" Finn receives a hard smack on the back of the head from a spatula. "Ow!"

"For your information Finnocence, Dave apologized to Kurt some time ago. Kurt accepted it and they may not be friends but they have gotten past it. Kurt still has issues with fear and the rest of the bullies at WMHS. Dave even offered to protect Kurt if he came back but he wants to stay at Dalton." Santana says matter of fact as she puts the plate of eggs and toast in front of the boys. "So just let it go Finn, we have bigger things to deal with now."

"You and I can settle this later just between the two of us. For now let it go Finn." Dave looks from Finn to Puck. "Are you hungry Puck?"

Puck nods and shifts uncomfortably in his seat from pain; physical and emotional. He looks at the trio sitting around the table with him, "I just wanted to say thanks for everything." He smiles at Finn; a soft smile that speaks volumes to everyone sitting at the table except Finn. "Can we eat now and talk about…that….later?" Everyone agrees and soon the breakfast cooked by the Latina is gone.

After a couple of hours of trying to play video games, they are sitting in Finn's room on his bed when Puck's phone starts ringing; 'Blame It On the Alcohol' plays loudly. Puck knows the ringtone; it's his mother. He looks at the phone in his hand and doesn't want to answer it. "I don't want to go home." He looks at Finn who takes the phone and answers it.

"Um hey Mrs. P. No. Puck isn't feeling well; he's in the bathroom getting sick. No, no, he just ate my cooking today. No I don't think he needs to go to the doctor he just needs to rest. Right Mrs. P I will call you if he gets worse. Is it okay if he stays a few days with me? Mom and Burt are out of town and I don't want to stay alone in the house. No we aren't throwing any parties or having girls over. We just plan on playing some Halo and going to school. Thanks Mrs. P and yes ma'am I will make sure we come over tomorrow so he can pick up some clothes and check in with you. Bye." Finn hands the phone back to Puck with a shrug. "Looks like you're staying here for a few days dude."

"Thanks man." Puck looks at Finn through dark lashes. The boy sitting across from him is his whole world most of the time. It's more than friendship he feels for Finn but he doesn't want to risk losing him over something as stupid as loving him. He looks at Dave and Santana knowing they are waiting for him to start talking about what happened last night.

"It's time Noah." Santana's soft voice and the use of his real name making him wince. "You can do this and we are right here." She raises his chin up forcing him to look at them. She watches Puck take a deep breath and listens as he begins to speak.

"I..I was wasted last night. Finn had my keys so I knew I could drink and not worry about driving home. I didn't want to spoil his evening so I went upstairs to sleep it off some before going home. I passed out. I don't know for how long. I-I woke up w-when I-I felt something hur-hurting me. Some-something was ripping me up in-inside; tearing m-me in half. It was so dark I couldn't see anything." Puck closes his eyes feeling the tears of pain slip down his cheeks. "I-I couldn't move. I-I couldn't scream. Big badass c-couldn't stop it c-couldn't stop some g-guy from…He k-kept saying I-I was his b-bitch, th-that I deserved it." Puck looks anywhere but at his friends. He's suddenly so cold his body shaking and trembling. "I d-deserved it."

Dave reaches for a blanket that was lying on the floor from their makeshift bed last night. He hands it to Finn motioning at the trembling jock that had stopped talking. Dave noticed that Santana was wiping tears away from her face when he realized the wetness on his own face. He wipes the tears away mentally promising to viciously hurt the bastard that did this to Puck.

Finn wraps the warm blanket around Puck making sure not to startle him. Once the blanket is draped around Puck he can feel Puck snuggling into his side seeking comfort. He does the only thing he can think of putting an arm around Puck he starts to stroke the stripe of dark hair that is resting against his chest. After a few minutes of silence he can feel Puck's body start to relax.

"You didn't deserve this to happen to you Puck. No one deserves this thing to happen to them. You were scared and you were hurt; that's why you didn't fight back. It wasn't because you were weak." Finn keeps stroking the stripe of dark hair; letting his blunt nails gently scratch Puck's scalp.

"I should have been able to fight, to kick his ass; but I just laid there. I freaked out and I couldn't do anything but lay there and take it. It still hurts Finn what he did to me; it still hurts." Puck burrows his head deeper into Finn's chest if that is possible. He can feel Finn's warm strong arms hold him.

"No one is ever going to hurt you like that again Puck; no one. I promise you that I will always protect you." Finn doesn't realize what he is doing when he nuzzles Puck's dark stripe with his own nose. It just feels natural to comfort Noah.

Santana watches Finn, the big lummox has no idea how much he loves Puck or how much the fragile boy he is holding loves his big ass either. She wonders if they will figure it out before the rape can damage Puck more than it has already. Santana looks at Dave and then back to Puck as she softly begins to sing. Dave joins her when he realizes what she is singing and why.

_We all drink to forget  
>Some of us more than most<br>When reality gets too real  
>And the fires of hell to close<br>But I'm here to let you know that  
>That you can make it through<br>If you believe that someone is watchin' over you_

_And call it an angel_  
><em>Call it a muse<em>  
><em>And call it karma that you've got comin' to you<em>  
><em>What's the difference<em>  
><em>What's in name<em>  
><em>What matters most is never ever losin' faith<em>  
><em>'Cause it's gonna be alright<em>  
><em>You're not alone tonight<em>

_We all have our days_  
><em>When nothing goes as planned<em>  
><em>Not a soul in the world<em>  
><em>Seems to understand<em>  
><em>And for someone to talk to<em>  
><em>You'd give anything<em>  
><em>Well go on and cry out loud<em>  
><em>'Cause someone's listenin'<em>

_Yeah, and call it an angel_  
><em>Call it a muse<em>  
><em>And call it karma that you've got comin' to you<em>  
><em>What's the difference<em>  
><em>What's in name<em>  
><em>What matters most is never ever losin' faith<em>  
><em>'Cause it's gonna be alright<em>  
><em>You're not alone tonight<em>

_Keep your faith alive_  
><em>You're not the only one<em>

_Yeah, and call it an angel_  
><em>Call it a muse<em>  
><em>Call it karma that you've got comin' to you<em>  
><em>What's the difference<em>  
><em>What's in name<em>  
><em>What matters most is never ever losin' faith<em>  
><em>Yeah, you're gonna be alright<em>  
><em>You're not alone tonight<em>

_Oh you can cry if you want to, go on_

They watch as Puck drifts off to sleep in the warm cocoon of Finn's arms and the soft voices. They talk quietly about school tomorrow and how one of them has to be with Puck during his classes, walking with him in the hallways; they devise a plan to keep Puck safe and the rest of the school safe from his outbursts.

Puck sleeps off and on for the rest of the afternoon and evening. They deal with the torrents of nightmares that are filled with pleading screams. They take turns trying to sooth and quiet the petrified jock.

As night begins to fall Santana and Dave have to return home, their parents want them home on a school night. Both teens promised to be there in moments if either Puck or Finn needed them. Finn is shocked by Dave's behavior when he pulls Puck into his arms talking quietly to the darker teen and brushing his lips quickly across the stripe of hair. He doesn't understand the sharp pain he feels in his chest watching this moment; he only knows that he doesn't like it.

Finn walks them to the door while Puck takes a shower. "I promise to call you Santana if it gets bad." He ignores Dave still upset over the private moment he witnessed upstairs.

"You better Frankenteen! If you don't I will make your life miserable." The fiery Latina tells him as she pokes a fingernail in his chest. "I don't have that many true friends Finn but Puck is at the top of the list. So you take care of him tonight for me. I will see you all in the morning." She turns walking to her car watching for a fight between Finn and Dave.

"What were you saying to Puck Dave?" Finn glares at the larger jock.

"That's between me and him Finn. It wasn't anything for you to worry about. He can tell you if he wants to it's up to him. I will meet you and Puck in the parking lot in the morning." Dave turns to walk away from Finn but stops turning back around to face him again. "You may hate me Finn, despise me but Puck needs _all of us_ right now. This is about him not you, not me or Kurt. Remember that before you start questioning my motives or try to keep me away from Puck." Dave walks away towards Santana's car when he hears Finn say "be there around seven." He simply nods and gets in the car.

Puck and Finn arrive at school the next morning both with dark circles under their eyes from the stress of the past couple of days. Finn had slept little trying to make sure Puck slept. Puck was also walking with a slight limp from the soreness he still felt in his body. Dave met up with the two jocks in the parking lot while Santana met them inside by the lockers.

Puck felt like everyone was staring at him; that they knew what happened to him. Every whisper or look he felt was focused on him. He made it through his morning classes' okay; Finn, Santana or Dave being there to make sure no one startled him or touched him. They made a subtle barrier around the traumatized teen. Everything was decent until lunch.

Dave is standing in line for some lunch when he hears the taunts by the hockey team. "So you're joining Homo Explosion?" "What the hell Dave since when did you turn queer?" The worst one coming from his friend Azimio "Is it true? You turning fag for Puckerman?" that is when all hell broke loose in the cafeteria.

Finn and Puck had just walked in when Azimio's words filled the strangely quiet room. Puck was suddenly filled with a red rage and was pummeling Azimio before anyone had a chance to stop him. The element of surprise being on Puck's side allowed him to have an advantage for a couple of seconds before Azimio switched their places and began beating the hell out of Puck. When Finn and Dave tried to pull them apart the other hockey players plus Mike and Sam joined in the fight.

Twelve black eyes, five split lips, three cracked noses, and two blaming matches later everyone is in the choir room, since they all could not fit into Figgin's office. Coaches Sylvester and Beiste are there to help keep the peace along with Emma, Will, and Figgins. The adults are trying to sort out the mess.

"Okay miscreants who started the foreplay in this squabble?" Sue is the first to speak to battered and bruised group of teenagers. She notices that Karofsky is sitting next to Puckerman and Hudson. _Strange...Hmmm_

"He started it. He came out of nowhere and attacked me!" Azimio is pointing at Puck who simply stares at the wall; he is sitting in the corner with Dave and Finn beside him and in front of him.

"You started it Azimio when you called Karofsky a fag!" Santana had been involved in the foray but no one seemed to notice the Latina fighting in the mix. She walks into the room nodding at Sue. "You hit Puck first when he told you to shut up!" The hockey players' start calling her a liar and that Puck threw the first punch. "When Finn and Dave started trying to break them apart the rest of the dumbasses jumped in and started fighting." She crosses her arms over her chest and looks at Sue communicating silently with the cheerleading coach.

"Well Figgins there you have it. Sexual Harassment is not tolerated by the school." Sue looks at Figgins like question my decision and I will have your balls on a plate. "Let Snow White over there lecture them and send them back to class."

"If it were only that simple Sue, but I feel like there is more to this story than what I am hearing." Figgins looks at Coach Sylvester with pleading eyes. "I can't ignore the fact that ten jocks were involved in a fight in front of everyone in the cafeteria."

Another blaming game begins between the jocks, shouting insults and nasty names at each other; everyone that is except for Puck. He is just sitting there with his arms wrapped tightly around himself. Dave and Finn notice how Puck is acting during the shouting as does Emma.

"I have an idea. What if everyone, all the jocks in this room, have to perform a musical number at the next assembly? It would force them to have to work together and maybe learn to get along." Ms. Pillsbury smiles at her own idea.

"I don't think that is appropriate punishment Ms. Pillsbury." Figgins starts to argue before he is cut off by Sue.

"Sure it is Figgy! Or do we need to see certain pictures on the six o'clock news tonight?" Sue raises an eyebrow at the trembling Principal. She doesn't know what is going on but if Lopez needs her help then so be it.

"Fine! Just make sure the song is appropriate and that no more fighting happens until then or it's detention for every single one of them!" Figgins waves his hands in the air as he walks out of the room.

"Okay guys you heard Mr. Figgins the next assembly is in two weeks that should give Will enough time to put something together. Check back with him to find out the rehearsal schedule and what music you will be singing." Coach Beiste smiles at Emma hoping that the OCD woman is right. "And you heard Figgins, NO MORE FIGHTING!" She yells at the jocks.

"Okay now that is over and I do mean OVER if you need to go see the nurse then by all means GO! If you need your noses straightened out please feel free to come and see me. I haven't gotten in my allotted torture of students today! Otherwise; head to your classes NOW!" Sue revels in the scared faces of the tough guy jocks as they scramble out of the room. She walks by Santana and whispers, "my office before the day is over kid" before she exits the room.

Another wave of the blame is being muttered by the exiting jocks and Azimio tells Dave that "they will talk later" before walking out. He has no idea what is going on but he is going to find out one way or another.

Coach Beiste, Will and Emma look at the remaining five guys. Will is the first to start speaking to them.

"I don't know what just happened or what happened out there but you guys needs to start talking to me. And Puck why were you defending Dave? I thought all you guys in Glee club hated him." Will watches as Finn starts to speak instead of Puck.

"Mr. Shue they were saying stuff about Glee club and how Dave was turning gay over Puck. Azimio really started the fight." Finn wasn't exactly lying about what happened he was just omitting a couple of things. And there was no way he was going to say fag not after Burt had almost killed him last year.

"He's right Mr. Shue Azimio started this crap." Dave looked at Puck who was still staring at the wall.

"When Sam and I got there the hockey team out numbered our guys so we were just trying to even the odds." Mike Chang speaks out and Will is shocked but what happens next causes Will to take a step back from boys. Puck is shouting at him as he kicks the chair across the room.

"**Look we all know that you want to blame me so just do it! What the fuck do I care? It's my entire fault! There I said it! I started the fight! I made him attack me! I couldn't stop it! I couldn't…Fuck this!**" Puck screams as he runs from the room.

Will stops Finn and Dave from following Puck out of the room. "I want to know what is going on with Puck. Something is wrong." Will states to both boys. Santana is out the door before anyone could stop her but she doesn't know what else to do except run after Puck.

"Look Mr. Shue I, we, really don't have time to explain right now. Puck needs to be the one to talk about it but its bad and _we have to go after him_. Sorry." Finn jerks out of the hold Will has on his shoulder grabbing Dave by the arm and running out the door. A quick call to Santana and they know he is headed to the football field.

Puck doesn't feel the pain, the physical pain only the emotional torment that is raging through his heart and soul. He keeps running out of the school to the football field, the one place he feels safe where he does matter, he collapses on the ground curling up letting the tears fall. _It was my fault...I let it happen...My fault..Why me?_

Santana reaches the field and sits down beside Puck simply rubbing his back trying to calm him. Dave and Finn are there a few moments later both boys sitting on their heels around Puck. They just sit there letting him cry. Santana moves his head into her lap while Finn and Dave rub his back or his arms. All three murmur quiet words to the jock.

Azimio watches as Hudson and Dave run out of the school heading for the football field he decides to follow them. Something is up with his boy Dave and he is going to find out what.

When he arrives at the field he stands by the bleachers hidden from the four on the football field. Azimio looks at the 40 yard line, the scene is surreal McKinley's resident badass is crying…_What the fuck! Puckerman crying? _He watches all three, Dave included, try to comfort Puck but nothing seems to be working.

Puck fights the two boys pushing them away. He can't make out what the Jewish boy is yelling at Dave or Finn but Puck continues to knock their hands away from him. Santana is the only one that seems to be able to touch him.

Azimio feels fear and dread creep into his stomach; he doesn't like the way Dave is acting around Puck. It's almost like he _really cares_ about Puck. The wrong kinds of caring, dudes don't _care_ about each other like that. He steps away from the cold metal bleachers walking back to class with one thought in his mind _making Puck pay for turning Dave. _


	4. I Always Have

Chapter 4

I Always Have

Puck couldn't understand why Finn still wanted to touch him. He was dirty, he was used goods. When he touched him it just made him realize it more, he wasn't clean anymore.

"JUST STOP! STOP TOUCHING ME! STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT ALL BETTER! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" Puck screams at them as he stands up wiping furiously at his face. "I JUST WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE FOR A WHILE!" Puck walks away from the football field heading back to school. He leaves his friends in a stunned silence.

Dave stands and goes after Puck. He knows that the last thing Puck needs is to be alone. It may be what he wants but it isn't what he needs. He also needs to talk to Puck alone without Finn or Santana being there.

Finn stands to go after Puck but Santana stops him. "Let them go Finn. We can't help Puck unless he allows us to; otherwise we will cause him more pain and anger. Dave will take care of him; make sure no one messes with him."

"What are you now, some kind of expert?" Finn lashes out at the dark skinned girl. He doesn't want anyone taking care of Puck but himself especially Dave.

"No dickwad I just read as much as I could last night on the net about male on male rape. This is going to get worse for all of us before it gets better. Do you want to know what I found out?" Santana looks at the big lumbering jock, she knows Finn is just worried about Puck but he needs to understand what has already started happening to their friend.

Finn nods his head. He knows this isn't Santana's fault. There was only one person to blame and they didn't know who that was, only Puck knew.

"Puck is going to have dramatic mood swings. He is going to try and pretend that it never happened to him. He is going to become depressed and hate himself; flashbacks reliving the rape whether he is asleep or awake. He is going to think he deserved this rape. Puck is going to be scared of someone touching him. We have already seen this stuff start happening. Well most of it has started happening." Santana looks out across the field blinking back tears.

"There is something that you aren't telling me isn't there? What is it San!" Finn can tell by the tears slipping down her cheeks that she doesn't want to say it out loud.

"He may try to commit suicide Finn. Our boy may try to kill himself because some freak raped him!" Santana cries into Finn's shoulder. She can't help the shaking sobs; she doesn't want to lose her best friend.

Finn doesn't want to think about the possibility of Puck killing himself. After everything they went through last year with Quinn and Beth; they were finally back to being best friends again. Finn couldn't lose Puck again and he sure as hell couldn't lose Puck forever and death is forever.

"Does Dave know what you just told me?"

"Yeah I told him last night when I found the website listing all the information and it even had real stories from the victims. It made me sick reading it. How could someone rape someone else? It doesn't matter if you are a guy or a girl; how could you do something that horrible to someone else?

You may not want to accept Dave but he has changed and last night showed that to me. I think it made Dave think about what happened with Kurt in a different way. He kept saying that could have been him. He always knew what he did to Kurt was wrong but last night showed him how wrong it really was." Santana pulls away from Finn looking up into his dark eyes. She watches him digest all the information she just gave him.

"I don't know if I can ever forgive him for what he did to Kurt. I won't try and start anymore shit with him but it will take me a long time to accept him as a friend. Puck accepts him and that is all that matters at the moment. But if he hurts Puck I will end him, nothing you can say will stop it." Finn hopes that Santana believes him. He watches her nod and they both get up and walk towards the school.

Dave caught up with Puck at the locker room and maneuvered the stormy jock inside. He doesn't touch him just opens the door and motions for him to walk inside. Dave watches Puck walk over to the wooden bench in front of the lockers and sit down noticing the pained expression on Puck's face when his bottom hits the hard surface. He waits for Puck to start talking.

Puck places his head in his hands rubbing the short stubble on either side of his Mohawk down to the back of his neck.

"What do you want?" Puck finally looks up at Dave.

"I want you to tell me the truth; that you know who did this to you." Dave tells him as he reaches in his pocket for the item resting there. He pulls the item out keeping his closed hand around it blocking it from Puck's view.

"It was dark. I never saw his face." Puck mumbles with his head bowed back down looking at his scuffed shoes.

"Stop lying to me, to yourself. You know it was…" Dave is cut off when Puck leaps up off the bench and slams him into the lockers.

"Shut the fuck up! You don't have the right! You don't know! It happened to me! Not to you!" Puck screams in Dave's face while his fists are tangled in the front of the larger jocks shirt. He watches Dave's hand open up in front of his face revealing the small object.

Puck felt his knees go weak and wrapped his hands tighter around Dave's shirt. He stares at the small object in the jock's hand; his mouth opening and closing, his eyes wild with fear. He begins to shake his head back and forth his eyes never leaving the object. Puck feels his body slide down the front of Dave's his knees finally giving way.

Dave feels the dark skinned jock starting to collapse and he holds onto him sliding to the floor with him. He can feel Puck starting to shake against him muttering '_it happened to me..he did it to me_'. Dave whispers that no one is ever going to hurt him again, that he would never let this happen again to him.

"We both know who did this to you Noah. I won't say _his_ name until you are ready to say it yourself. I won't try to kill the mother fucker and I won't tell Finn or Santana. I will leave it alone until you are ready to do something about it. The moment you say his name I will make sure he never does it again."

Dave holds Puck for a little while letting the smaller jock calm down. He can feel the tears soaking into the front of his shirt that Puck is still gripping in his hands.

"I don't want to say _his_ name. I don't want to remember what he did to me, but every time I close my eyes it's all I see. When it's quiet I keep hearing what he said to me. I just want it to stop! Please!" Puck begs to anyone listening to him. He trusts Dave and he feels safe. It doesn't feel the same as when Finn holds him. Puck can feel Dave's strength and it helps to ease the fears that are building up inside of him.

When Finn holds him he can almost pretend that Finn loves him, really loves him. He breathes in the smell that is only Finn, a mixture of soap and the outdoors. The rough hands that held him last night keeping his safe from his nightmares for a little while. For a little while he can pretend.

But when he woke up this morning before Finn all he could feel was shame; shame of not being able to defend himself, not being able to stop that bastard from taking something from him.

"Noah whatever you need I am here for you. I know you love Finn. Someday that idiot will realize he loves you too. Hell he practically threatened me over you. You need to let him help you get through this, you guys survived Quinn and baby-gate. The two of you will survive this too. I promise." Dave hopes he isn't making an empty promise to Puck/Noah. He helps him to stand up walking over to the sink.

"I'm not the same Dave. I don't know if I ever will be. I lost something Saturday night that I can't get back, a part of me. _I am not the same_." The words are bitter sounding; hurt and sorrow echoing in one spoken by Puck.

"You can't let him win Noah! You can't let the bastard stop you from being the badass of this school. You can't stop being PUCK!" Dave holds Puck's face in between his hands looking him straight in the eyes. "If you let him win this will destroy you and I can't lose you or your friendship. So we are going to walk out of here and you are going to hold your head up. Okay?"

Puck nods and pulls his face away and splashes cold water on it. He looks in the mirror and sees the dark circles under his dark hazel eyes. He has a bruise on his cheek from Azimio. Puck closes his eyes for a moment and when he opens them his face is set hard, jaw tight. The Puck mask is in place.

"Let's go." The words are simple yet spoken in a growl. Both teens walk to the door and head back to class.

Dave sends a text message to both Finn and Santana telling them to keep an eye on Puck, letting them know that for right now he is okay.

The rest of the school day is spent making sure that locker checks are the only things Puck does to the nerds and to some of the hockey team.

Even the Gleeks hear about Puck going back to some of his old ways and wonder what is up with the reformed bully. When they ask Finn or Santana what is wrong they are told that Puck is just being Puck. No one in New Directions approaches Puck; the scowl on his face leaves no doubt that he is not friendly to anyone, even them.

Santana had met with Coach Sylvester before Glee and told her what happened to Puck, if Santana Lopez trusted anyone it was Sue Sylvester. The coach went ballistic when she heard the details and told the Latina if she needed anything to help Mohawk just to let her know. Sue had a soft spot for the resident badass of McKinley. Santana thanked her and headed for Glee.

When everyone arrives at the choir room they all gasp when they see Dave Karofsky sitting there with Santana, Finn and Puck.

"Oh hell to the no! You don't have any right being here!" Mercedes is the first to go off on Dave.

"You are not allowed in our private sanctum! Get out!" Rachel screeches at the top of her lungs pointing at the door.

"What the hell dude?" Sam looks at the odd foursome sitting together.

"Is this some kind of joke? Trick?" Artie wheels in front of the jocks.

Mr. Shue walks in on the drama just as Santana and Finn stand up blocking Puck and Dave from the others.

"You need to back up Aretha! Dave has just as much right to be here as you do!" Santana looks like she is ready to fight any of the Gleeks.

"Everybody calm down! I asked Dave to try out, to be a part of our group! This isn't a trick or anything like that!" Finn yells at the group. He and Santana had already come up with a cover story for Dave's presence in the choir room. "Remember we need one more person since Lauren quit. I asked Dave and he agreed end of story!"

"I can't believe that you are supporting this, debacle!" Rachel hisses at Finn.

"It's a good thing your opinion doesn't matter to me anymore. He deserves a chance just like we did!" Finn says pointing between him and Puck. Their breakup had not been amicable; Rachel had almost cheated on him with Blaine. If almost is catching them naked in her bedroom. Finn was surprised it didn't hurt as bad as he thought it would.

"He drove Kurt away! Kurt left because of the bullying! Did the two of you forget that? " Quinn shocks everyone by yelling at Finn and Santana.

"Dave apologized to Kurt a while ago! They worked it out! Text Kurt if you don't believe us!" Santana holds out her phone.

Text messages are fired off in rapid succession to Kurt from everyone but the four.

"Oh My God! It's true! Kurt just text me that they did work it out!" Mercedes looks like someone could knock her over with a feather. She takes a seat away from the jocks and Santana. Everyone groans as their phones buzz with the same message from Kurt.

Mr. Shue knows that there is more to this story like Figgins did this morning, but he isn't going to press them. Not now.

"Okay well this is awkward but like Finn just said Dave has the right to try out. So Dave do you have a song you want to sing for us?" Mr. Shue; all but chokes on his own words.

"Uh….Yes I do." He walks up to Brad, the ever present piano player that never says anything and whispers his song choice. "Um this is an old rock song but the lyrics mean a lot to me. Is it okay if Santana helps me out Mr. Shue?" Dave watches the teacher nod in approval and waits for Santana to stand beside him.

Brad begins to play and Santana knows who the song is for; Dave himself.

_I am just a simple man, working  
>On the land, oh it ain't easy<br>I am just a simple man, working  
>With my hands, oh believe me<em>

Freedom is the only thing means  
>A damn to me, oh you can't fake it<br>Freedom is the only song, sings  
>A song for me, oh we're gonna make it<p>

I am just a simple man, trying  
>To be me, oh it ain't easy<br>I am just a simple man, trying to  
>Be free, oh believe me<p>

_Freedom is the only thing means  
>A damn to me, oh you can't fake it<br>Freedom is the only song, sings  
>A song for me, oh we're gonna make it<em>

I am just a simple man, working  
>On the land, oh it ain't easy<br>I'm just a simple man, working  
>With my hands, oh baby, believe me<p>

I'm just a simple man, yeah, yeah  
>Freedom is the only thing means<br>A damn to me, I'm just a simple man, yeah

Everyone is shocked by how good Dave's voice actually sounded on the old rock song. Santana had kept her voice soft on the chorus just barely backing Dave up on the song. The applause was minimal, but that was to be expected.

"Wow Dave you have an amazing voice! Welcome to New Directions!" Mr. Shue is in total shock at the smooth sound of Dave's voice. He watches the pair move back to their seats. He begins to talk about the assignment that will be due the next time they meet which is in one week.

"Now your assignment for next week's meeting…I want you all to go out of your comfort zones and sing about loss. It could be about losing your girlfriend or boyfriend, losing someone because of an accident, losing your innocence of the world, just makes sure the music expresses your loss appropriately." Mr. Shue hopes that the assignment can help him to reach out to Puck through music. He knows that Puck will not talk voluntarily to him.

The rest of the meeting is spent working on their songs and routines for Nationals. Dave is shown the choreography and given the sheet music to learn. There is almost a dividing line, imaginary but still there, between the four friends and the rest of the club members. It was a quiet animosity between the two sides.

Santana walks out of the choir room with Puck, they head to their lockers. The other Gleeks have started to leave the room as well. Finn stays behind to talk with Dave.

"What the hell happened with you and Puck after the football field earlier? He has been bullying people again!" Finn is angry with Dave blaming him with Puck's behavior. "He doesn't need to be a jerk to handle this!"

"That's where you are wrong Hudson! He has to be PUCK! If anyone sees him weak or being a victim then the other jocks and everyone he has ever bullied will take him out! His life will be hell! They will DESTROY HIM!" Dave yells at Finn. He knows that if he hadn't changed he would be leading the pack. Now it's his best friend Azimio and in some ways he is worse than Dave.

"That's what we are here for Dave! You, me, Santana…We are here to make sure they can't hurt him anymore. He could snap and really hurt one of the nerds like Jewfro or that Ryan kid from the chess club." Finn is pacing as he tries to make Dave understand his point. "He could think that one of them is the one that hurt him! You know better than anyone that he can fight better than any of us!"

"Hudson, we can't always be there for him! We can't keep following him around without everyone becoming suspicious! He has to be strong on his own and if he can show that he is still the badass of this school then everyone will leave him alone! If the others find out what happened to him or even think they know; we will lose him permanently! Didn't San talk to you about what she read on the net?" Dave is losing his patience with Finn.

"Yes! But…" Finn is cut off by Dave being completely honest and blunt with him.

"Finn it is what I would do if I didn't care about him. I would see that something is wrong! I would know that he is weak right now! I would use every chance I found to make his life miserable to hurt him. And Z is better than I am at picking up on this kind of thing! Noah has to be Puck, has to be the asshole, the bully right now!" Dave watches the truth hit Finn like a brick. Dave finishes putting the sheet music in his back pack.

"What if we lose him? Santana said that he could try to…I can't lose him Dave! I can't lose my best friend again not forever! What if he doesn't get better, what if he stays a bully this time?" Finn looks like a lost puppy. He doesn't understand why his world would end if Puck was gone, dead. He just knows it hurts too much to think about.

"We are going to make sure he gets better Finn. I'm not going to lose him either. And San is definitely not going to let him go without a fight." Dave offers Finn a small smile. "Come on let's go before Santana rips us both apart for taking too long."

Puck opened his locker and found a note with '_your time is coming bitch_' scribbled on it in black marker. Puck looks up and down the hallway finding no one except Santana at her locker he crumples up the note and shoves it into his backpack. He doesn't tell anyone about it.

The four met up in the school parking lot. Plans were made for Dave and Santana to meet Puck and Finn at the Hudmell house after checking in at home. Puck still had to go and check in with his own mother and collect some clothes for school. After the four met back at the Hudmell home they played video games and watched a movie. Dave and Santana leave after the movie.

Finn noticed that Puck would move away from him whenever he got close to the darker teen. If Finn tried to touch him, Puck would step away or scoot farther away from him. When it came time for bed Puck stated that he would sleep on the floor and Finn tried to reason with him that he would be more comfortable sleeping on the bed, but Puck was animate about not sleeping in the bed with Finn.

It was past midnight when Finn heard the first muffled sounds from the floor. The sounds were followed by thrashing limbs. Finn rolled out of the bed landing on the floor next to Puck. A street lamp outside illuminated the bedroom, giving enough light for Finn to see Puck was tangled in the quilt. Calmly he began to un-wrap Puck's fighting form speaking words of comfort to the scared teen.

"Puck, it's me Finn. I got you. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you. You're safe Puck."

"F-Finn?" The voice sounds like a frightened child.

"Yeah it's me. You're okay Puck." Finn pulls the smaller jock into his arms. He picks him up off the floor and crawls back into his bed with Puck hanging on to him for dear life. Finn rests his back against the headboard while Puck's arms are around his neck. Finn drapes Puck's legs across his lap wrapping his arms around the shaking body. Both boys drift back to sleep.

Finn is alone in his bed when he wakes in the morning. Jumping out of bed he runs to the window to see if Puck's truck is still outside and it is still parked in the drive way. Finn quickly dresses and goes downstairs and finds Puck quietly drinking coffee.

Puck watches as Finn opens his mouth to say something and he growls at his best friend. "Let it go."

Finn sees the tight hard line of Puck's jaw and knows it is useless to try and talk to him about last night. So he just grabs a quick cup of coffee and they both head for school.

The next few days are spent the exact same way; Puck being the bully at school and avoiding any physical contact with Finn. The nights are a different story. They are spent with Finn holding Puck whispering words of comfort and love to the terrified jock after another nightmare. The night before Carole and Burt are due back Finn had a brave moment as they were getting ready to go to bed.

Finn grabs Puck by the wrist and pulls him down beside him on the bed.

"What the hell Finn?"

Finn doesn't reply instead he wraps his arms around Puck and holds on to him. Puck tries to push away but Finn only tightens his grip pulling the struggling jock closer to him.

"Let me go Finn!"

"…"

Puck struggles harder against Finn trying to break free of the strong arms holding him tight. He ends up lying across Finn's broad chest and his body begins to betray him, instead of struggling; his body is seeking comfort from the hulking teen. His arms are no longing pushing away but holding on pulling himself closer to Finn.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Puck can feel the tears starting to form in his tired eyes. It feels so good for Finn to hold him but it also hurts like hell.

"…"

"You are holding me like I mean something. I'm not the same. I'm nothing now. I'm a whore just like everyone says. _Just a dirty whore_." The last sentence is a choked sob from Puck's lips.

"**YOU ARE NOT A DIRTY WHORE!** You do mean something Noah! You mean _everything _to me! I was so mad at you when Quinn was pregnant! I was mad at you for lying to me and choosing Quinn over me!

We have been together since we were eight years old! You and me against the world remember? And it is still you and me, plus Santana and Dave now. But it will always just be you and me!" Finn cries as he tells Puck how he is feeling. "We can survive this, YOU CAN SURVIVE this! I can't lose you again! I can't lose you forever! Let me be there for you Noah."

Puck curls tighter into Finn's body letting the larger jock's warmth comfort him. He still doesn't understand how Finn could want to touch him, to hold him.

"I'm dirty Finn! I was used by someone else! How can you stand to touch me?" Puck wails into the strong chest.

"YOU WERE RAPED NOAH! You didn't ask for this to happen to you! Some guy found you passed out and he raped you! This isn't your fault!" Finn buries his face in Puck's Mohawk holding him tighter.

"You called me Noah."

"Because you are Noah to me. You will always be that skinny little kid with curly hair that beat up Bobby Campbell in the third grade for picking on me. You have always protected me Noah now it's my turn to protect you." Finn can feel Noah's body relax against him and he is almost asleep when he hears the soft mumbled words against his chest.

"Love you Finn"

The words fill Finn's heart with so many emotions, yet fear is not one of them. Finally after years of wondering what it meant when his heart would break over Noah doing something stupid or getting hurt, he realized what his heart had been trying to tell him all along.

"I love you too Noah. I always have."


	5. Promise Me

Chapter 5

Promise Me

_Thanks to everyone that reviewed. Sorry it took so long but life does happen to all of us! I know Emma makes an appearance in this chapter and it is necessary. And to all Berry fans, sorry but to me this is something Rachel would do. She is all about winning and being right! So please read and review! Hemmy_

The next morning Puck wakes up tucked safely in Finn's arms. The soft puffs of warm breath from Finn's lips caress his ear making him snuggle deeper into Finn's warm body.

Suddenly two things become apparent to Noah; Finn's hardness is pressing into his backside and his own hardness is leaking against his worn dark blue boxers.

Noah freaks out bolting from the bed to run into the bathroom locking the door. He clamps a hand over his mouth stifling the scream that is moving up his throat. Noah slides slowly down the door shaking his head from side to side willing the tears to stop before they spill from his umber eyes.

_Why am I turned on? I was…raped. How can I want sex? How could Finn want me? The one thing I thought I could give him, the one thing I didn't give to anyone else is gone. Everyone is right I am just a loser, a Lima loser. _

_Maybe I did want it to happen. I have fucked up my life in so many ways. I deserved this for what I did to Quinn, to Finn. She offered me something that should have been Finn's and I took it. I had something I wanted Finn to be the only one to have and someone took it from me. _

_I let Quinn take my daughter and give her away like a kitten or a puppy. She is going to a good home, a better home than you could provide. I just signed the papers. I let her give my baby girl away! I didn't even try to fight for her! _

_Just like the night of the party, I didn't try to fight back! I just let that fucker stick it in me! I let him hurt me! He…He…inside me! I just laid there. I let him take the one thing I had held on to for Finn and I didn't fight for it! I deserved it! I was __**his**__ little bitch! I even….Oh God! _

Noah crawls to toilet the raising the lid. The only thing that comes up from his empty stomach is bile but he can't stop retching; the sound of his dry heaves filling the bathroom.

The sudden movement from the bed and the sounds that follow from the bathroom causes Finn to wake up. He throws the covers off and quickly steps to the bathroom door.

"Noah you okay?" There is no answer. "Noah? Are you sick? Noah? Answer me!"

Finn is becoming scared now, the retching sounds continue. He tries the door but it is locked. He looks around the room for a way to get inside the bathroom without breaking down the door. He finds none. He looks down and sees his hardness starting to deflate.

_Oh shit! Did I hurt him? Did I try to…Oh my God it's my fault! He must have felt it this morning! Shit! What do I do? _

Finn decides in that moment of panic the hell with it and using his overtly large foot kicks the door in to the bathroom.

Noah stands on trembling legs from the toilet he knows he has to let Finn in the room. He is splashing cold water on his face trying to stop retching and the crying when the door crashes open. Terror overtakes Noah as he scrambles back in the corner beside the toilet; shoving his body painfully back into the narrow space.

Finn regrets it the moment he sees the fear in Noah's eyes and watches as the panicked teen wedges himself between the toilet and the wall screaming **NO** at him. Finn tries to get Noah to come out but all that seems to happen is Noah wedging himself tighter and he begins to beg Finn to leave him alone.

Finn does the only thing he can think of and walks back into his bedroom and calls Santana. She tells him that they are on their way. Dave had picked her up that morning and they were just leaving her driveway. Finn tells her to hurry that Noah is truly freaked out and he can't reach him.

A few minutes later he can hear the heavy footsteps of Dave and the Spanish muttering of Santana can be heard coming up the stairwell. Finn points at the bathroom and Santana immediately goes in there. She closes the door as best she can.

Turning around she finds her best amigo pushing with his feet trying to slide further back into the corner his feet slipping on the wet tile flooring. She notices the scraped knees, the red marks that are littering his chest from the toilet in the cramped space. His eyes are more amber than umber looking wildly around the room.

"Oh baby. It's okay. It's me Santana, you're okay now." Santana gently coos to Noah. It literally breaks her heart to see the fear and terror in his hazel eyes. "Come on out baby. No one is going to hurt you, especially not Finn. He loves you baby he would never hurt you."

"S-San I can't do this anymore! I can't deal with this! I just want to step out in front of a bus or drive my truck in front of a train! I just can't do this!" Noah cries out in frustration and pain. His body is stuck between the wall and the toilet. "I gave away Beth. I didn't fight for her! I didn't fight the other night! I just laid there and I let him fuck me! Oh God! I just want to die!"

"There is no way in hell I am going to watch my best friend kill himself Noah!" Santana is crying now hearing the words she knew would eventually come out of his mouth. She tries to coax him out of the small space his body is trapped in, but she can't budge him. She calls for Dave to come into the room and help her get him out. Noah tries to push her hands away from him.

Noah fights them both as Dave nearly breaks the toilet pulling Noah from the tight spot. Noah takes a swing a Dave telling him 'LEAVE ME ALONE'! Dave dodges the punch and grabs on to Noah holding him against his chest letting him continue to fight. Santana tries to calm him but she isn't getting anywhere with the struggling jock.

Finn watches from the doorway as Santana and Dave wrestle with Noah before he joins in; he had heard what Noah was shouting at Santana about killing himself. Finn grabs Noah from Dave and pulls him into a tight embrace.

"I LOVE YOU NOAH! YOU CAN'T DOTHIS! DEATH IS FOREVER! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! I LOVE YOU!" Finn yells at Noah. Finn begs as Noah begins to slump against him. "I can't lose you not after figuring out I love you. Please don't leave me Noah. I'm sorry I hurt you this morning. I didn't mean to. Please don't leave me Noah. Please!"

"You didn't do anything wrong Finn! It was me! You can't love me! I wanted you to be my first! I didn't even fight back! I just let him fuck me! It was suppose to be you! Not…It was the only thing I had left Finn that no one else had touched! Now I don't have anything to give you!" Noah is sobbing into Finn's chest. Both boys slide down to the floor, Finn cradling Noah in his lap like a kid.

"Your heart is all I want Noah. Your heart and your love." Finn whispers in Noah's hair. He holds Noah so tight not letting go. "Talk to me Noah. If I didn't do anything wrong this morning then tell me what is wrong."

Noah shakes his head not wanting anyone to know what happened the shame is too much.

"Please baby you need to talk to us. We don't want to lose you. We all love you too much and we aren't going to let you go and do something bad that you can never take back. Please." Santana's tearful pleas are almost whispers as she kneels on the floor.

"Noah we aren't going to judge you. There is nothing that you can say to us that is going to change how we feel about you. Please talk to us or at least talk to someone." Dave's voice cracks, he heard the desperation in Noah's voice. He knows the jock is capable of suicide. Dave sits beside Santana on the cold hard floor.

"I got…I was hard when it was happening…I don't remember doing it…My pants were stuck to me…I….I enjoyed it if I…Oh Fuck!" Noah curls into a tight ball in Finn's arms his breath raggedy sobs. "It hurt so…it was ripping me in two... How could I enjoy it? "

Santana holds both of his hands. She knows Noah didn't enjoy it; the nightmares, the panic attacks, freak outs like this one proved that. He just has to understand that his body is going to react to any type of stimulant. "You didn't enjoy it. Your body reacted to the pain Noah. You didn't get off on what the creep was doing to you. It was just your body reacting to the pain, it was a stimulant. You didn't do anything wrong baby. He did, the creep that raped you!"

"It's like when you get scared and it gets hard. It was just a reaction Noah. It doesn't mean you enjoyed it." Dave looks straight at Noah hoping he is really listening to them. The teen looks so small against Finn's chest, the tear stained face; he resembles a small trembling child.

"What happened this morning; Noah? What made you freak out when you woke up this morning?" Finn tilts Noah chin up to look into his glassy red rimmed eyes. "What made you get so sick?"

"I woke up hard. I felt so safe in your arms. And then I felt you and I felt so scared and dirty cause I wanted you. Even after what happened I wanted to be with you. But I wanted you to be my first. I wanted to give you something that no one else had ever touched or had from me. But h-he took that from me just like I took Quinn from you!

Then I got to thinking about Beth and how I didn't fight for her. I let Quinn take my little girl from me and I didn't fight her.

I didn't fight back the night of the party either. I just laid there! I just laid there and let him take it from me! And I came! I'm a coward Finn! I'm not good enough for you to love!" Noah begins to struggle in Finn's arms trying to get up out of his embrace.

Santana and Dave can't believe how honest Noah is being with Finn or how Finn just said he loved Noah. Both know that something else happened last night, they just don't know what. But hearing Noah basically telling Finn that he is in love with him is a start for both of the angst ridden teens. They watch as Finn keeps a tight hold on Noah. Santana motions for Dave to follow her out of the bathroom. This is a private moment between Finn and Noah.

"Let me go Finn!" Noah yells at him.

"No!"

"I came Finn! I fucking came! You can't love someone that is like me!"

"I love you! And what happened to you isn't going to change that, nothing is ever going to change how I feel!" Finn knows he is crying but he doesn't care. He just wants to know that Noah is going to be okay, that he isn't going to drive his truck into a train or a light pole. "THE ONLY WAY I AM GOING TO LET YOU GO IS IF YOU PROMISE ME YOU ARE NOT GOING TO KILL YOURSELF! I MEAN IT! IF YOU DIE I DON'T THINK MY HEART CAN TAKE LOSING YOU!"

"Finn I can't!"

"Yes you fucking can!"

Noah is struggling so hard that he is sweating and becoming slippery in Finn's grip. So Finn holds onto Noah stands and pulls him into the shower. He turns on the cold water trying to make Noah stop struggling against him, to stop freaking out. The water is freezing to both boys but Finn continues to hold him under the icy waterfall. _Cold showers sober people up so why not calm them down too._

Noah is trying to turn his body away from the freezing ice pellets. He only manages to turn his body around, his chest pressed against Finn's. He looks into the dark caramel eyes and sees only love and hope. He can't think with the cold water running down his back.

"Promise me dammit!" Finn's teeth chatter but the anger is still there.

"Fa-Finn…"

"I love you Noah! Promise me!" Finn reaches and turns the cold water off. He can feel Noah's body shaking hard. He pulls Noah closer to him wrapping his arms around Noah's trembling body.

"I-I-I p-p-promise." Noah is so cold that his chin will not stop chattering. He buries his face into Finn's chest trying to find warmth.

The shower door is quietly pulled open with Santana and Dave holding big fluffy warm towels. Santana envelopes Finn in the towel she is holding wrapping the towel around him. Dave slowly approaches Noah trying not to spook him. He gently wraps the warm towel around Noah's shoulders walking him out of the shower.

"We left you some clothes on the bed and I called Coach Sylvester. She is going to cover for us until we make it to school. I am going to see if I can find something we can eat on the way to school." Santana tells the two cold teenagers who are shivering under their towels. Dave follows her out the door and down the stairs to give them privacy. They both heard the shouts coming from both boys in the shower.

Finn wraps his towel around his waist and calmly walks up behind Noah who is just standing there gripping the towel in his hands. He begins to slowly towel the smaller jock dry hoping to warm him.

After almost ten years of friendship, this is the first time he has really looked at the other boy's body. Yeah sure they had looked at each other in the locker room, all guys do, but not to actually _look. _

Looking down at the top of Noah's head Finn can see the smaller scars from different "accidents"; skateboarding, jumping off each other's roofs, bicycle stunts. The largest scar came from making a bet with Roger McNabb that he(Noah) could swing high enough to flip over the swing. Noah lost the bet and almost died from it. The old swing was rusted and the chains broke sending Noah flying through the air to land on the concrete sidewalk. It took twenty something stitches to close the tear made by the edge of concrete and two whole days before Noah woke up. That was the first time Finn could remember feeling anything similar as to what he did earlier in the shower.

He continue drying Noah until the darker jock takes the towel from him and finishes the job himself.

Noah sees the look on Finn's face and knows his friend is going to want to talk about _it_, "I don't want to talk about it Finn. I made you a promise. I won't break it." Finn nods at Noah not knowing what else to do he starts to get dressed for school.

They work in silence, Finn still watching Noah. He notice the cold tremors that shake Noah's body and he knows it is from the cold shower. He walks to his closet and pulls out one of his hoodies and throws it on the bed with Noah's clothes. Noah just nods his head and finishes getting ready.

Santana has found some breakfast bars for everyone and she distributes them as Finn and Noah come into the kitchen. "It's not waffles but at least we won't get hungry soon." She notices the small nod from Noah at her words.

Dave hands everyone a bottle of water as they exit the house. "Are you ready _Puck_?" Dave watches as Noah's jaw sets in a hard line. He watches as the Puck mask falls into place once again, there is no emotion showing even in Noah's eyes.

A dark ominus cloud enters WMHS in the form of Noah Puckerman. The hallways are parted without so much as a raised eyebrow from the jock. He is walking with the biggest baddest of school each one walking with determination in their step.

Once they are checked into school for being late, they drift towards their classes. By lunch time Puck has slushied two nerds and Jewfro was missing. Jacob Israel is latter found hanging from the flag pole by his underwear. He attempted to interview Puck about his relationship with Finn Hudson since everyone knew he had been sleeping at the Hudmel house while the parents are away.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxx

When Emma Pillsbury heard of the recent events, even though she privately giggled at the flag pole incident, she decided to do something about it. She had watched Noah Puckerman change during what the kids called baby-gate and she did not want the young man to lose everything he had gained from the experience. She was there when Finn told Will "that it was bad but Puck would have to tell him". Emma remembered what Noah had said, _**I couldn't stop it. I made him attack me**__. _Emma can feel the tears slipping down her cheeks. _**I thought the same thing….**_

Emma shivers at the thoughts those five words bring to the forefront of her mind. It was a little known fact that Emma could possibly recognize the words. Most of the kids thought she was crazy because she was always so clean so neat. It was OCD but it had a root cause, she had been raped her freshman year at college. She was a clean freak because she always felt dirty, especially when it came to sex. She just has to figure out a way to reach Noah without making him run away.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

An emergency meeting of New Directions was called that afternoon. Rachel felt that it was their duty to make sure Puck stopped giving the Glee club a bad name and to get rid of Dave Karofsky; while Kurt may have forgiven him the rest of the club had not.

Mike, Sam, and Artie could not understand how Finn and Puck would hang out with Dave. Or how they could endorse him to join Glee. They tried to talk with the boys but it seemed like Dave always showed up or Santana was there with them. Their was never any alone/private time with Puck or Finn.

Brittany and Quinn had tried to talk with Santana but the fiery Latina told them to mind their own business that Puck was fine. She told them that they really needed to leave Dave alone too. That he was not the enemy this time.

Mercedes had talked with Kurt and he gave the same message as before, he and Dave had worked things out. Dave wasn't a threat to the club anymore.

Tina was the only quiet one in the room. She thought if everyone just looked at the whole picture then they would see that something was wrong and it wasn't just Dave being around them, but the group as a whole. Puck and Santana were friends with benefits but Tina knew they were also best friends. Finn and Puck were trying to repair their friendship and had been since last year, but they were far from being the way they were before baby-gate. And Dave just seemed to appear right after Santana's party.

_Something happened at the party! _But there is no way she is going to voice that thought. The group before her reminds of the lynch mobs in the old westerns her grandpa liked to watch. She watches Rachel who is trying to get everyone's attention.

"I think what we need is an intervention. We separate Puck from the rest of them and we tell him either his behavior stops or he is being voted out along with the rest of _that group_." There is disdain in her voice at the last two words.

Some of the Gleeks agree with her while others do not.

"Rachel you have finally gone bat shit crazy! There is no way we are going to vote the others out of this club. You need to think of something else Crazy." Mercedes is the first to defend the others. She knows that Rachel has a hidden agenda where Finn is concerned, little Miss Perfect cheated on Finn.

"Puck is my friend and I am not going to kick him out." Brittany says with her arms crossed over her chest.

"I am not going to support whatever you have in mind Rachel. I am not going to vote anyone out or help with any stupid fucked up scheme you concoct. This is on you guys. They are my friends two years ago I wouldn't say that but a lot has changed since then. So I'm out of here." Tina kisses Mike on the cheek and grabs her stuff leaving a stunned group behind her. Brittany and Mercedes follow after kissing their boyfriends.

Rachel decided at that moment she would just have to trick everyone into helping her. She just had to figure out how.

Xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The day ended without anymore incidents involving Puck. Dave and Santana dropped Finn and Noah off at the Hudmel house so Noah could pick up his truck and clothes. Carole welcomed both boys and thanked Noah for staying with Finn. When Carole asked the boys about the broken dishes and glasses, Finn took the blame saying he broke them cleaning up the kitchen. Carole really didn't buy the story but there was no evidence of alcohol or a party so she let it go.

Noah headed him in his truck. His mother was at work and Sarah was over at a friends house until dark. He walked upstairs to his room and put his dirty laundry away before collapsing on his bed. He pulled his IPOD out and put it on shuffle letting the music block out the quietness of the house.

Sarah walked into the house hearing her brother scream NO over and over. She ran upstairs and found him in the corner of his room. He wasn't blinking or answering her. The ten year old did the only thing she could think of and called Finn. She told him what was going on with Noah and that she was scared for her brother. _It's like he is a zombie Finn. _

Finn told her that he would be there in a couple of minutes. She just needed to keep talking to her brother, to tell him everything was alright.


	6. Inconclusive

_Chapter 6_

_Inconclusive _

_As always thanks to everyone that reviewed! And this chapter is a little bit of everything! Please review and I will try to answer them...Life has been really busy for me! I hope that you enjoy! And a very special shout out to WithoutTheRain, WithDemonWings and ValBabe! My friends you are dear to me! Peace Hemmy _

Finn is running down the stairs after the phone call from Sarah. He can only focus on one thing and that is getting to Noah. _"he's like a zombie Finn!"_ He could hear the terror in the young girls voice. He knew that Noah was having a flash back and nothing Sarah could do would bring him out of it. Carole was in the kitchen when he grabbed his keys off the table.

"I'm headed over to Noah's mom. I think I'm going to spend the night."

"Finn it's a school night and it is almost nine. I think you need to stay home."

"Mom, I HAVE TO GO! Noah needs me!"

"Finn what is going on? You called Puck, Noah."

"Something happened while you were gone, I can't tell you because I promised him I wouldn't tell anyone. But he needs me right NOW! IHAVE TO GO!" Finn is all but begging his mother to understand something without being told anything.

"Finn…"

"_Mom I love him."_

"I know you do sweetie, but YOU have to tell me what is wrong and what happened to Noah_."_

"_No mom, I mean I really love_ him."

"Finnegan Hudson-Hummel, I have known since you were playing in the sandbox with Noah that you _love_ him! Ruth and I both knew! We used to tease each other about the wedding and what name you would use. But then you started dating Quinn and Noah, well Noah became…He just really _liked_ anything that moved or had a pulse. So we just thought…Well never mind. I am going with you to Noah's." The discussion is ended when Carole grabs her purse and keys. "Let's go."

The drive is silent and quick as Finn stares out the window praying that Noah is okay. When they pull up in the driveway Sarah opens the front door and runs out to Finn, "please help him!" Carole gathers the young Jewish girl into her arms trying to comfort her as she watches her son run into the house.

Finn takes the stairs three at a time, he can hear the sobbing and the chanting of the word NO, STAY AWAY FROM ME!. He steps into the room it is totally dark, flipping the wall switch on he is greeted by the sight of a completely crazed Noah who is backed into the far corner of his room holding a wooden baseball bat to his chest.

Carole has made it to the doorway of Noah's room. She told Sarah to stay downstairs while she checked on the boys. The sight before her terrifies her.

Noah isn't blinking. He is breathing rapidly and gasping each breath. His face is tear stained with phlegm and spit running down his lips and chin.

"Oh My God! Finn stay away from him! He doesn't see you!" Carole has seen that vacant look in patients eyes before at the hospital. She knows that Noah doesn't recognize them or know they are in the room with him. She takes a step towards Noah.

"Noah, honey, it's Carole. Noah look at me." Carole slowly walks into the room. "Noah can you hear me? Noah?"

"M-Mom?" Noah called his mother Ma and had always called Carole Mom.

He had felt like she was his mom most of the time when they were little. His Ma had to pull two jobs after his father left so Carole took care of him and Sarah when he was too little to take care of a baby. Carole was there when he was sick, when he hurt himself, and when he needed to cry about his Dad.

"Yes Noah it's me." Carole steps closer to terrified teen. "Please put down the bat Noah."

"Make him go away! Make him stop hurting me!" Noah is staring at the other side of the room. There is no one there that Carole can see. "He won't leave me ALONE!"

"Noah look at me! He's gone baby. Please put down the bat so I can make sure you're alright. Please." Carole steps in front of Noah's line of sight and kneels down in front of him. Finn stays behind his mother, he knows he can grab the bat if Noah goes after his mother.

'Ma-Mom?" Noah lays the bat down on the floor and reaches for Carole. "Please help me…"

Carole catches Noah in her arms after he launched himself at her from the corner. She holds him tight stroking the stripe of dark hair knowing that it used to help him calm down. She murmurs quiet soothing noises to him promising him that it is going to be alright no matter what happened, it is going to be alright. She feels Sarah's small arms try to wrap around Noah and can hear the child tell her big brother that she loves him. Carole sends Finn after a cold wet wash cloth to sooth and to clean Noah's face.

"Noah, you have to tell me what is wrong. What happened to you? Please son, it's the only way I can help you." Carole's voice is soft and gentle.

"H-He wouldn't stop h-hurting me. He kept p-pushing and p-p-pushing inside of me. I couldn't stop him, I c-couldn't do anything. Mu-Mom he hurt me, hurt me bad." Noah sounds like a small child, his voice breaking and cracking with the words. "M-Mom make it stop, m-make it go a-away."

Finn is back with the wash cloth and looks at the tears in his mother's eyes. He looks at Sarah clinging to her brother she too is crying. Finn just wants to punch the wall. All the pain and suffering in this room can be blamed on person and Finn vows to make Noah tell him who it was so he can end the sick bastards life.

Carole reaches for the cloth in Finn's hands noticing the anger and rage that is etched into her son's features. "Finn, you and Sarah go downstairs and get Noah something to drink. I need to talk to Noah alone. Okay?" Carole's tone is gentle but strong. She needs to take Noah to the hospital and it isn't going to be easy talking him into it. She watches Finn pry Sarah loose from her brother promises her that they will be right back and his mother will take good care of Noah.

Carole waits until they are out of the room before she starts talking to Noah as she wipes his face down.

"Noah tell me what happened to you? Were you attacked?"

Noah nods his head looking down at the floor.

"Noah honey, did someone…..rape you?" Carole watches as Noah turns himself more into her body. His body starts shaking violently in her arms as she feels his head nod yes to the question. _Oh My God! This can't be happening to him, not the strongest kid she knows! _But she knows in her heart it's true. She sits there rocking him in her arms for a few more minutes before calling Finn to come back upstairs.

"Finn I need you to take care of Noah for a minute. I am going to check on Sarah and I have to do something okay?"

"Sarah is fine Mom. What are you going to do?" Finn asks.

"Don't worry about it honey, you just stay here with Noah for a minute and I will be right back." Carole kisses Noah on top of the head before Finn sits down next to her and takes Noah in his arms.

Carole goes downstairs and makes a phone call to the hospital. She asks first to speak with Dr. Lopez who she trusts. She explains to him what is going on with Noah and that he needs to be examined and tested privately. He tells her to bring him in the employee entrance and he would be waiting for them.

The second person she needs to speak with is Ruth Puckerman. She quickly tells her to meet them at the employees entrance that she is bringing Noah. She knows it isn't fair not to tell Ruth but she knows the woman is not going to take this well. _Hell I am not taking this well! How could someone rape a kid? What sick twisted person could hurt someone this way?_ She heads back upstairs.

"Finn can you pick up Noah and carry him to the car?" Carole asks when she arrives back to Noah's room. She watches Noah start struggling in Finn's arms.

"Yeah Mom." Finn is trying to hold on to Noah.

"Noah you have two choices you can either walk to the car or Finn can carry you. But either way you are going to get into the car." Her voice is even and strong.

Noah quiets against Finn. He would never disobey Carole.

"Sarah I want you to go and get in the car and wait for us sweetie." Carole watches Sarah leave the room after just arriving.

"Finn take Noah to the car and put him in the back seat and stay back there with him." Carole starts following the boys out of the room and down the stairs.

The drive to the hospital is relatively short but feels like it takes an eternity. Once Noah figures out where they are going he begins to fight with Finn in the back seat trying to get out of the car. Getting him out of said car once they arrive is another battle as Noah fights to stay in the car.

Finn and Carole finally win and Noah is in Finn's arms outside of the car.

Dr. Joseph Lopez is waiting with two nurses and a gurney at the employees entrance. They help Finn place the frightened teen on the gurney and begin to try and calm him down, assuring him they were not going to hurt him. Carole goes to meet Ruth as Noah's mother walks through the employee locker room.

"Carole what the hell is going on? Why is Noah coming in through the employee entrance?" Ruth is mad and frightened at the situation. Angry because no one has told her what is going on and scared that is something really bad.

"Ruth I had Joe meet us here…because I don't want the other staff members to know what happened until you do. Noah…has been…raped. Sarah called Finn begging him to come to your house and take care of Noah. Finn wouldn't tell me what was wrong except that it was bad and that Noah made him promise not to tell anyone.

I went with Finn and found Noah having a flashback in his room. Ruth he didn't know who we were, he kept screaming for the guy to leave him alone to stop. It took me several minutes to get through to Noah that there was no one in the room . He finally broke down and told me part of it, that he was raped. I'm so sorry Ruth." Carole pulls Ruth to her hugging her while Noah's mother breaks down in tears.

"Who-who did this to my boy Carole? WHO DID THIS TO MY NOE?" Ruth's voice is rising, demanding answers.

"We don't know. Noah has never said who did it. Noah just kept saying him or he. Not a name. " Carole is crying with Ruth now.

Dr. Lopez appears in the doorway.

"Ruth I am going to have to sedate Noah for the exam, he is fighting against everyone. I just wanted to make sure that was okay with you. And we are testing him for HIV and other STD's. Finn and Sarah are waiting outside the trauma room for you."

Ruth nods her head at Joe. Both mothers follow Joe to the little hallway where the kids are waiting outside of the small trauma room. They can hear Noah scream for everyone to leave him alone. That he doesn't need to be checked out.

Ruth goes to her son hoping that she can help the other nurses calm him down. She tries to tell him that everything is going to be okay, to let Dr. Joe do his job. She listens to him beg her to take him home. To just let him go home.

Ruth fights back the sobs that are trying to escape her lips. Her baby boy, her Noe, is shaking, terrified of anyone that touches him. The way he looks at her with betrayal in his eyes makes her shudder. She can't stop the tears that fall down her cheeks.

She watches as her oldest child curls up into himself begging everyone to leave him alone, just to leave him alone. The screams turning into whimpers as the sedative starts to take effect. Ruth Puckerman has never felt more at a loss over her son than right now.

"Ruth I need you to step out of the room now. This exam is nothing like a female rape kit. You need to be with Sarah right now. I don't want you watching this for your own sake." Dr. Lopez talks quietly to her. He finally takes her arm gently pulling her out of the room to where Carole is standing. "Make sure she stays out here Carole."

Carole nods her head at Joe as he turns to go back into the room. She looks at the small woman who has been her friend for many years. They both raised their children alone without fathers, without any help except from each other. Ruth's life had never been easy, two jobs to pay bills and two kids.

They had spent many afternoons together just trying to figure out ways to save money on groceries and things to do with the kids that didn't cost anything. When the kids(boys) got older they pitched in together to make sure whatever sport the boys were interested in they both could afford the equipment. Sometimes Carole missed those simple days and she knew right now so did Ruth.

Ruth pulls Sarah into a hug answering her daughter's questions as honestly as possible. Sarah told her mother how she found her brother freaked out in his bedroom to calling Finn. Ruth assures Sarah that she did the right thing calling Finn. She had taught her children unless someone was dying or bleeding not to call her at work.

Ruth then hugs Finn thanking him for being there for Noah. She knows the past year they had been trying to work through the aftermath of baby-gate, Quinn and Rachel. It seemed to Ruth that both boys should learn no matter what their lives would always be intertwined with the other's.

The next hour is spent watching nurses come and go from the room. Blood samples being taken to the lab in the name of J. Smith. Machines are being brought in; an ultra sound and a CCD camera. Another thirty minutes pass by before Joe steps out of the room.

"Ruth I need to talk to you and Carole in private." Dr. Lopez waits for Finn to take Sarah for a soda in the cafeteria. Once the kids are gone he looks at Ruth and Carole with a grave expression and begins giving his assessment of Noah's situation.

"Ruth I don't know any other way to say this except being blunt about it. Noah was raped, I am guessing last weekend. There is tearing along the outer sphincter muscle ring and inner anal walls. The tears are not life threatening nor do they need stitches. I am having antibiotics pushed through an IV to help fight any infection that could occur. Physically Noah will heal but his emotional state has me worried.

While flashbacks are not uncommon the severity of what Carole described to me on the phone and the way he reacted to in the trauma room is not common place. I would recommend that he not be left alone, that someone is with him or around him. And I am going to prescribe something to help him sleep. I am also asking you to make sure he gets some type of counseling.

I know this is hard for you, it would be for me if it was Santana. But you have to help him be strong and you have to remember about Sarah. She isn't going to understand what happened and she is too young to comprehend what rape actually is to a man. It's up to you how you explain it to her but she does need to know something in order to help Noah or to call for help if he has another flashback.

His labs also came back negative but he needs to be retested in six months. Rapists don't usually use protection and I know Noah has a bit of a reputation too. The sedative I gave him will wear off in a couple of hours and then you can take him home. Let me know if you need me again Ruth." Dr. Lopez is being paged to the Lab and Pharmaceuticals Floor.

Carole has been holding Ruth's hand during the entire one sided conversation with Joe. Both mothers enter Noah's room quietly.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Dr. Joseph Lopez walked into the Bio-Lab not really thinking about Noah Puckerman, the young man he had just examined in the trauma room downstairs. He was thinking about going home that night to his wife and daughter whom he seldom saw. He walks into the Roger Dunham office, they are long time friends and Roger is the administrator over the Lab.

"Hey Rog, I got you text/page. What's up?" Dr. Lopez sits in one of the comfortable chairs across from Roger's desk.

"Are you playing some kind of joke or prank on me today?" The administrator is not happy, his face set in a frown.

"No, not that I am aware of why?"

"You sent me this blood sample to run for HIV and other STDS. You also marked pregnancy on the sheet. The DNA of this sample shows the donor to be a male, not a female. Yet when I ran the test….It tested positive for the RYT gene….You know the rare gene that makes it possible for men to get pregnant?" Dr. Dunham's voice is getting louder with each word. "So is this some kind of fucking sick joke or what?"

"No Rog this isn't a joke. I have something I want you to see." Dr. Lopez hands him a CD case. "I just finished running a rape kit on a male juvenile and I ran a CCD camera to check for internal injuries to his anal canal. I found something that isn't suppose to be there on a male. Pop the disk in."

After the disk is popped into Dr. Dunham's laptop Dr. Lopez tells him to scan through the first five minutes and to pause it. The screen stops on an odd site. There seems to be an offset tube leading outside of the anal wall. Dr. Dunham looks at Dr. Lopez with raised eyebrows.

"This cannot be possible. There is a one in a five million chance that this is what I think it is."

"I know. And I checked it with the ultra sound, it is exactly what you think it is…"

"Joe it looks like a fallopian tube for an ovary and that is not possible!"

"What did the pregnancy test reveal since this is not possible?"

"The results were…inconclusive….neither positive nor negative."


	7. There Is Hope

_Thanks to everyone for reviewing and alerting! I have a soft spot for this couple and wish that RM would see the chemistry they have both on screen and off! Love is never easy…It is often difficult and messy…The depth of our love cannot be measured in words but in the words that are not spoken…Hemmy_

**Chapter 7**

**There Is Hope**

Noah slept for close to three hours before waking in the strange hospital room. When his eyes opened he could see his mother sitting across from him looking like someone had punched the life out of her. Dark circles around her eyes, the worry lines that etched her forehead, the small line where her full lips used to be.

He could remember bits and pieces of the car ride to the hospital. How it felt to be in Finn's arms, the soothing voice of Carole trying to calm him down. He remembered the look of terror on his little sister's face and he knew it was because of him.

A flash of his mother trying to hold him down for the nurses to give him the shot hit him like a ton of bricks. He couldn't hold back the sob that flew out of his lips as he looked at his mother jumping from the noise he made. He knew it was wrong but at that moment he didn't want his mother to touch him, he was afraid of her.

Ruth literally jerked out of the hard chair she had been sitting in for the past three hours. The sound of her son's half scream half sob brought her out of her thoughts. "Noah honey." She reached for her son only to watch him scoot farther back in the bed holding his arms out in front of his body. "What's wrong honey?"

"I-I want F-Finn! Where's F-Finn?" Noah looks around the room trying to find the one person he wants to hold him. "_**FINN!**_" Noah yells.

"Noah calm down. Honey please calm down." Ruth tries again to touch her son only to watch him curl up as small as he can in the bed. She watches as Finn runs into the room straight to Noah. It breaks her heart watching the tall jock pull her son into his arms; watching Noah wrap his arms around him crying into his shoulder and not hers.

"Noah. Shhhhhh, I got you babe. I'm right here." Finn strokes the dark stripe gently whispering into his love's ears as he holds Noah against his warm chest.

"I wanna go home Finn. Please get me out of here." Noah whimpered against the strong chest that protected him.

"We will soon. They aren't going to keep you overnight. Our moms just wanted to make sure you were okay. That's all. Dr. Joe said you could go home once you woke up." Finn pulls Noah back looking him in the eyes. The fear he sees in the darker jock's eyes hurt him deeply. "Baby they just had to make sure you weren't torn up inside. Everything is going to be okay."

"Noah honey please tell me what happened to you. Who did this to you?" Ruth is almost begging her son to talk to her. She wants to pull her son to her and make all this go away.

"You let them touch me. Knock me out so they could touch me…there." Noah accuses his mother of more or less betraying him. She was suppose to protect him not let them touch him.

"Baby they had to make sure you weren't bleeding internally or if you needed stitches. I'm sorry Noah, but I had to know you are okay." Ruth cries talking to her son. "You are the only son I have and I love you!"

"You can't help me Ma! No one can! I just want to forget about it! I don't want anyone else knowing! Please Ma! Let me forget about it!" Noah begs his mother.

"Noah you cant do that. I wish you could, I really do. But if you bury this it will destroy you and any chance you have for a normal life." Ruth states calmly to her son.

"I have never had a normal life Ma! I've been in love with my best friend since forever! I have a daughter I will never watch grow up! You're never home! I have to take care of my baby sister cause that son of a bitch left us! I have never been normal Ma!" Noah yells at his mother. "And now I AM DIRTY! A WHORE! I HAVE SLEPT WITH SO MANY WOMEN/GIRLS! THE ONE THING THAT I KEPT FOR ME TO GIVE TO FINN IS GONE! **I AM NOTHING NOW!**"

"Don't say that baby! You are a good and kind man! You are MY SON!" Ruth knows what she is hearing in his voice and she doesn't like it. "I love you! Sarah loves you! Finn loves you! I can see it in his eyes! None of this matters to us! It doesn't change who you are to us!"

"Just leave me alone Ma! Please! Just leave me alone!" Noah begs his mother clutching Finn's waist.

Ruth watches as Noah collapses against Finn crying openly now. She quietly leaves the room to talk with Carole.

"Noah's awake now." She looks at her daughter Sarah knowing that she wants to see her big brother. "Sarbear give him a few minutes alone with Finn okay? Then you can go see him." She watches the disappointment spread across the little girls features and it makes her wish she could kill the SOB that did this to her son!

"Carole can I talk to you for a minute?" Ruth need her once best friend now. She watches Carole step away from the wall and they walk a little ways down the hall.

"What is it Ruth?"

"I need you to keep Noah and Sarah for me tonight, if Burt doesn't mind. I should never have been in the room while they were working on him. He doesn't want me to touch him. I let them touch him. Oh God Carole he doesn't want me near him!" Ruth breaks down for just a minute letting Carole hold her.

"The kids can stay with us as long as you need them to honey. And yes you're right, you should have stayed out of the room. We keep parents out for a reason remember, so this doesn't happen." Carole hopes Noah can forgive Ruth soon because he needs his mother, he may not realize it but he does.

"Thank you Carole. I will let Sarah know that I will pick them up in the morning before school. And make sure Finn stays with Noah. I don't like what I heard in his voice while ago. It makes me afraid for my son's life." The sadness in Ruth's eyes is not match for the pain tearing at her heart. She turns and walks to talk to Sarah.

Carole steps into the room asking Finn to help Noah get dressed that they will be leaving in a few minutes. Noah looks at Carole and she lets him know that he and Sarah will be staying with her tonight.

After letting Sarah know that she would be going home with Carole, Ruth took off in search of Dr. Joe Lopez. She finds him as he is changing from his scrubs to his everyday clothes.

"Uh Joe can I talk to you in private?" Ruth looks at the tired doctor.

"I was getting ready to go home Ruth."

"I know but this is about Noah and it is really important."

"Sure let just finish changing and I will meet you outside."

"Thanks Joe."

Ruth walks out to the small lounge area that is meant for doctors only and waits for Joe. She knows this is going to be one of the hardest conversations she has ever had about her son. She thought she would never have to know if her son was pregnant.

"Hey Ruth. I just have a few minutes to spare. I haven't been home in what feels like days." Joe smiles at the frazzled mother. He wonders for a moment if she knows about her son and his special 'problem'.

"This won't take long Joe. Is Noah pregnant?" Ruth isn't in the mood to make pleasant conversation. She has to prepare herself and her son for what could be.

"So you know about the RYT gene Noah carries."

"Yes. I have known since he was born. His father was a carrier."

"The test results were inconclusive Ruth. In all honesty with a result like that in a case like this, I would say the odds are…Yes that he is pregnant. The CCD camera showed that he has a fallopian tube that is connected to an ovary full of eggs.

I cant say that I am sorry if he is because of the scientific ramifications for us/the hospital. But I know to be pregnant by your rapist is going to be the second most difficult thing he has to face, the first being the rape itself." Joe is frank with the strong woman sitting in front of him.

"Did you tell him or anyone else about this Joe?"

"I only told Roger Dunham. He noticed the request for a pregnancy test on a male patient. But I asked that he keep this to himself and he agreed to do it. Ruth what are you going to do? Are you going to tell Noah now or wait and let him heal some from the rape first?"

"Until you can say positively tell me that he is pregnant I am not going to tell him. I think it would send him over the edge right now and I would lose my son to suicide. I heard it in his voice earlier and I am not ready to lose my son." Ruth closes her eyes and says a silent prayer.

"Ruth bring him back in for a check up in a month. We can retest him then and know for sure. Until then if you need anything, someone to talk to I am here." Joe hold her hand for minute.

"Thanks Joe. I will make sure he comes in and I may just take you up on that offer. But for now I am going to do my best to forget about this conversation." Ruth stands and heads back to her surgical floor, the weight of the world on her shoulders.

Joe watches Ruth leave and his heart goes out to the single mother. She was one of the strongest women he had ever met. She kept her cool in the operating room and in her personal life. She did her best to give her children the best she could and every chance she got she bettered herself. He knew he would do whatever she asked when it came to Noah. Joe heads home to his wife and his daughter.

Carole took the boys and Sarah back to the Hudmel house stopping to pick up some Chinese take out for everyone. Calling Burt she said that she would explain everything once she got home but that Noah and Sarah were spending the night. She dropped the boys off with the food while she and Sarah went back to the Puckerman home to pick up clothes and backpacks for the kids.

Burt watched the strange interaction between Finn and Noah. The tall teen would not let the Jewish boy out of his sight and he seemed to have to be touching him all the time. A hand on his back, letting his body lean against the dark teen's and the brushing of his knuckles against Noah's hand. It almost seemed intimate to Burt.

Dinner was served once Carole and Sarah came back. Burt watched everyone at the table and could not figure out what had happened but he knew from the nervous chatter and the quiet Noah that it wasn't good. The adult excused themselves to the bonus room with Sarah so she could watch a movie and the boys headed to Finn's room.

Once the door closed behind Finn he watched as Noah headed for the bathroom with the extra clothes Carole brought back. Finn could hear the shower start and the stall door closing a moment later. He used to time alone to text Dave and Santana letting them know what had happened and that Noah was okay. Both threatened his life if he didn't let them know sooner when something happened with Noah.

Noah stepped out of the bathroom in clean sweats and a wife beater. Finn looked at the dark skinned teen seeing the slump in his shoulders, the guarded expression that clouded his features. Finn motioned at the Xbox but Noah shook his head no and went to curl up on the bed instead. He watched Noah pull his knees up to his chin as he sat back against the headboard. He looked so small like that, so different than the badass jock Finn was used to seeing.

Finn used that moment to sit in front of Noah blocking any escape for the frightened teen. He wanted, no, he needed to talk to Noah about how he felt. About how much he loved his best friend and that no matter what he always would love him.

"Noah I love you."

"No you don't, you just feel sorry for me Finn."

"No I love you. I don't feel sorry for you. I do but that is not why I love you."

"Yes it is Finn. You want to make me feel better. You want to _help_ me. You want me to talk about _it_."

"No I don't want to talk about _it_. I want to talk about us."

"There is no us, Finn. There never was."

"But there could be Noah. And I want it to happen."

"No you don't. You don't want to be with someone that is dirty, used like me." Noah looks away from Finn.

"You keep saying that you're dirty and I don't understand. I know I am slow sometimes but I don't understand how you feel that way."

"Just let it go Finn."

"No. I want to understand. I want to know what makes you feel that way. Is it me?" Finn is afraid of the answer.

"Yes. No. It's me and what he did to me. Just stop Finn." Noah just wants to stop talking.

"No not until you explain it to me."

"Why so you can feel even more sorry for me?" The anger and hurt is loud and clear in Noah's voice.

"Goddammit! Noah! I love you! Help me to understand! Please!" Finn hates this argument. He just wants to know so he won't feel so stupid and wrong wanting to touch Noah, to kiss him.

"Did you know that I have loved you since middle school. I would think about what our life would be like after high school. We would leave this stupid cow town and go to college together. Our own apartment, just you and me. Maybe get a dog.

Then we would graduate. Have really good jobs that made a lot of money and get married. We would go to work each morning after I made breakfast. And we would come home talk about our day while I cooked dinner. Afterwards we always snuggled up on the couch watching a movie. And then we would go to bed. I didn't understand about sex then but I do now. That dream is gone for me. It was over the other night at the party.

I have sold my body for money to help my Ma pay the bills, so Sarah could take dance lessons or whatever she wanted to do. Sometimes the money made sure we had a roof over our heads. I have slept with so many different women/girls but I never slept with a guy. That one little piece of myself I tried to save for you is gone.

Every part of my body has been used now Finn in some way for sex. It doesn't matter if I wanted it to happen or not; nothing is left of me that hasn't been used. I'm dirty because nothing is left for you or me. Somebody has used me or I have used myself with them.

No matter how many showers I take, how many times I brush my teeth, wash my hair I can still feel them what I did with them. And now I can feel him inside of me hurting me, killing me." Noah looks at Finn with dead eyes. Where there was once a bright sparkle of life is now dull and lifeless.

"Did you ever give them, any of them, your heart?"

"No. You are the only person I have ever loved that way." Noah wants Finn to hold him to make it all go away but he can't, no one can do that.

"Then give me your heart when you are ready. The rest doesn't matter." Finn reaches out for Noah's hand pulling it into his own.

"Yes it does matter. The first time you want to have sex it will matter Finn." Noah can feel the warmth of Finn's hand, the way Finn's thumb is rubbing the back of his darker one.

"No it won't because we will be making love, not just having sex Noah."

"I don't know what the difference is Finn. Sex has always been just that sex; using my body as a means to an end. I don't know if I can separate them." He still wants that dream.

"We can learn together Noah. We can figure all of this out together. Just give us a chance Noah. You are not dirty to me or used either. Everything with you is new and if you have never loved anyone like this then it will be new for you too." Finn, using the hand he is holding pulls Noah to him gently cupping his face with his other hand. Letting his thumb brush lightly across the dark cheek he gently kisses Noah's forehead hearing the smaller boy whimper at the touch.

"Finn, please…."

Finn slowly captures Noah's lips in a soft kiss, his lips fitting the dark teen's perfectly. He waits a moment before pulling slightly back looking at Noah through hooded eyes seeing a tear slip slowly down the teen's cheek. Dark hazel eyes stare back at him through soft damp lashes.

Noah wants the dream, he wants the boy that just kissed him. His first kiss out of love and it terrifies him because he didn't feel dirty, just loved. He holds onto Finn's hand, gripping it like he could slip away.

The strangled cry is soft against Finn's lips… "Finn I love you, please…help me."

The next kiss is just as tender and chaste between the boys but it speaks louder than any words between them.

There is hope for them.


	8. I Won't Let You Down

_A major thank you to all the reviews and the alerts! This story is becoming more difficult to write because of the emotions of the characters….But fear not as I, Hemmy of the Southern Hedge, will continue forth…Okay now that I got the theatrics out of the way. This has been an intense story so far and I am afraid it will continue to be one. So please contribute your thoughts and reviews as they are much appreciated! Rain thank you for all your help and love! And to BlackDiamon welcome my friend! I enjoy your work too! Peace Hemmy_

**Chapter 8**

**I Won't Let You Down**

Finn and Noah share a few more tender chaste kisses. Noah had finally calmed down enough so that Finn could wrap his arms around him. Finn slowly slips one of his arms under Noah's legs pulling him onto his a guy was so different than holding a girl, yet holding a trembling frightened Noah made him feel like Noah belonged in his arms.

Noah's head is resting on his shoulder. He can feel the darker jocks breathing becoming more even. Finn gently rests his cheek against the soft stubble beside the slightly longer hair of Noah's 'hawk. The tentative way that Noah wraps his arms around his waist snuggling deeper into the embrace makes Finn's heart fill with a rush of emotions and memories.

_I remember the first time I ever held you, it was the day your Dad left. Your Mom called my Mom begging her to bring me over, that she couldn't handle you, that she couldn't stop you from hurting yourself. _

_I found you beating your fists against that Oak tree that used to be in your backyard. You were screaming at your Dad to come back. That you would be good, that you promised to be good. When I pulled you away from the tree you were crying and your hands were bloody from the rough bark of the tree. _

_I remember your eyes the most, the way they looked so big, so scared, so hurt. You hugged me so tight asking me why? Was it your fault? What did you do that was so wrong?. I hugged you back, holding on to you as we both sat down by the tree. I kept telling you it wasn't your fault. That you didn't do anything wrong._

_We both cried that day over our dads. I cried for a man that I never knew, that a war I didn't understand took from me. You cried for a Dad that just walked away. We told each other that it would always be us the two of us, 'us against the world' and that was the first time I told you I loved you. You smiled at me and said it back to me. I think I have always known that I love you, I just never wanted to admit it. _

Finn is pulled from his thoughts when Noah shifts in his arms. Looking down at the boy in his arms he finds Noah sleeping, softly snoring. He carefully moves Noah under the covers of the large bed kissing his cheek.

Noah opens his eyes for a moment reaching out for Finn.

"I'm going to shower really fast and then I will hold you again. Okay?" Finn watches the slight nod of Noah's head as his eyes droop heavier. Finn stands and heads to take the quickest shower he can, he doesn't like leaving Noah alone.

The shower was just that quick. Finn made sure he was clean but he didn't lounge in the shower singing or jacking off like usual. He wanted Noah back in his arms. Once he is dried off and wearing pajama bottoms and a tee shirt he walks back into the room letting Noah know that is laying down in the bed. He lays down careful not to make any sudden movements. He gently tugs Noah onto his chest letting the Jewish teen curl around his body. Noah lays his head on Finn's chest wrapping his arm around the taller teen's waist and before the night is over they are curled up together with legs tangled as well.

CB CB CB CB CB CB CB

Carole and Burt walk into the kitchen after checking on the kids. Sarah was sleeping in Kurt's room after watching Deadliest Catch and a couple of episodes of Degrassi. When the couple opened Finn's bedroom door Burt almost lost it. Carole whispered that she would explain downstairs and not to wake up the boys. What Burt Hummel saw was two boys holding onto each other like lovers in his oldest son's bed. Needless to say his head felt like it was going to explode.

Carole knows she has a lot of explaining to do with Burt and she doesn't know if he is ready for another gay son. She walks to the kitchen table and sits down motioning for Burt to sit down.

"So what in the blue hell is going on Carole! Puckerman looks like hell! Finn looks like someone ran over his new puppy! And that little girl looks scared out of her mind! And I just walk into my _straight_ son's room and find him and Puckerman wrapped around each other. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?" Burt hates to yell but right now something is wrong and no one has told him a damn thing.

"Something really bad happened to Noah." Tears begin to form in Carole's eyes as she swallows back the lump forming in her throat. "The boy's went to a party while we were gone and some sick son of a bitch raped Noah."

Burt can't believe his ears. The Puckerman kid raped? The toughest of Finn's friends raped? Burt feels sick to his stomach, the one thing that he was afraid would happen to Kurt happened to Puckerman. He looks at Carole trying to understand.

"I took him to the hospital tonight. The bastard hurt him, tore him on the inside. He has been hurting for almost a week and the only people that knew were Finn, Santana, and Dave Karofsky." Carole doesn't get to finish as Burt roars.

"The bastard that bullied Kurt? Is he the one that..did that….to Puckerman? I'll kill the bastard!" Burt is up out of the chair so fast that it falls backwards.

"Burt calm down. No he isn't the one that raped Noah. He has been helping Finn to take care of Noah. It seems that they are friends now. Dave has been keeping Noah together at school along with Santana. It seems they are protecting Noah as well as protecting the students from Noah's mood swings." Carole had a hard time believing it until Noah told her it was true.

Burt walks over to the side kitchen cabinet and pulls out a bottle of Jack Daniels and two glasses. He pours one and downs it quickly. He then refills the glass and pours Carole a shot too. "What else don't I know? I feel like there is more to this fucked up mess."

"Ruth was in the room when they examined Noah at the ER and now he doesn't trust her. She helped them to sedate him. We never allow parents in the trauma rooms for that reason, it makes the parent out to be the bad guy. So Ruth asked if Noah and Sarah could stay with us while she is at work. She is terrified that he is going to try to…" Carole's voice hitches in her throat. "To try and commit suicide." Carole drinks the whiskey in gulp.

"What do you think Carole? Do you think he would try to kill himself?" Burt is now afraid for the teen's life. He could only guess how or what the Puckerman kid was feeling. He really didn't want to think about how he would feel if the roles were reversed.

"I have known Noah since he was little. I know when his father left it almost destroyed him and when he had to give up Beth that did destroy a part of him. I don't know if this will finish the process or not. Noah is strong but he is also just as fragile. So I really don't know." Carole can feel the tears slipping down her cheeks. "And there is something else. Noah could be pregnant. He carries the RYT gene and Finn said that the rapist didn't use a condom. I think if he doesn't want to kill himself now, he will if he IS pregnant."

Burt stands and grabs the bottle off the counter and pours them another shot each placing the bottle between them. "I have read the information about male carriers on the net. I wanted to make sure I knew about all the possibilities Kurt could face being gay. The information said that it was extremely rare. How do you know Puck is a carrier?"

"Ruth and I used to plan their wedding when they were little. We knew back then that those two loved each other deeper than friendship. It was as if they were made for each other. Noah always stood up for Finn when the other kids picked on him about not having a father. And Finn was the only one that could comfort Noah when he was hurt. They were always together, being there for each other. We even caught them saying 'love you' at night when they would have sleepovers. It never bothered me that my son is gay or bisexual. And it never bothered Ruth that Noah loved Finn.

As the boys got older and we knew they would become curious about each other's bodies, Ruth told me about the gene. Her husband was a carrier and when Noah was born she had him tested for the gene. Ruth had hoped it would skip Noah's generation but it didn't. The boys don't know about the gene or the possibility of Noah being pregnant and I am not going to tell Finn until we know that it is true.

And this needs to be kept between us. All of this needs to be kept quiet as possible. I don't want you to tell Kurt either. Noah doesn't want to be treated any differently and he doesn't need to be. And I'm sorry Burt, but Kurt loves to gossip and that is the last thing Noah needs right now."

Burt swallows the whiskey he poured and looks at his beautiful wife. "I won't say anything Carole. I promise. I would not want anyone to talk about me either. God what kind of sick freak would do that to a kid? I mean raping a man takes away his dignity, his pride. It would make me feel less of a man."

Carole is surprised by the honest insight her husband has of the situation. She knew there was a reason she fell in love with Burt Hummel. She places her hand on top of his and smiles at him.

"I'm glad that you understand. It's going to be a long and hard road for Noah. He is going to need love and support from all of us." Carole squeezes her husband's hand.

"Carole I will do whatever I can to help the boy. He didn't deserve this. No one does." Burt reassures his wife.

"How did I get so lucky having you for a husband? I must have done something right."

"I feel the same way babe." Burt kisses his wife's hand. They head to bed after discussing the after effects of the rape so Burt would know what to expect from Noah's behavior.

Ruth picks up Sarah in the morning after Carole asks her to let Finn take him to school. Noah needed time to forgive his mother and Carole said she would talk to him. Ruth agreed and thanked Carole and Burt for their help with the kids and she told Sarah while they were standing in the Hudmel kitchen that she was to ride the bus to the Hudmel home for the rest of the week; that she would pick them up in the mornings before school.

Burt left after Ruth, heading for the garage. He had a lot on his mind and he really wasn't sure how he wanted to deal with it. Burt wasn't sure how he felt about Finn and Puckerman, not that he was against them being gay, but more about why it took something so harsh to make them realize they loved each other. He decided to talk to Finn about it.

The boys came down after everyone but Carole had left. Noah did not want a confrontation with his mother and Finn really wasn't sure how Burt was going to take him suddenly being gay or at least bisexual.

"Noah, I talked to Burt last night and told him what was going on and what happened to you." Carole watches as Noah flinches at her words. "He won't tell anyone, not even Kurt. He also said that he would help you in any way he can."

"Thanks Mom. I know he had to be told it just doesn't make it any easier to deal with, that's all." Noah grabs a bowl of cereal from Finn. "Is he okay with me staying here?"

"Yes and that you are welcome here as long as you need a place to stay." Carole pours the boys some orange juice taking it to the table for them.

"Is Burt going to be okay with me and Noah seeing each other? Did you tell him that I love Noah?" Finn looks at his mom uncertainty in his eyes. He heard the choking sound from Noah, looking at the dark teen he notices milk running out of his nose.

Carole grabs a dishtowel for Noah to wipe the milk from his face as Finn stares at his boyfriend. Noah is coughing trying to compose himself after the milk stops coming out of his nose. He takes the cloth from Carole knowing that his face is a dark red from embarrassment.

"Yes and he is okay with it. I think he is just a little wierded out about everything. It is a lot to take in all at once honey." Carole smiles at the boys. "Ruth and I have always known and accepted it."

"Can we talk about something else? Please?" Noah pleads with Carole.

"Do you guys have Glee after school today?" Carole knows that it is embarrassing to talk in front of your parents about your boyfriend no matter how old you are.

"Um..Yeah I think so." Finn scratches his head trying to remember their schedule.

"We do Mom. Do we need to pick up Sarah?" Noah worries about his little sister, she should never have seen him like that yesterday. He was suppose to protect her not scare her.

"No thanks boys. Burt is looking forward to doing that. I think he said something about ice cream or some kind of treat." Carole laughs at the thought of Burt spoiling that girl. "She is going to be so spoilt. I think he always wanted to have another child, a little girl."

The boys laugh at the thought of Burt spoiling Sarah. Truth be told Noah had always spoiled her when he could afford it.

"You guys better get going you don't want to be late for school. Love you both." Carole hugs and kisses each son on the cheek. She watches as a small smile tugs at Noah's lips as they walk out the back door.

NP NP NP NP

The ride to school is quiet as they both ponder being a couple. Neither one was ready to come out to the school but they really didn't want to hide it either. Finn is the first to say something.

"So are we a couple Noah? I mean are we a couple at school?" Finn parks the car away from the other cars so they can talk for a minute.

"I'm not ready for that Finn. I love you but everything that we put Kurt through won't be shit compared to what they are going to do to us. We are suppose to be the football jocks, the tough guys, so they will make it more violent for us." Noah looks out of the window at the dark skies threatening rain. "I don't want you getting hurt Finn. I know I couldn't handle that right now. I don't think I would be able to keep my promise if you were hurt because of me."

Finn hearing the honesty in Noah's voice and words understood completely. He knew Noah was fighting just to keep the promise and to give them a chance at a relationship.

"I love you too Noah and I know I couldn't handle it right now if something else happened to you. So we keep it to ourselves and we stay true to each other. Okay?" Finn grabs Noah's hand holding on to it.

"I don't want anyone else Finn, just you. You don't have to worry about me. And don't go getting jealous if you see me and Dave together. I like having him around me, but as a friend only. He told me to let you help me heal, he encouraged me to give us a chance. So be nice to him and stop threatening to kill him every time you see him. And I promise I won't get jealous of Berry trying to get back into your pants." Noah looks up at Finn lacing his fingers through the larger teens.

"You know I don't want Rachel. And I will stop trying to drive Dave away from you. I trust you Noah. Come on before Satan comes after us." Finn quickly kisses the back of Noah's hand before grabbing his backpack stepping out of the car. Noah gets out of the passenger door just as Satan pops up.

"The next time you go into the hospital you better call me and let me know what the fuck is going on!" Santana hisses at Noah and Finn both. "I was so worried about you and my Dad came home last night telling my mom about this teenager who I knew was you."

"San let it go! He doesn't need this right now!" Dave growls at the Latina. He was scared too but the look in Puck's eyes was telling him that he was close to losing it and didn't want to talk about it. "Come on we better get inside."

The day goes as usual. Several nerds go for dumpster dives and Puck slushies someone for the first time in a year and a half. But in all fairness Jewfro deserved it for asking if either he or Finn had a used pair of Rachel's panties. Finn wanted to punch him just for asking it in front of Puck.

After the last bell rings they head for the choir room. When they arrive they all notice Azimio and the jocks from the fight are in the room along with the rest of the Gleeks. Mr. Shue was trying to keep a fight from breaking out between Rachel and Azimio over who had the right to be there. Miss Pillsbury was standing by the white board trying to stay out of the melee.

"This is your fault Puckerman! We wouldn't be in here if you hadn't started the fight!" Azimio tries to shove Puck but Dave steps in between them.

"That's bullshit and you know it Z." Dave has his fists balled up ready to hit his best friend if need be. Dave is not going to let anyone hurt Puck. "You started it and now YOU NEEDTO DROP IT!"

Azimio stares at his friend and wonders what the hell is it going to take to get him back on the straight side. The only time Dave ever defends anyone is when he honestly cares about them. _What the hell has Puckerman done to him? I knew the gay rubs off on people! _"Whatever dude. I see how it is now. They spilt the damn gay Petri dish on you. Fucking Homo's."

The room erupts then. No one had been holding Puck at that point and he just went off, punching Azimio repeatedly before Dave and Finn could pull him off. Which set off a chain of motion. Sam and Mike joined in punching the other jocks as Santana slapped one. Finn punched Azimio the moment Dave pulled Puck off and the fight intensified to epic proportions.

Finn had never felt such anger as he did the moment he saw Azimio land a punch to Puck's eye knocking him backwards for a moment. He could feel the power of his own punches as he hit Azimio in the gut and ribs. Dave was trying to separate them after pushing Puck back away from the fight.

Rachel was riding the back of one of the jocks trying to choke him while Mercedes was threatening to cut the white boy while hitting him with a text book. Tina had kicked the jock in the shins that was fighting Mike. Brittany and Quinn each punched the one jock that was fighting Sam. Santana had kneed the one jock she had slapped yelling triumphantly as he fell to the ground, "that how we do it in Lima Heights bitch!"

Coach Sylvester appeared in the doorway and began to help Will pull the fighting teens apart.

"What the hell people? Isn't this the reason you are all in here? Because you were fighting over who is gay?" Coach Sylvester demands answers from the disgruntled jocks and Gleeks.

"Come on guys! I don't understand why you all cant get along for just a five minutes without someone throwing a punch! I'm sick and tired of all this fighting! Emma, Miss Pillsbury, tried to help you guys by setting this up!" Will turns to find the ginger haired woman in question holding on to Noah Puckerman, keeping him from joining back in the fight. Will can't believe his eyes.

Everyone else seems to notice what Will is looking at as well. It more or less helps to stop the last bit of struggling between the two different groups. Emma Pillsbury has her arms wrapped around Puck keeping him still without any freak out or sanitizer. And Noah Puckerman is letting her keep him still.

"Everyone take your seats! And we are going to try this again!" Will demands of the students. Coach Sylvester sits at the side of the room giving Will back up if he needs it.

"Will I am going to take Noah to my office. I think we need to have a discussion about all of this in private." Emma doesn't wait for Will's response as she pulls Noah from the room. Will can only stare at the strange duo leaving the room.

FP FP FP FP FP

Noah follows Miss P. he knows how she reacted to him wasn't her usual style so he let's her have her way at the moment. He wonders what is going on with the red head, she actually touched him for more than a second without having a melt down.

They reach her office and she offers him a seat as she sits behind her desk. She doesn't reach for any of her cleaning products, she simply looks at him. It was like she was waiting for him to talk… They stare at each other for a moment before she speaks to him…

"Noah, Puck, I know that something terrible has happened to you. I know that you feel like there is no one that understands you, but I do. I heard what you said in the choir room the other day, about how you couldn't stop him. I know those words Noah. I know what they mean." Emma stops to take a breath looking at Noah's face trying to read his emotions. She continues when he looks straight at her.

"I was a victim of rape too. It happened in my freshman year of college. This really cute guy asked to show me around campus during orientation. I didn't even know his last name but I let him lead me around, showing me all the different buildings. I even let him hold my hand, I thought he was being sweet until we got back to my dorm room." Emma has never told anyone but her therapist about the rape, not even Will. She collects her emotions and continues.

"He pushed his way into my room as soon as I opened the door. I tried to make him leave but he was so much bigger than me. He grabbed me saying I owed him for the tour and he began to kiss me. He raped me after that, I tried to fight but I was so scared that all I did was lay there while he took my…innocence away from me." She sees the tears threatening to spill from Noah's eyes and stands closing the blinds. Emma can feel her own tears slipping down her cheeks. She walks over to Noah and sits beside him in the other chair.

"I know that you feel like it is your fault but it isn't Noah. You did not asked to be raped, to have something taken away from you." She watches as the dark teen's shoulders begin to shake as he covers his face with his hands. Emma gently rubs his back trying to sooth him, he leans into her.

Noah had always known there was a reason Miss. P was so neat and after listening to her he knew why. She felt dirty just like he does. Yet she is not freaking out and she is touching him. He looks up at her green eyes and seeing her tears decides he can trust her. He starts talking to her.

"Does it ever stop hurting? Do the nightmares ever stop?" Noah asks his voice cracking from the sobs.

"I honestly don't know. I still have nightmares sometimes. And all of you know that I have a cleaning problem, I always feel dirty if someone touches me. I don't want that to happen to you. You need to find someone to talk to, someone that can help you deal with this professionally." She reaches to pick up a card off her desk and hands it to Noah. "Diane is a friend of mine and she is a licensed therapist. I wouldn't recommend her if I didn't think she could help you."

Noah hands the card back to Emma. "I don't want to talk to a stranger. I trust you Miss P. but I'm not ready to talk to anyone else." Noah looks at the sad expression that crosses her face. "Can I ask you something Miss P without freaking you out or you calling my Ma?"

"Whatever you say to me Noah I promise you will stay in this room."

"Did you ever want to kill yourself?" Noah is staring at his shoes when the quiet words come before he can stop them.

Emma's heart hit's the floor. She had been hoping that his mental state wasn't that bad, that far gone.

When Emma doesn't answer him, Noah keeps on talking.

"I think it would be so much easier if it was over. I wouldn't have the nightmares, I wouldn't feel sick when someone touches me. I wouldn't be a burden to my friends. I wouldn't feel him or hear him every time I am alone. It could be over for everyone, no more worrying about me." Noah's voice is so distant and small. "Finn would find someone else to love. Someone that isn't used up like me."

Emma grabs Noah's face in her hands jerking it up to look at her.

"Noah Puckerman don't you ever think that committing suicide is the easy way out! You would destroy your family! Your friends! I know you are hurting and that you just want it to stop! But if you do that you will only make it worse for the people that love you! They wont understand why you did it! Why you left them behind!" Emma is almost shouting at Noah. "And the person that raped you would win! He did this to you to have power over you and if you kill yourself then you are giving him the absolute power he craves! Rape isn't about sex, it is about power! DON'T LET HIM WIN NOAH!"

Noah breaks hearing her words. He latches on to her crying into her shoulder telling her everything that happened to him the night of the party and who raped him. He makes her promise not to tell anyone who it was and tells her what his attacker said to him during the rape.

Emma is stunned at first and then becomes furious. She wants to pick up her phone and call the police so the son of a bitch could be arrested and thrown in jail. She knows she has to keep her promise to Noah though, even if it means letting a rapist go free. She knows she has to do something.

"Noah I want you to come to see me everyday, even if it is just to say hi. You can talk to me if you need to and I will never judge you. If you want to talk about the rape we can. If you just want to talk about the weather that's fine too. But you need to know that someone understands what you are going through and I need to make sure that you are as okay as you can be. Can you do that for me?" Emma is afraid for the young jock. He basically told her he wanted to commit suicide.

"Yeah. I can do that for you. I know I need help but I think you do too. Who knows maybe we can help each other." Noah looks at the petite woman. It felt strange talking to someone else that had been raped but it felt good too.

"So are you ready to put some ice on that shiner?" Emma touches his cheek looking at the black circle forming around his eye. "And off the record I think you could have taken Adams."

Noah smiles at her, "thanks Miss P"

They walk out of her office and head to the nurse's desk to retrieve an ice pack for Noah's shiner. Then they walk back to the choir room.

FP FP FP FP FP FP FP

After the strange exit of Emma and Puck, Will tried again to hand out the sheet music they would performing at the Assembly. Once the sheet music was passed out and another argument was averted by Sue, Will began to show them some dance moves. Azimio was the loudest objector to the freakishly gay music and there was no way he was dancing like a fairy in front of the whole school. Finn was the first to say something.

"So I guess you would rather look like a dumbass in front of the whole school while the rest of us sing and dance?" Finn snarls at the homophobic jock.

"I have had enough out of you Hudson. First you turn my boy Dave gay and now you're trying to turn me gay! One more comment and I am going to break your jaw!" Azimio challenges Finn pointing his finger at his face.

"I have heard enough of this crap for one afternoon. Frankenteen go stand over there." Sue is pointing to the other side of the room. "And you fat boy! Let me tell you something about bigotry, because that is what you are spewing! African-Americans have faced bigotry over the color of their skin far longer than Homosexuals have over who they love.

Martin Luther King had a dream of EVERYONE being treated equally and he included gays in that inspiring and life changing speech! He didn't say everyone but…He said EVERYONE! You may not like their life style but they have just as much right as you or me to live a life as they see fit!

SO SHUT YOUR MOUTH! LEARN THE SONG AND THE DANCE STEPS! BECAUSE YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE HERE TRYING TO OPPRESS ANYONE ADAMS!" Sue had backed Azimio against the wall during her rant. Sue believed in equal rights for everyone and Martin Luther King was one of her favorite speakers on equality. She walks back over to her chair and sits calmly back down. "Continue William before the fumes from your hair incite another riot."

Azimio is stunned to say the least. No one had ever backed him into a corner like that and he knew that speech by heart cause his grandmother had made him learn it. His family was proud of their heritage. But it still didn't change his mind about Puck or what was happening with Dave. He decides to play along because he was honestly afraid of Sue Sylvester. Azimio takes his place in the line.

The rest of rehearsal goes well other than the absence of Puck and Emma. After the jocks are dismissed and Rachel decides to sing a song dedicated to Finn, Puck and Emma walk back into the room.

Once Puck is back in the room and hears Rachel's performance he asks if he can sing to someone. Will nods as Emma sits next to him. Puck walks over to Brad and whispers the title of the song to him and the rest of the band. He grabs Artie's electric and stands in front of the room. Looking at Finn…

"I know we said this morning that we would hide who we are, what we are to each other and I thought I was cool with that but I'm not. Talking with Miss P helped me decide to do this, to sing to you. It's how I am feeling."

When Puck strikes the first chords on the electric Santana motions for Brittany to join her backing her best friend up. _the girls sing the parts in parenthesis_

_Hey, slow it down whataya want from me_

_Whataya want from me_

_Yeah I'm afraid whataya want from me_

_Whataya want from me_

_There might have been a time_

_And I would give myself awayO_

_ooh once upon a time I didn't give a damn_

_But now, here we are so whataya want from me_

_Whataya want from me_

_Just don't give up I'm workin it out_

_Please don't give in, I won't let you down_

_It messed me up, need a second to breathe_

_Just keep coming around_

_Hey, whataya want from me_

_Whataya want from me_

_Whataya want from me_

_Yeah, it's plain to see (plain to see)_

_that baby you're beautiful_

_And it's nothing wrong with you(nothing wrong with you)_

_It's me, I'm a freak (yeah)_

_but thanks for lovin' me_

_Cause you're doing it perfectly(it perfectly)_

_There might have been a time_

_When I would let you step away_

_I wouldn't even try_

_But I think you could save my life_

_Just don't give up I'm workin' it out_

_Please don't give in, I won't let you down_

_It messed me up, need a second to breathe_

_Just keep comin around_

_Hey, whataya want from me (Whataya want from me)_

_Whataya want from me (Whataya want from me)_

_Just don't give up on me_

_(uuuuuuh) I won't let you down_

_No, I won't let you down_

_(So I) just don't give up_

_I'm workin it out_

_Please don't give in, I won't let you down_

_It messed me up (It messed me up)_

_Need a second to breathe_

_Just keep coming around_

_Hey, whataya want from me_

_Just don't give up I'm workin' it out_

_Please don't give in, i won't let you down_

_It messed me up, need a second to breathe_

_Just keep coming around_

_Hey, whataya want from me (whataya want from me)_

_whataya want from me (whataya want from me)whataya want from me_

Finn listens to the words of the song and understands what Puck is telling him. When the last note is played he walks to his boyfriend and wiping away the tears that had managed to escape his beautiful dark hazel eyes kissing him in front of the Glee club. "I'm not going anywhere Noah."

A/N: Whataya Want From Me is by Adam Lambert

I love his music :D


	9. Conspiracy Of A Necessary Evil

_This chapter involves all of the Gleeks. Please let me know if you find anyone of them out of character. I tried my best. Thanks to Rain for helping me with the title. It is quite appropriate. Please review and as always thank you for all the reviews and the alerts! Love Hemmy_

**Chapter 9**

**Conspiracy Of A Necessary Evil**

The choir room erupts as Finn kisses the fragile boy in front of them. Noah wraps his arms around Finn clinging to the taller teen.

"I'm sorry but I heard Rachel singing to you and I couldn't stop myself from telling you how I feel. I have loved you for so long that it scares me. I'm afraid you will walk away from me. Get tired of having to deal with me and all this bullshit drama I am going through." Noah tells Finn through ragged breaths his chest feeling like it was going to explode. He buries his face in the familiar chest letting Finn chase away the chaos surrounding them.

Dave and Santana stand in front of the couple that are lost in each other. Both teens ready to fight for their friends and it might just come to that with a couple of them.

Rachel sat stunned in her seat for a moment, not full comprehending what or who Noah was singing about until she watched Finn get up from his chair and walk to Noah kissing him in front of everyone. She had never felt so betrayed in her life. The man she had professed to love was in love with Noah Puckerman.

"Okay where are the cameras? I know this is some kind of sick joke! Did you plan this Karofsky?" Rachel looks around the room for anything out of place.

Dave flips Rachel off and watches the reactions of the gleeks.

Quinn is just sitting with her mouth hanging open as she watches two of her ex-boyfriends kiss declaring their hearts to each other. Pure hatred and fury boils in her veins as she watches Finn hold Noah close telling him it is going to be okay. She closes her mouth and walks calmly down to the front of the room to stand in front of Santana and Dave.

"MOVE OUT OF THE WAY!" Quinn yells at the two standing guard.

"No way Quinn! You are not going to mess up this moment for them!" Santana stands ready to fight with her hands clenched into fists.

"You need to go and sit back down Fabray!" Dave growls at her pointing at a chair.

"What makes you think I am going to do what you say asshole?" Quinn glares at the towering jock.

"Because if you don't I am going to let Satan here rip you apart." Dave smiles at her. "And believe me when I say she won't show you any mercy when it comes to Puck and neither will I!" He takes a step towards her.

Quinn sits back down still snarling at the two boys still holding on to each other.

Artie, Mike, and Sam just stare at the boys and their guards like they are something out of a sci-fi movie that they just cant quite comprehend. Tina and Brittany smile at the boys.

Mercedes is the next one up out of her chair. "What in hell is going on? Since when are the two white boys macking for each other?"

"Guys. Guys! I think everyone needs to calm down!" Will looks at Emma with questioning eyes. "Everyone please sit down!" He yells as Emma walks to the choir room door and slams it shut getting everyone's attention.

"SIT DOWN NOW!" Emma shouts at the group of teenagers with such force that Will even sits back down. Brad the piano guy smiles from ear to ear. _About damn time Ginger!_

She walks over to Noah and Finn smiling at them. She motions for them to take a seat and watches as Santana and Dave sit on either side of the couple.

"Now I know that some of you are concerned about this new development but I will not tolerate any negativity towards them! You may each have a turn speaking to the new couple. You may ask them questions or you may make comments about what you are feeling. But YOU WILL NOT USE ANY SEXUAL SLURS OR MAKE ANY RUDE COMMENTS ABOUT THEM!" Emma smiles at the disgruntled group of teenagers. "Rachel you may go first and remember what I said, no slurs or anything rude."

"Thank you Miss Pillsbury." Rachel looks at Finn. "I don't understand Finn. You told me that you still loved me when we broke up, that you just couldn't trust me anymore. I can't understand how you could say that and now you are in love with Noah! We made out, I let you touch my breasts! So how can you be gay?" She is close to losing the little control she has over her emotions.

"Where you ever really in love with me Finn? Did you think about Noah when you were with me? I would have known if you are gay! I have two gay fathers! I would have known! This is some kind of cruel joke isn't it? A cruel joke just to make me feel bad over Blaine!" Rachel is looking at Finn with disgust in her eyes

"No Rach this isn't some kind of joke. I really love Noah and I have for a very long time. Since we were little. And yes Rachel I did love you just not the same way I love Noah. The only people that knew we loved each other was our mothers. They knew before we did." Finn takes Noah's hand in his, offering him support and comfort.

Quinn stands next. "I don't believe you! Either one of you! You both slept with me! You both told me that you loved me! We had a child together Puck! You have slept with every Cheerio on the squad! Hell with most of the women when you were cleaning their pools! YOU CANNOT BE GAY! BOTH OF MY EX-BOYFRIENDS CANNOT BE GAY!" The fury in her voice is matched only with the feeling of being a failure. Being a beard for them. "How long have the two of you been together? Did you enjoy making a fool out of me? Out of Rachel?"

Puck looks at Quinn with hard eyes. "YOU MADE ME A FOOL QUINN! HOW LONG DID IT TAKE YOU TO ADMIT THAT I WAS THE FATHER OF BETH? OH THAT'S RIGHT YOU DIDN'T UNTIL RACHEL FIGURED IT OUT AND TOLD FINN! THIS ISN'T ABOUT YOU! THIS ISN'T ABOUT YOUR PERFECT REPUTATION BEING RUINED!

I SLEPT WITH ALL THOSE GIRLS/WOMEN TO PROVE THAT I WASN'T GAY TO MYSELF! WHEN I SLEPT WITH YOU IT WAS BECAUSE YOU WANTED IT! BECAUSE RACHEL WAS CHASING AFTER FINN! YOU THOUGHT HE CHEATED ON YOU WITH RACHEL! _**YOU**_ DID IT TO GET BACK AT FINN! SO YOU DON'T GET TO PLAY THE FOOL'S CARD CAUSE YOU PLAYED IT TWO YEARS AGO!" Puck takes a deep breath. He looks at Finn who is turning red faced with anger.

"NOAH IS RIGHT! WE DIDN'T FALL IN LOVE TO MAKE A FOOL OUT OF YOU! YOU DID THAT ALL BY YOURSELF WHEN YOU LIED TO ME! AND WHEN YOU CHEATED ON SAM AND I WAS A FOOL FOR HELPING YOU CHEAT ON SAM! HE DIDN'T DESERVE IT ANYMORE THAN I DID IN OUR SOPHMORE YEAR!" Finn turns his eyes to Sam who is just staring at him with wide eyes.

"Sam, dude, I am so sorry for what I did to you. I should have known better since it was done to me." Finn looks at Sam with apologetic eyes. Sam nods at Finn.

"Well it seems that we are making progress. Now who would like to go next?" Emma tries to keep things moving along. Will just stares at the red head. He still hasn't figured out who this woman is in front of him.

"I'm sorry Miss. P but I am going to get rude. You basically made Kurt's life hell because he was openly gay! You bullied him! Slushies, locker shoves, dumpster dives! But the two of you knew you were gay? Is that why you bullied Kurt was because he had more guts than you two? You couldn't stand the thought of someone else being happy so you made his life miserable? But we are suppose to be all accepting for the two of you. HELL NO!" Mercedes looks at the pair with contempt clearly written on her face.

Puck jumps up from his seat locking eyes with Mercedes. There is venom and hatred showing in the dark ominous hazel eyes.

"You want to know why I bullied Kurt? It wasn't because he was gay! It was because he thought it made him better than everyone else! His fancy clothes! His fancy Navigator! The way he talked to all of us like we were beneath him! He shoved it in everyone's face and then he couldn't handle the way the jocks reacted to him! THIS IS LIMA FUCKING OHIO! NOT NEW YORK!" Emma walks up to Noah and gently places her hand on his shoulder. He takes a calming breath before going on.

"I don't have a daddy to give me everything! I don't have daddy's credit cards when I go shopping! I don't have a daddy to make it okay to be gay! Did any of you know that I slept with all those women to help my Ma pay the bills? To keep a roof over our heads, to keep food on the table? To pay the medical bills for Beth?

I buy my clothes at second hand shops! I bought my own truck! I grew up on my own, taking care of _**my family**_! I pushed being in love with Finn to the back of my mind and I never acted on my feelings until a few days ago!" He looks from Mercedes to the other Gleeks in the room.

"I have known since the first time I slept with a girl that I am gay! I have known since my Dad left that I love Finn! He was the only person to ever give a damn about me or what was going on with me! But I never told him how I felt! I never told him that he is the only one that can calm me down, to make everything all right!

None of you know what it is like to be afraid of who you are, of how you feel about someone because they are the same sex as you! The four of us do! We all are afraid to love the one person that matters the most to us!" Noah can't control the tears coursing down his cheeks. "So don't you dare tell me _**you know**_ why I did the things I did! And don't you dare throw Kurt Fucking Hummel in my face either! I haven't bullied him in over two years! I haven't bullied anyone since I joined this club!"

Finn pulls Noah to him as he looks at the people he thought were his family. It scares him how they are reacting to them. He wonders which one of them will out them to the school. Which one will cause Noah to be hurt or yet to take his own life?

"I thought this club was about being who we are, the person we really are deep inside. I thought we cared enough about each other not to judge each other. But I was wrong. All of you are sitting there judging us because we love each other. You are looking at us like we are wrong, that we don't deserve to be happy.

Mercedes you brought up Kurt and how we treated him. Did you know how it felt when he was stalking me? That he set our parents up so I would _have_ to spend time with him? He even used Rachel to try to break me and Quinn up.

He would flirt with me in front of the jocks. They made my life hell because of him. He kept telling me that I didn't need a stupid girl to make me feel better, to be there for me. He knew Noah was Beth's father and not me. But he never told me. You knew and didn't tell me. He used all that drama to get closer to me, to try and get me to like him. To _make_ me like him.

I would tell him that I wasn't interested, that he made me uncomfortable but he wouldn't stop. I made my peace with Kurt a long time ago. **So excuse me if I don't feel sorry for loving Noah!**" Finn yells the last part at the dark Diva. He is tired of the girls making this about everyone or everything but him and Noah.

"Mercedes I have to agree with Finn. This isn't about Kurt or anyone else. It is about two boys who have finally found their way to each other. Love doesn't care what sex you are or the sex of the person you are in love with. It only cares that the love is returned equally.

All of you need to think about how much Finn and Noah have changed over the last couple of years. The way they both have stood up for each of you, for this club. Even Dave has changed and for the better. Each one of you really needs to look at themselves before saying anything bad about them. All of you have shared in the guilt of baby-gate, the bullying of Kurt, the way you have treated each other in the past. So think before you condemn them, because you are really condemning yourself as well." Emma looks at the kids hoping they will understand that each one of them has played a part in all the drama that seems to surround this group of teenagers.

"I'm okay with Finn and Puck being a couple. I can see the way they actually do love each other. It's written over both of their faces. I will help you any way I can." Tina looks at the boys. This revelation explains some of the recent events with Puck but not all of them. But she knew Ms. P was right they all played a part in the lies and deceits that plague the club. She smiles at the boys, a real smile.

"I love dolphins! There is nothing wrong with them loving each other. You all accepted Kurt and Blaine. So why can't everyone accept Pinn?" Brittany looks around the room. And then her eyes meet Santana's and she sees the love mixed with fear in dark umber eyes. She smiles at the Latino. "Oh I just thought of something! Now you don't need to have your intervention Rachel! We know what was going on with Puck."

The whole room stares at Brittany and then at Rachel. Emma is shocked and Will is confused to say the least. Brad the piano guys places a bet with himself that the Latino kicks big mouth's ass in under five seconds flat. Surprisingly it is Dave that speaks first.

"A what?" Dave looks at Rachel with a murderous glare. "You were going to stage an intervention for Puck? For what? He isn't doing drugs! He isn't drinking! What the hell is wrong with you people?"

"What the fuck Berry! What did I do to make you think I was on drugs or drinking? Hell I haven't bothered any of you! I don't even hang around you guys that much! So what gives you the right to think I need an intervention?" Puck is livid and on the verge of hitting a girl for the first time. His fists are clenched at his sides and his breathing is becoming erratic.

"Rachel you planned an intervention for Puck? Why didn't you just ask me if he was okay? Why didn't any of you try to talk to us?" Finn is just as confused as he is mad. He wonders what the hell Rachel's real problem is and why does it seem like she is targeting Puck.

"We did Finn but you were always around that, that asshole and Santana. You and Puck were never alone. We watched Puck go back to what he used to be, a bully. He has been slushing the nerds, sending them on dumpster dives, and he hung Jacob by his underwear from the flag pole. And YOU were hanging around HIM and getting HIM to join New Directions. I don't want that filth in MY choir room!" Rachel emphasizes certain words to get her point across unwittingly showing revealing her true motives.

"YOUR choir room. Oh that is rich Berry! I thought this room was for all of us! Not just Rachel Berry loser extraordinaire! Since when did helping Puck involve getting rid of Dave? When you decided it? WELL FUCK YOU RACHEL BERRY! You are not in charge of this club!" Santana advances towards Rachel with a feral look in her eyes. "I am so sick and tired of you always telling us how it is going to be and that makes it okay! That YOU are the only one that has dreams! AND I AM SO SICK AND TIRED OF YOU ALWAYS GETTING THE SOLOS! I CAN SING JUST AS GOOD AS YOU IF NOT BETTER! MERCEDES CAN OUT SING YOU! BRITTANY! TINA! BUT YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE THAT GETS THE SOLOS OR THE DUETS! IT IS ALWAYS ABOUT YOU! WELL NEWS FLASH BERRY WHEN YOU GET TO NEW YORK THERE IS GOING TO BE THOUSANDS OF _**YOU**_ GOING FOR THE SAME PART, THE SAME ROLE AND YOU KNOW WHAT? THERE IS EVEN GOING TO BE PEOPLE THERE WAY MORE TALENTED THAN _**YOU**_!" Finn places a hand on the Latino's shoulder pulling her back to stand behind him next to Noah.

"Rachel when did you try to talk to me? Because all you had to do was ask me and I would have went somewhere with you to talk. But you chose to make this about Dave using Noah as the excuse to get rid of him." Finn tells the short scared girl in front of him. "I am so sick of you twisting things around and thinking you are the only reason this club exists or the only reason we win competitions. And I am really sick of you using Noah!"

Puck steps up beside Finn and looks at the people he thought were friends. Some still were he could tell that but some were not. "I am going to make this easy for everyone. I QUIT! You can have you little club Berry. You can all talk about what a loser I am behind my back after I leave. None of you had the balls to ask ME what was wrong cause if you had I would have told you. But now you all can go to hell!"

Will stands to intervene but Emma stops him, shaking her head no. He stares at her dumbstruck. She whispers that this needs to happen.

Finn looks at Noah and makes up his mind. "Me too. Have fun without us Rachel."

Santana looks at Brittany sadly, "I'm done here too."

Dave just stares at each of the remaining members of New Directions and agrees, "look up the definition of friend after we leave and I am sure none of your pictures will be in there." He is the first to start walking towards the door, followed by the other three teens. None of them look back.

When the door closes it is Tina that stands and walks to the front of the room.

"You know when I started in this club I had a secret and I finally told the truth losing someone that cared about me. What you did Rachel was wrong and I told you that I was not going to be a part of it. Finn was right, you didn't do any of this to help Puck you did it to get back at Finn and Dave. Now I may have lost their friendships because of you. I am outta here too. Mike you can stay if you want but I am leaving." Tina shakes her head as she walks out of the door.

Brittany looks sadly around the room, kissing Artie on the cheek. "I can't stay here either. There is nothing wrong with them loving each other, but there is a lot wrong with the way you treat people Rachel." Brittany walks out.

Mike and Sam are the next ones to leave. Mike just walks out, he doesn't say a word to anyone. Sam looks at Mercedes, "Cedes I understand how you feel but there is way too much drama in this club and I actually like Puck. Finn apologized and he meant it. Rachel you brought this on yourself. I'm out of here too." Sam walks out the door.

Mercedes thinks for a minute about what Puck had said to her and also how Finn talked about Kurt. She knew when Kurt chased Finn that he was obsessive and it was borderline stalking. Mercedes closes her eyes for a minute and prays for an answer. She opens the dark chocolate orbs and looks straight at Rachel.

"Crazy you just destroyed the club single handedly. I hope that you are proud of yourself. I listened to what they all had to say. I learned things today that I didn't know especially about Puck and what his life is really like. I learned how Finn felt when Kurt was nearly stalking him. And Santana was right, I am a better singer than you. This club was never about just you but all of us and you wrecked it over some petty BS that you created. I quit too. Sorry Mr. Shue." Mercedes walks out of the room.

Rachel is left with Quinn, Emma and Will still in the room.

"Well at least I have Cheerio's" Quinn says to herself.

"What the hell just happened?" Will looks at Emma. "Rachel you were going to trick everyone by using an intervention? To what get rid of Puck? Dave? Finn? I always knew you thought you carried this club but you don't. Every single person that just walked out of here played an important role in this club, including Dave. He was a wonderful addition. His voice could have broadened our song selection. I just don't understand you Rachel." Will throws his hands up in the air pacing around the room.

"I didn't think anyone else would quit. I mean I was ready to get rid of the four of them but I didn't think everyone else would quit." Rachel looks at her hands.

"That's the problem with you Rachel you only think about yourself and no one else. That goes for you too Quinn. I have sat here and listened to what each person, including the two of you, had to say in this little session. I am disappointed in the two of you in particular. You Rachel played on everyone's dislike of Dave to try and throw him out before you even gave him a chance." Emma looks straight at Rachel as she speaks and then turning to face Quinn. "Quinn, you were more worried about what other people would think of _**you**_ that you couldn't even be compassionate for the two boys. You tried to make it all about you and it isn't.

Don't the two of you get tired of treating people like they are nothing but stepping stones for your reputations or dreams? Aren't you tired of the way people shy away from you or treat you like you have no feelings? But what frightens me is that neither one of you is capable of thinking about anyone but yourselves.

So I am going to think for you at this moment. You both are manipulative and backstabbing girls. I hope that you really pay attention to what I am about to say. I don't think the others will say anything about them but the two of you will try and figure a way to get back at them for hurting you.

If these boys are outed before they are ready I will personally see to it that you both have detention for the rest of your senior year. Every school day, every week, every month until you graduate. Understand ladies?" Emma has the meanest scowl on her face they have ever seen.

"You can't do that! Coach Sylvester will never allow you to keep me in detention for no reason!" Quinn screeches indignantly at Miss P.

"Oh yes I will Q. And I am going to back the sneaky Ginger up on this. Those boys have suffered enough because of you." Sue looks at Quinn in such a way that there is no room for argument. It seems that everyone had forgotten that she was in the room. It was part of her CIA training. "You lost my support Q when you tried to pawn you child off as someone else's. You only thought of yourself and you continue to think of only yourself. So I would keep my mouth shut if I were you."

"This is your fault Rachel. I won't have to out them, they will do that themselves." Quinn sneers as she stomps from the room, her pony tail swinging with each heavy step.

"That girl just doesn't learn." Sue mutters to herself.

"Mr. Shue you can't let her do this to me! It will be on my permanent record!" Rachel whines to Will. "My dads will be furious!"

"What do you think will infuriate them more? You outing two teenage boys that aren't ready yet or you getting detention because of it?" Emma looks at Rachel with her arms crossed over her chest.

"Fine! I won't say a word." Rachel huffs and storms from the room. It is not quite as effective as she would like it to be.

"You did good Ginger." Sue nods at Emma as she follows the girls out of the room.

"Emma I have never heard you speak so forcefully. What happened between you and Puck in your office?" Will walks up beside the Ginger slightly turned on. "And why did I let my let my club quit?"

"Now is not the time Will. And whatever Noah and I talked about in my office stays confidential." Emma looks at Will incredulously. "This needed to happen, to get all the drama resolved or at least to get them to think about all the nonsense they put each other through. These kids need to learn that family is important to them before they graduate and get lost in the shuffle."

"Emma it is effecting my students and this club, well what is left of this club." Will has never seen this side of Emma and wonders what triggered it. "I won't say anything you tell me."

"William Shuester you of all people should know that I can not tell you what was said in my office. I made two promises to Noah and I will not break them. It is immoral and unethical." Emma looks at Will like he is one of the teenagers that just exited the room. "I am going to lock up my office and head home. I will see you tomorrow Will."

Will watches her leave the room and sits down in one of the chairs vacated by the kids. He just watched and listened as all but two of his members quit the show choir, two students come out and declare their love for each other, and the last two years of drama be rehashed once again. But just maybe the drama was truthfully told for a change. Will thanks Brad and walks to his office.


	10. To Choose Life or Death

Hello my readers! This chapter may seem a little bouncy but I need to get to a certain point. This chapter is focused on Noah. There are still so many twists and turns for this story to come. As always please review and I know this one is a hard one to read as it was hard for me to write but be patient and the next chapter will begin to answer some questions, not many but some. Thanks to everyone that has alerted or reviewed and as always love ya ValBabe! And to Rain hope the beach was fun! Hemmy

**Chapter 10**

**To Choose Life or Death**

After the break up of New Directions, life seemed to go on for everyone. Most of the former members made peace with Puck and Finn. Mike, Sam and Artie talked with the boys privately, making sure that everything was on the up and up. They even included Dave in their conversations at lunch. Tina and Brittany were the strongest supporters of the new couple, with Mercedes still trying to deal with all the new facts about the boys and Kurt.

The days turned into weeks and the assembly went off without a hitch. The disgruntled jocks sang a little out of tune and danced a little out of step with the choreography but there wasn't any fights between the jocks or the Gleeks. 'We Will Rock You/We are the Champions' was a hit with the student body. The students stomped their feet so much that Mr. Figgins was afraid the bleachers would collapse.

Noah's private life was a different story though. The scream fest that happened a short while ago seemed to only hurt his fragile psyche more than he was telling anyone. The pain he was feeling was intensifying and he couldn't stop it. The memories of his past seem to just pop up when he was in class, at lunch, anytime that he was trying to focus on something good.

The notes that kept appearing in his locker by the end of each day were slowly destroying him too. They were the same words more or less that _**HE**_ used during the rape. '_**Im gonna break you bitch!**_'. '_**Gonna make you scream beg me to stop!' **_'_**Gonna rip you in two!**_' "_**You belong to me whore!**_'

With each new note, chills runs through his body and a momentary flash back to that night. He would look around the hallway trying to figure out who was placing them in his locker and no one ever stood out to him as he would stuff the note in his backpack. The words would play over and over in his mind.

The nightmares had changed and now they were even more terrifying to Noah. They would begin with making out with Finn and then Finn would change to _**him**_. Love and lust would change to terror and excruciating pain. Something good would turn into something sickeningly vile.

Noah would wake in Finn's arms struggling to break free only seeing _**his face**_, not Finn's. He couldn't tell Finn, because then he would have to admit he knew who did it to him. He would act like everything was okay and let Finn hold him.

He would wait until Finn was back asleep before slipping out of the bed and taking a hot shower. He would scrub until his skin was raw trying to get the feel of _**him**_ off of his body and then he would curl up on the tile floor of the shower quietly sobbing until the water would begin to cool. After drying off he would slip back under the covers but away from Finn. No matter how many showers he took or how hard he scrubbed, no matter what Finn said he would feel dirty.

The only time Noah felt safe and that someone understood him was in Emma Pillsbury's office. They would talk about the weather, the next game and eventually his nightmares. She would listen to him describe them and try to offer some type of solace. Emma knew that Noah was fighting to stay alive.

Emma called Finn into her office and talked with the tall teenager about Noah's mother. She learned that Mrs. Puckerman did know what had happened to Noah at the party. Finn also told her about Noah not trusting his mother after the hospital incident. The ginger haired counselor asked if there was anyone else that Noah trusted that was a parent figure to him. The answer was Carole Hudson-Hummel.

She thanked Finn for talking with her and told him that he could not tell Noah what they talked about in her office. But she urged Finn to keep an eye on the dark skinned teen just simply stating that everything isn't always what it seems to be. As soon as Finn left her office she called Mrs. H and asked if they could meet at the Lima Bean after work to discuss Noah Puckerman. Mrs. H agreed to the meeting without hesitation.

The very same afternoon Ruth was taking Noah back to see Dr. Joe Lopez for his 'check up'. The car ride was tense as Noah still had issues trusting his mother or anyone other than Finn, Dave or Santana. Dr. Joe escorted them to a private cubicle and asked Ruth to wait in the nurse's lounge. He did not want a repeat performance of the last examination.

A nurse that Noah knew worked with his mother came in and took his vitals along with a small vial of blood. Dr. Joe explained to Noah that it was to test for any diseases' and infections. Dr. Joe asks if Noah has been experiencing anything abnormal such as pain or discomfort in his abdominal region and Noah just shrugs making a noncommittal noise.

"Noah I know this is very hard for you, and I honestly have no idea what you are going through. Please try to cooperate with me the questions that I am asking are very important and I need honest and truthful answers. Okay?" Dr. Lopez looks at the slouched over teen.

"I hurt, back there some, but not as much as before. I haven't felt like eating a lot and I feel like I have a stomach bug or something. I don't sleep because of nightmares and I just want to forget this ever happened. Is that enough information for you?" Noah snarks at the kind doctor. "And no, you have no fucking clue what I am going through! No one does!"

"You're right Noah, no one does and we won't understand until you help us out by talking to us." Dr. Lopez sits on a stool in front of the jock holding his folder. "I would want to forget it happened to me too. Do you have someone that you can talk to? Someone that can help you get through all of the emotional hurt?"

"Uh, yeah. Finn has been really great trying to help me. Dave and Santana are there for me." Noah looks at the Latin doctor deciding it was okay to talk to him. "There is one person that I feel safe around and comfortable, Miss Pillsbury. She is my counselor at school and she is really helping me out a lot. She makes me stop in her office every day to make sure I am doing okay and to talk to me."

"That's good Noah. You need to be able to trust someone and to be able to talk to that person. If you ever need to talk or just need a place to go, call me. I don't believe giving you medication is going to help you but I think knowing you have somewhere you can go will." Dr. Joe writes his cell phone number down for Noah and hands it to him. He understands the hidden meaning behind Miss Pillsbury's help. Suicide is common among rape victims, especially male on male rape victims.

"Thanks Dr. Joe." Noah puts the piece of paper in his front pocket. He watches Dr. Joe excuse himself to answer a call on his cell.

Joe looks at the caller ID on his phone and sees the familiar name of Roger Dunham, he answers the call with a heavy heart filled with anxiety for the teenage boy he just left.

"Hey Rog. Did you get…Slow down Roger. I will be up there in a…Okay. Fine. I will meet you in the nurse's lounge in a few minutes. No, that is where his mother is and she knows what is going on. Yeah, she knows he could be pregnant. I will talk to you in a minute."

Dr. Joe walks down to the nurse's lounge to where Ruth Puckerman nervously waits for the news. Both doctors and parent are lost in their thoughts of the situation, a mother wants her son to be safe and healed; while both doctors thinks of the ramifications of a male pregnancy for the hospital and thier careers.

Roger and Joe arrive at the same time at the door to the lounge and walk in together. Ruth eyes both men suspiciously unable read either of their faces. She calmly puts her hands on the table, "well if you both are here then I know what the answer is, my son is pregnant." The words sound hollow to her ears in the silent room.

"Ruth I wish I could actually say I am sorry, but in all honesty I am looking at what it could mean for this hospital. The grants, the funding we could possibly acquire because of your son is astronomical." Roger is the first to speak to Ruth. "I know that it is going to be hard for your son…"

"You don't have a fucking clue Roger! My son has always been ridiculed because of his deadbeat father! He got a girl pregnant two years ago I almost lost him when the selfish bitch gave the little girl up! And now he is pregnant by his rapist! I am going to lose my son!" Ruth stands from her chair tears slipping down her cheeks. "I am going to lose my son because of some stupid gene that bastard passed on to him! So excuse the fuck out of me if I am not ecstatic about all the money this hospital could make!"

"Ruth please calm down! I don't have a clue what Noah is going through! Or what you are going through! But I do know that becoming hysterical is not going to help!" Joe tries to reason with the enraged and frightened mother.

"I am calm Joe. I just need time to think of a way to tell him that he is carrying a child. A child conceived by rape, not love, but RAPE!" Ruth Puckerman is pacing like a caged animal. Her face is flushed and wet from her own tears.

"What if we all talk to him? Try to explain to him what is going on with his body. Let him know that what is happening to him, to his body, is actually normal." Roger looks at Joe for support.

"Ruth, what if you and I told him together? I could help explain about the gene and the process his body is starting to go through and will continue to go through until the baby arrives. We could talk to him about his options." Joe knows Ruth is scared for her son and that she needs all the support she can get at the moment.

"Thank you Joe, but no. I am going to tell my son the truth and I am going to ask his other mother to be there. She is the only one that he will listen to about this and I think it would be better for Noah if it was me and Carole." Ruth understands that Joe is just trying to help but she knows Noah better than anyone except maybe Finn.

Ruth Puckerman walks from the nurse's lounge and reaches for her cell phone to call Carole who is across town having coffee with Emma Pillsbury at the Lima Bean.

"Thank you for meeting with me Mrs. Hummel. I am worried about Noah Puckerman and Finn said that he trusted you more than his own mother right now." Emma stirs her coffee while watching Carole's face.

"Finn called me and told me about your discussion with him. What is going on with Noah?" Carole is afraid of the answer, because she knows it already. Noah could fool Finn but not his second Mom.

"I can't really say what he tells me in my office but I am truly worried about him. He is acting like everything is okay, getting better, when it's really not. Do you ever hear him at night? Finn said that Noah and his sister are staying with you at night due to his mother working nightshift at the hospital." Emma smoothes out her skirt, it is one of the nervous twitches that she is suppose to be working on.

"No not really. I know that he has nightmares but Finn always calms him down. What are you hinting at Emma?" Carole had heard Noah screaming before but not recently. She watched the ginger haired woman take a deep breath.

"I can only say that I think you need to listen to him at night or at least listen for him having a nightmare or taking a shower in the middle of the night. Maybe just show a little more attention to his activities at night when he is staying with you." Emma's large doe like eyes plead with Carole.

"You think he is going to commit suicide don't you?" The question is more of a statement from Carol. She watches the smaller woman nod her head. "I will do everything in my power to take care of that boy, he has always been _**my son **_too. Thank you for meeting with me Emma." Carole grabs her purse to leave when her cell starts ringing, the caller ID showing R Puckerman.

Carole takes the call outside of the coffee house. She had been dreading the call all day. Even though they never actually spoke about the possibility of Noah being pregnant, Carole knew it was a chance.

The phone call was short and to the point. Ruth needed for Carole to meet her at the Puckerman house and to bring Finn. 'It was bad' was all Ruth was able to tell Carole before her voice broke and she ended the call. Carole drove to the Hudmel house and picked up Finn and Sarah. She dropped Sarah off with Burt and told him what she thought was happening, _Noah is pregnant_. Burt said that he would take care of Sarah and not to worry about her.

The drive for the Puckerman's had been excruciatingly quiet for both of them for different reasons. Ruth was trying hard to find a way to tell her son a piece of information that, most likely, would end his life. Noah was trying to figure out a way of talking to Finn about his nightmares, Miss P had suggested it in their last meeting. Neither one knew what the other was thinking about as they walked into the house.

"Noah I need for you to wait in the living room, Carole is on her way over here. We both need to talk to you." Ruth's voice is devoid of any emotions, it is lifeless. She watches her son flinch at her words. She wants to reach out to her son, to hold him but she understands that would possible drive him further away from her.

Noah sits on the couch and thinks about what they could talk to him about, nothing comes to mind. He hasn't been in any fights since attacking Azimio over Dave, he hasn't had the energy to set anything on fire, the only thing he has done is quit New Directions and both women knew why he did that. So he just sits and waits for Carole fidgeting with the hem of his combat jacket.

Carole and Finn pull up in front of the house. Finn knew if he was along then something bad had happened to Noah again. He wanted to cry, to hit something, to make something hurt as much as he did right now. As much as he knew Noah must be hurting. Both Hudson's exited the car and walked up to the front door.

Ruth heard the car pulling up in the driveway and met them at the front door. She politely asked Finn to wait with Noah while she talked with Carole alone in the kitchen. The women left the two boys sitting on the couch together.

"Do you know what this is about?" Finn reaches for Noah's hand with his larger one.

"No. I thought maybe you did. I mean I know I haven't been in trouble lately and I've been too fucked up to really do any damage to anyone." Noah lets Finn take his hand, feeling the warmth and the comfort from the large pale hand.

"I don't have a clue dude. Mom talked to Burt when we dropped Sarah off at the shop, she wouldn't let me get out of the car. I wonder if we both are in trouble." Finn has this confused and frightened look on his face.

Ruth goes into her bedroom and grabs a yellowed folder that has Noah's name on it. She tells Carole about her conversation with Roger and Joe. Her voice holds no emotion as she explains the situation to her former best friend and that she needs Carole to be there for both of them. After a few minutes the two women walk back into the living room.

"I just want to say that I love you Noah, no matter what I will always love you. I know that you are still mad at me about the hospital but I need you to really listen to me right now. Okay?" Ruth looks at her oldest child, her son. The dark circles under his eyes, the slight redness, the puffiness signaling a lack of sleep. She watches as Noah nods at her with mistrust showing in the dark lifeless orbs.

"When Carole took you to the ER a month ago Dr. Joe found something that shocked him. So he had blood tests run to check out his findings. The results backed up what Joe found during the examination.

Noah you were born with the RYT gene. It is hereditary from the male/father. I had you tested when you were born because Ezra was a carrier. You tested positive for the gene." Ruth opens the folder on the coffee table handing Noah the test results from almost eighteen years ago. She watches the dark shaking hand take the paper.

"What does this mean Ma? We studied this stuff in Biology. If I am a carrier then it means that I can….NO!" The meaning becomes clear to Noah. He was born with female reproductive organs making him half a girl. It means he can get pregnant.

"Noah listen to me! Joe ran the tests again today. I am so sorry baby, but the results came back positive." Ruth watches the tears slip down the dark cheeks, dripping onto his shirt. "There were no mistakes, you are pregnant."

"This is some kind of sick joke! You are just trying to get back at me for being mad at you! Do you hate me that much Ma?" Noah is seething with rage and fear.

"I could never hate you! You are my son!" Ruth yells at Noah.

"This isn't true! This cant be happening to me! I AM A GUY! I AM A NORMAL GUY! I AM NOT A GIRL! I CANT GET PREGNANT! FUCK!" Noah's body is racked with hard sobs as he feels Finn pull him against the taller teen. "I can't be pregnant!"

Finn understands what Ruth is saying to Noah. Kurt had explained the whole gene thing to him one night after Finn asked a really dumb question about protection. His boyfriend is pregnant by the bastard that raped him. Finn can feel his own tears escaping down his pale cheeks.

Ruth is silently crying for her son. She hugs her own body trying to find some comfort. _Why did it seem God punished her son with such a vengeance? Ezra walking out. Beth. The rape. And now the pregnancy. _Ruth could see the reality of burying her only son.

Carole goes to the couch, sitting down beside Noah, pulling the Jewish boy to her. Finn's face flashes a with a moment of jealousy before letting his mother hold his boyfriend. Noah clings to Carole brokenly sobbing into the crook of her shoulder, his hands fisted tight in the sides of her shirt. She strokes the stripe of dark hair not saying anything just holding, rocking the traumatized young Jew.

Finn watches Mrs. P clinging to herself. He stands and walks over to her wrapping his big arms around her petite body. He cries with her; for her son his boyfriend. There nothing any of them can say.

Noah finally cries himself to sleep in Carole's arms. Finn pulls away from Mrs. P and carries Noah upstairs to his room. He gently pulls the combat jacket off the sleeping jock and lays him carefully in the bed. His boyfriend looks so small and even in his sleep he looks broken.

Finn sits on the floor beside the bed laying his head beside Noah's hand. He cries silently for the young man that he loves, for all the pain that is running through the dark teen. He doesn't understand how God could put someone through so much misery and anguish. He prays for Noah to find peace, to be able to make it through it all and to never leave him. His eyes begin to droop from all of the emotional strain.

Ruth and Carole are in the living room talking about Noah's options. Ruth doesn't believe in abortion but she is considering the possibility in this case. Adoption is another possibility but it brings back too many memories for both mothers because of Beth. Ruth and Carole both wonder if praying for a miscarriage would be wrong, but they both know that would cause more damage to Noah's fragile mental health.

Noah awakens with the one single thought he has had for the past few weeks. Hell if he was honest, the past couple of years. Since the day he signed those damn papers that gave away his only saving grace, Beth. The daughter everyone thought was a mistake except him. He had wanted her since Finn told him Quinn was pregnant. He had wanted to do the right thing but no one would let him.

Noah looks at Finn who is sleeping with his head laying on the bed. He smiles for a moment, letting his fingers lightly comb through the light brown tresses. Noah loves Finn more than anything in his life. But he knows that Finn would be better off without him. Without this thing inside of him.

The dark skinned Jew lays down flat on his bed letting his hands wander across his belly. He stops when he finds a small bump. He knows it's the baby. His thoughts wander to the possibilities of what if…he kept it…he got rid of it…every thought included the father/rapist. He never wanted to see that person again but he knows if he keeps the baby that person will never go away.

Noah doesn't realize when he climbs quietly out of the bed or heads down to the kitchen. He doesn't think about it as his hand reaches out for one of his mother's sharp cutlery knives. He doesn't feel the tip of the blade as he places it against the soft flesh of his belly. He doesn't know what is happening until he hears his name being screamed out by his boyfriend. And then he can only look at the light brown orbs that hold so much love in them and whisper, 'I'm sorry'.


	11. I Need You To Stay

_I would apologize for the cliff hanger last chapter but…It was necessary. And I also know that I said some questions would be answered in this chapter but the plot bunny went left when I said turn right. But the build up is the point in this story. Someone once said, that everything is not what it seems. To me that is the best plotline for a story. So without anymore ramblings. Please read and review. Plus a huge thanks to all that do review that is like feeding carrots to my plot bunnies and alerts make the author very happy. Peace my friends….Hemmy_

**Chapter 11**

**I Need You To Stay**

'_I'm sorry'_

Carole and Ruth are on their feet and running into the kitchen when they hear Finn scream Noah's name. They stop at the doorway seeing Noah, the steel blade of the cutlery reflecting in the light poised at his stomach. Carole put her hand out stopping Ruth from running to the frightened Jewish teen.

"No! You're not sorry! If you were sorry you wouldn't be doing this Noah!" Finn takes a couple of steps towards the smaller jock. "You promised me! You promised me that you wouldn't leave me, that you wouldn't do this!"

"I can't take it anymore Finn! I can't take the loneliness! Feeling like the world is laughing at me! I have never been enough for anyone! My Dad! Quinn! Beth! You! I'm always going to be the town whore! Good enough to use, but never good enough to keep around!" Noah cries at the taller teen hoping he will understand. "The only reason you stick around is because you feel like you have to, that I'm like a dog someone dropped off. You feel so sorry for it that you let it hang around."

Finn can see a red line begin to slip down the tanned skin from the tip of the sharp steel point of the knife. He stops, knowing that if he makes any sudden movements he would never reach Noah in time to stop the blade from plunging in the soft flesh.

"Noah I love you! You're not some stray dog/animal to me! You are the man I want to spend the rest of my life with! There has never been anyone else for me but you! Don't do this PLEASE!" Finn is crying begging his boyfriend.

"You deserve better than…THIS!" Noah points at himself, at his body. "I'm pregnant Finn! By _**HIM**_! I DON'T WANT THIS THING INSIDE OF ME! I DON'T WANT SOMETHING TO REMIND ME OF WHAT _**HE**_ TOOK AWAY! I DON'T WANT TO BE A FREAK!"

"BABY PLEASE DON'T DO THIS! I NEED YOU! PLEASE!" Finn reaches his hand for Noah to take.

"It hurts so much when you touch me Finn! I used to dream about a life with you, being in love. And now when I dream about us; you turn into HIM! All I ever wanted was for you to love me! And now that has been taken from me too! Please just let me do this, let me stop the hurt!" Noah 's hands were trembling so fiercely, he pushes down a little, causing more blood to run down the smooth dark skin. He is so focused on begging Finn to let him go that he doesn't even feel the sting of deepening the cut.

A noise from the backdoor surprises everyone. The voice is unmistakable. Carole and Ruth say silent prayers of thanks for the man standing in the doorway. Finn watches as his hero steps into the room.

"NOAH PUCKERMAN! LOOK AT ME!" Burt Hummel had walked through the back door. Carole had text him and told him she needed him, that Noah needed him. Burt had been terrified when he walked in the door to see the Mohawk'd teen holding a large kitchen knife to his stomach.

Noah looks at Burt his body shaking with sobs, but the grip on the knife remained tight holding the steel instrument against his abdomen. "Please go away Mr. H"

"Son I'm not going anywhere until you talk to me. You are worth so much to everyone in this room, including me. I can't begin to understand what you are feeling, hell I have never been good with feelings and shit." Burt Hummel looks at the young man standing in front of him as he quietly takes steps closer to the distraught Jewish teen. "You can get through this! All of us will help you!"

"Why do you want to help me? No one has ever wanted to help me before! No one has ever given a shit about me! Everyone chooses someone else over me! I wasn't even good enough for Beth, MY OWN DAUGHTER!" Noah's breath is ragged, his cheeks soaked with tears.

"I'm tired of hurting Mr. H, I am tired of just existing. No one sees me, no one even notices if something is wrong. It's like I am not even in the same room as everyone else! When I signed those fucking papers no one asked me if I was okay, they all ran to Quinn to make sure she was okay! Everyone believed her without even asking me what happened that night! They all treated me like I r-raped her! I was the one that was drunk! She was sober! I told her no but she told me that my dick said I wanted her! I was mad at Finn for choosing her! I wanted to get back at him, to make him hurt like me, so I just laid there and let her!" The dark hazel orbs flash so many emotions at Burt.

"At the party I froze; I couldn't stop _**him**_! I was so scared and it hurt so fucking much! I couldn't even scream! I let that fucker take the only thing no one else had touched, the one thing I had never used for sex! Now I have nothing left! Except a baby that I don't want!

Do you know what it is going to be like when everyone finds out I'm pregnant? It's only going to get worse for me! For Finn! People already look at me like I'm nothing but a _**dirty**_ _**slut**_ and now they are going to look at me like I am a _**FREAK! **_

I cant take it anymore! I can't handle the nightmares! The notes! The looks from everyone at school! It's like they all know what happened to me, they look at me like I deserved it!" He tightens the his grip on the knife handle. "I don't want to be here anymore! I just want the pain to go away! The memories to go away! I just want to find peace!"

"Noah this isn't the way to find peace son. You may not feel anything anymore but there is a little girl sitting in my truck right now that would be devastated if you do this. You're mother needs you. Carole and me, we need you too." Burt watches as Noah's hand begins to tremble, relaxing the grip on the knife handle.

"And that overgrown giant standing right here needs you more than he needs to breath. I see the way he looks at you, the way he hovers around you. Finn needs you Noah. If you do this you will leave him behind to feel exactly how you are feeling right now. I know you love him and you don't want him to feel this way too."

Burt takes the final step to stand in front of Noah placing his hand over the smaller dark hand holding the knife. He gently pulls the steel blade from Noah's hand passing it to Finn before pulling the Jewish teen against his body, holding him tight. Burt hears the broken words from Noah's burning throat, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Burt tells the young man that it isn't his fault and that they would make sure he made it through this mess. Burt didn't realize he was crying along with the dark skin teen.

Finn throws the knife in the garbage can and runs to his mother. His heart feels like it has been torn apart. Noah was right, no one ever asked him what happened that night with Quinn. _**He**_ had never asked Noah about that night. They all _assumed_ it was Noah that was responsible for Quinn getting pregnant. Hearing Noah's words made him want to choke the life out of the cold hearted bitch. He buries his face in the crook of his mother's neck sobbing openly at everything he had heard.

Ruth watches as Burt holds her son like his own. The tears he is crying are for her son. She knows that he needs this burly man more than her right now. Ruth watches Noah clutches at Burt's flannel shirt begging for unwarranted forgiveness. She feels a long arm suddenly wrap around her small frame pulling her into an embrace with Finn and Carole. She finally breaks down after all the events that had happened today.

Finn notices when Noah calms in Burt's arms and gently pulls out of the embrace from his mother and Mrs. P. He walks over to Burt and Noah looking at Burt to make sure it is okay before wrapping his arms around Noah. Burt nods at the freakishly tall teenager and gently turns Noah so that he is facing Finn. Burt steps over to Carole and Ruth letting the boys find their way to each other.

Noah standing on trembling legs takes a tentative step towards the open arms of Finn. He collapses on the floor in front of Finn, exhausted from the tears, the pain, the memories that flood his mind. A dark hand reaches up from the floor, reaching for the one person he loves more than life. He can feel the strong pale arms wrap around him, being scooped up, and then carried into the living room.

After laying Noah on the couch Finn quietly talks to the emotionally scarred jock. Letting him know that he would always be there for him no matter what; no matter how long it took for Noah to be okay, he would be there for him.

Ruth and Carole find the necessary medical supplies to clean the self inflicted cut on Noah's stomach. The cut is about an inch deep and a little over two inches long. Ruth calls Dr. Joe and asks if he could bring a suture kit by the house, she explained that Noah had an accident. Dr. Joe agrees knowing the truth, he could hear it in Ruth's voice.

Burt heads out to his truck to talk to Sarah and try to explain to her that Noah wasn't feeling good and he needed her to go up to her room for a little while. Burt couldn't stop the tears as the little girl with huge brown eyes asked if her 'NoNo was going to be okay'. He told her that he and Noah's moms were going to make sure he was better than okay before giving her a hug and walking her into the house.

Dr. Joe arrives a little while later with a suture kit and a mild sedative for Noah. He also has the name of two excellent therapists that he believes Noah desperately needs in dealing with all of this drama. He looks at the wound on the dark teen's abdomen, it was just below the bellybutton. He knew what the Jewish boy had been attempting, to get rid of the baby.

When he arrives Noah begins to panic until Joe calmly talks to him. Joe tells the frightened teen that he is not there to judge him but to only take care of him. Noah begs Joe not to knock him out but Joe asks Noah to trust him about the shot, that he needs to rest. Noah finally agrees after Burt and Finn both promise to be there if he has a nightmare.

The cut wasn't deep enough to hurt the embryo, but it did warrant two stitches. The nummer and the mild sedative put Noah out in a matter of minutes. Finn stayed in the living room with Noah sitting on the floor beside the couch while holding the smaller darker hand in his. The four adults go to the kitchen table to sit and talk about Noah and how to handle him.

Dr. Joe sees the kitchen knife in the trash can as he is walking by. He begins the discussion first.

"I know you probably don't want to admit it yet, but Noah needs professional help Ruth. He tried to kill himself today, he could try it again and succeed." Joe looks at Ruth without judgment in his eyes. He lays the two cards he brought from his office on the table. "Both of these doctors are the best in the business and they will see Noah at a minimum cost to you."

"I barely make enough money to keep a roof over our heads thanks to my ex-husband. I still get notices in the mail threatening to take me to court over bills he ran up. I can't afford the extra cost and I can't afford not to I know." Ruth wrings her hands trying to figure out what to do for her son.

"Joe what if I gave him a part time job at the shop? I mean I could help keep an eye on him and he could earn the extra money to pay for the shrink." Burt knows that Noah is proud, even in this situation, the boy still has a semblance of pride.

"I think that would be a good idea for him. It would help to build up his confidence again and make him participate in something that benefits him. Plus it would keep his mind occupied and off what is happening to him. I think it would be a good idea as long as there is no heavy lifting or harsh chemicals." Joe looks at Ruth and watches her nod in agreement.

"I am going to ask what everyone is afraid to ask. Joe could he have an abortion? I mean if that is what he wants. We heard what he said to Finn and Burt. He doesn't want to be a freak and he doesn't want the baby." Carole looks at everyone sitting at the table. She doesn't necessarily believe in abortion but in this case she feels like it would be best.

"He could and right now would be the best time to do it if his mental state wasn't so fragile. Noah gave up a child once for adoption and I have heard from my own daughter that he desperately wanted to keep the baby. So for me to say, I think it would be best right now, no. In a few weeks maybe. The child is innocent in this case no matter what the sins of the father might be and I think with Noah's heritage and beliefs that it would hurt him more to get rid of the fetus." Joe states what he believes is the truth no matter what could benefit the hospital. His first and foremost concern is the young man in the next room.

"What if I wanted it? Since I am his mother and he is under eighteen, I could sign the paperwork right? I could make the decision for him." Ruth thinks it would be for the best if Noah got rid of the fetus and deal with life afterwards. "He could get the therapy he needs to get on with his life and get past this part of it."

"Ruth if you made the decision for him and it isn't what he really wants; he could hate you over it. I know Noah isn't the most strict in his faith, but to 'get rid' of a child…I don't know if he would really want that." Carole looks at Burt for support.

"Ruth I agree with Joe and Carole. I think this is his decision to make, not yours. I know you want what is best for him and you want this mess to be over for him quickly but I honestly think you will hurt him even more if you make the decision for him. Let's get him started working with a shrink and see what happens before you make any rash judgments. Okay?" Burt reaches for Ruth's hand as a gesture of comfort.

"Okay. I will see how it goes with the therapist and I think working for you is a good idea too. Noah seems to like you Burt and he needs a father figure, a good man to help him make the right decisions. Thank you." Ruth offers a small smile at the three sitting at her kitchen table.

Finn walks into the kitchen looking for Noah's backpack. He had been replaying everything that Noah had said to all of them before being knocked out. When Noah said something about the notes it made him wonder what Noah was talking about. He had never said anything about any notes and it made Finn wonder what kind of notes they were.

"Uh sorry to interrupt but Mrs. P do you know where Noah's backpack is? I want to look at the notes, something isn't right about that." Finn stands with his hands in his pockets.

"I think he left it in the car. What notes Finn?" Mrs. P asks as she hands him her car keys to unlock the Volvo.

"Noah said he couldn't take it anymore. And then he said the notes. I am guessing they are from the guy that…I just wanted to see what they say." Finn feels the rage building up inside of him at the thought of the rapist sending notes to his victim.

"Go get the backpack son and bring it in here. I think we all need to see them." Burt looks at Finn nodding his head at the tall teenager. "We need to know what is going on with Noah if we are going to be able to help him."

Finn walks out to the car unlocking it with the remote. He finds the bag in the back floorboard and carries it into the house. He goes into the living room checking on Noah to make sure he was still a sleep. Finn gently kisses Noah's forehead before walking into the kitchen. He hands the backpack to Burt who has his hand outstretched to his lanky stepson.

Burt unzips the main part of the bag pulling out Noah's notebooks and a couple of school books. He unzips the front pocket and pulls out over ten notes scrawled in thick black ink. The notes make everyone at the table cringe. Ruth starts crying again and Carole is white knuckling one note that stated what _a good little bitch _Noah was that night. Burt is seeing nothing but red as the note he is reading, it makes him want to punch the wall or better yet grab his shotgun and shoot the balls off the bastard that wrote them.

Finn is staring at the note he is holding. The heavy lettering telling how the rapist was _gonna rip him in two make him scream_. Finn barely makes it to the bathroom before throwing up. Carole walks in trying to calm him down but she is just as upset as Finn. Both end up crying over what they read.

Joe speaks his thoughts, "how could someone be so cruel to this kid?" His note is scary '_Its not over faggot_'. Joe stares at the note trying to figure out how to deal with this crap. He looks through the other notes on the table with Burt before speaking again. "Whoever is behind this is either extremely smart or psychotic. Either way they are scary. They knew what to say to Noah."

Finn walks back into the room with Carole, still clutching the note that made him sick. The wording wasn't the only reason he felt sick, he recognized the scribbling. But it just cant be that person. He hands the note to Burt and Joe watching their faces pale at the words. "What are we going to do Burt? This guy is still going after him. How can we stop it?" Finn is on the verge of tears again, but fights them back down and lets the rage take over.

"I want you to go back in there with Noah and sit with him. He needs you and you need to be near him right now. Let us figure out what we can do since Noah didn't go to the police. Carole and I will talk to you about it later. Okay son?" Burt knows what he is asking of Finn but he doesn't want his stepson freaking out anymore than necessary. Carole nods her head at Finn, hugging him before he walks back in to the living room.

"So what do we do? What can we do Burt? You know the school is not going to be any help. Hell Figgins won't stop the bullying so he won't care about this." Ruth dries her eyes on the sleeve of her shirt. "What about the Shuester guy, the Glee coach? Would he help?"

"No I don't think Figgins or Shue will be any help. But I do know of someone that just might help us out, Emma Pillsbury. She and I had a conversation about Noah today and she was the one that alerted me to how bad his mental state was." Carole sits next to Ruth trying to comfort her friend.

"I have an idea but it is going to take some planning and a lot of luck. We need Coach Sylvester in on this too. She always stood up for Kurt and I think she always had a soft spot for Noah." Burt looks at the other three adults before continuing in a low voice.

"We are going to set up a nanny cam in Noah's locker. We will need an empty locker close by to house the note book that will be recording everyone that passes by the locker and if we are lucky the stupid bastard will slip another note in Noah's locker and we've got him."

"What are we going to do to him once we 'got him'? What can we do?" Joe looks at Burt knowing full well what the slightly larger man would like to do, the same thing he would. Kick some ass. Except he thinks Burt might actually shoot the guy.

"We take the notes, film footage to the cops and explain that this guy has been harassing Noah. If Sue is in on it maybe she can help us get the guy expelled and the cops can handle the legal part. So what do you think?" Burt looks at Ruth for her approval and then to Carole seeing the slight smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

"I think if Emma and Coach Sylvester will help us it will work. Noah needs to feel safe again." Ruth nods at Burt.

"Are you sure you are only going to hand him over to the police Burt Hummel? I know you remember. I don't want you going after this creep with a blowtorch or a shotgun. If we do this we hand the guy over, no roughing him up or anything like that, got it?" Carole raises her eyebrows at her husband making him squirm in the wooden chair.

"Yeah I got it. What about you Joe? Are you going to be involved in this too?" Burt looks away from Carole's knowing stare. The woman knew him inside and out.

"I think I have the video equipment that we are going to need and the note book. So, yes I am in. Noah deserves someone fighting for him." Joe Lopez feels like he just made a deal with his daughter from the gleam in Burt Hummel's eyes. "Just no violence Burt, I am a doctor remember."

The adults continue their conversation until all the details are worked out. Carole and Ruth would go talk to Emma to ask for her help. The men would go talk to Coach Sylvester and ask for hers. Everyone agrees to meet up the next day at the school. Good byes are said with each adult vowing not to talk to anyone else about their plan, not even Noah.

Joe is the first to leave. Melina would be worried since his shift was over two hours ago at the hospital and he knew his dinner would be cold when he got home. He told Ruth to call him if she needed anything, that it didn't matter what time it was. Ruth thanked the kind doctor before he left.

Ruth asks if Finn can spend the night to help with Noah if he should wake up. Burt and Carole think it would be a good idea to let Finn stay the night. Burt talks with Finn before leaving tell him no matter what to stick by Noah in school the next day. Finn hugs Burt thanking him for letting him stay and that he will take care of Noah in school. Carole kisses both her boys goodnight before hugging Ruth telling her to call no matter what time it is if she needs them. Ruth thanks the pair for all their help.

Finn carries Noah back up the stairs to Noah's bedroom. He lays the snoring jock on the rumpled bed. He removes Noah's shoes, socks and jeans before covering the dark teen with a quilt. Finn takes his shoes off before settling down on the floor beside the bed. He wants to hold Noah, to comfort him but he remembers Noah saying how touching him hurt and he didn't want Noah to be scared or to hurt anymore.

He also remembers how Noah snuck out of the room without him knowing or hearing him so Finn tries to think of something that would alert him that Noah is leaving the room. Suddenly Finn has an idea. He grabs his Converse's and pulls the laces out of the eyes, tying them together he makes a slip knot on each end placing one over Noah's hand and the other over his own. If Noah did get up he would pull Finn's hand alerting him.

When Noah becomes a little restless Finn sings to him softly.

_Lying beside you_

_Here in the dark_

_Feeling your heartbeat_

_With mine_

_Softly you whisper_

_You're so sincere_

_How could our love_

_Be so blind_

_We sailed on together_

_We drifted apart_

_And here you are by my side_

_So now I come to you_

_With open arms_

_Nothing to hide_

_Believe what I say_

_So here I am_

_With open arms_

_Hoping you'll see_

_What your love means to me_

_Open arms_

_Living without you_

_Living alone_

_This empty house seems so cold_

_Wanting to hold you_

_Wanting you near_

_How much I wanted you home_

_And now that you've come back_

_Turned night into dayI_

_ need you to stay_

Noah calms at the sound of Finn's soft voice.

Ruth went to talk with Sarah after Finn put Noah to bed. She knew she had to explain part of what was happening to NoNo. Sarah was really too young to completely understand what had and was continuing to happen to her big brother. Ruth told Sarah that something bad had happened to Noah and that someone was still trying to hurt him.

The tiny dark haired girl was told by her mother that if NoNo started acting weird or crazy again that she needed to call her or Carole, it didn't matter what time it was, she had to call one of them. Sarah told her mother she would and that Uncle Burt told promised her that NoNo was going to be okay, that everyone was going to make sure he was. Ruth smiled through the tears in her eyes at her daughter's faith in Uncle Burt. Sarah slept in her mother's bed that night.

Ruth made a pallet on the floor beside Noah's doorway. She felt better knowing that she was closer to Noah. She slept very little that night just listening to the sound of her son breathing.

Both boys sleep through the night.


	12. A Soul's Peace

**A Soul's Peace**

**Chapter 12**

Finn wakes up first the next morning at the Puckerman household. He looks at the sleeping form of his boyfriend. The slight drool at the corner of Noah's mouth, the dark circles beginning to fade under his eyes. Finn smiles to himself as he watches as Noah begins to wake up. Stroking Noah's cheek tenderly Finn watches the long dark lashes flutter open. Beautiful bright hazel eyes look back at him with love.

"Good morning beautiful" Finn speaks almost breaking the spell. He watches as the pink darkens on the tanned cheeks. He slips off the shoelaces from around Noah's tanned wrist. "It was to make sure I woke up if you woke up." The pale jock replied to the questioning hazel eyes.

"Morning babe" Noah smiles slowly at the head perched on his bed. He can feel the slight peach fuzz stubble under his finger tips on Finn's goofy looking face.

Finn holds his breath as Noah's dark hand reaches for his face lightly tracing Finn's jaw line with calloused fingertips. The touch is like giving him candy or cake, he wants more but…

"I'm going to go…uh, use the restroom. I'll be back in a minute." Finn does need to use it but at the same time he doesn't want to push the smaller teen as far as affection, not after last night. And he knows if he stays there beside him he won't be able to resist the urge to kiss him.

"K. Hey Finn" Noah watches the lanky tall teen turn around to face him, "thanks for last..for everything." A shadow of fear flashes in the umber hazel eyes for just a moment and Finn sees it.

"We're gonna make it Noah. _You're_ gonna make it." Finn says the words with conviction and promise in his voice as he turns to walk out the door into the hall.

Noah smiles and believes Finn until his hand brushes the gauze patches taped across his abdomen. He begins to remember what he tried to do the night before. How the knife felt against his skin, the pain from the knife point as it entered his flesh. His mind going quiet each time he pushed on the handle. The pain almost felt good, welcomed in his mind. Almost.

Until Mr. H began talking to him about how he was important to everyone, especially Finn and Sarah. The pain turned white hot, burning with each word Mr. H said about them feeling this hurt after he was gone. Noah didn't want them feeling this way, he loved them too much for that.

His hands slide over the bump that is still too small for anyone to notice but he knows where it is and what it is, a baby. He gently rubs spot wondering how or if he could love the child growing inside of him. Noah makes a decision then reaches for his jeans pulling out the piece of paper with Dr. Joe's cell number and his phone. Sitting up in the bed he begins to punch the numbers and hit's the send button.

"Dr. Lopez" the deep voice answers on the third ring.

"Um, Dr. Joe, this is Noah Puckerman."

"Are you all right Noah? Do you need me to come over there?"

"I'm okay. Well not really but I'm not like I was last night. I…You said yesterday that if I needed anything to call."

"Yes I remember Noah."

"I need to. I want to come in and find out about the ba-baby. I need for you to explain all this to me if that's alright? I want to know what my options are."

"Can you meet me in my office around lunch time? I know it's a school day but I think your mother would be okay with you missing school for this."

"Yeah I can be there around noon. Uh, I'm going to ask Finn to come with me. I want him to know what is going on too."

"I think that is a good idea Noah. I will make sure that my assistant knows you are coming."

"Thanks Dr. Joe."

Noah ends the call. He feels more in control than he has since the rape. Mrs. P always told him that knowledge was power, he often disagreed with her saying that his guns were power but maybe she was right. The more information he found out the more options he would have dealing with the pregnancy.

Finn walks back into the room looking over his shoulder. "Dude did you know your Mom is asleep on the floor?"

"My Ma is what?" Noah looks at Finn confusion clearly on his face.

Finn points at the floor just outside of Noah's bedroom door. "She made a bed in the floor last night. I guess she was worried about you."

Noah gets out of bed and walks to where Finn is standing. He looks at his mother's small form curled up on several quilts with a pillow. Noah suddenly feels so ashamed for being mad at his mother, blaming her for all misery he has been feeling.

Ruth picked that moment to wake up seeing her son standing beside her makeshift bed. "Bubbe are you..okay?"

"Ma I'm so sorry for being mad at you. _I need you Ma_." Noah feels the tears slipping down his cheeks as a small hand reaches out for his larger one. "I'm scared Ma, I'm so fucking scared!" He falls to his knees beside his mother letting her hold him for the first time in years.

"It's going to be okay Noah. I promise you." The words spoken softly while she pulls him against her petite body. She holds her son for a long time, stoking the stripe of dark hair murmuring Yiddish words of comfort.

Finn watches for a moment and then walks back to sit on Noah's bed. He feels like he can relax for the first time in weeks. He can hear Ruth tell Noah to go take a shower and get ready for school.

"Ma I called Dr. Joe earlier and I am suppose to see him at lunch. I need you to write me a note saying I can leave early. I asked him if Finn could come with me and he was okay with it." Noah looks at his mother seeing the dark questioning eyes. "You know what is going on with my body, I don't and I want to understand it. I also want to know my options. I don't know what I am going to decide yet but I want to find out as much information as I can. I want Finn to go with me so he can understand too. I love him Ma and I don't want to make this decision alone."

"I think taking Finn with you is a good idea Bubbe. If the two of you are going to try and have a life together then you both need to make this decision. I will write the note for you, but I want one thing." Ruth looks at her son seeing his eyebrows raise. "I want you to talk to me, when you feel like you can, about your decision. I promise I won't tell you what to do, I just want to know what is going on. Okay?"

"Yeah, I promise Ma. Thanks for understanding." Noah hugs his mother before standing to go take a shower. He turns back to her. "I love you Ma."

"I love you too Bubbe." Ruth stands to walk to her bedroom to get Sarah up and ready for school.

Finn heard what Noah asked Ruth and called Carole to ask if she would call the school so he could leave with Noah. Carole said that she would drop off a note before lunch so that he could leave. She let him know that she thought it was a good idea if he went with Noah too. Carole also told him to take Noah by the garage when they were finished with Dr. Joe so Burt could talk to Noah. When he started to ask questions she told him that Burt would explain everything when they got there. Finn told his mother that he loved her and thanks for being such a cool mom.

The boys made it to school and found Santana waiting for them with Dave. Both looked pissed as hell.

"Why was my Dad at your house last night Puck?" Santana immediately fired at the tanned jock.

"It's none of your business San!" Finn glared at the Latina.

"The hell it isn't Frankenteen!" Santana is poking Finn in the chest with a well manicured finger.

Dave looks at Noah who is looking everywhere but at the two arguing/yelling friends. The dark teen looks like he is frightened of them and Dave doesn't understand that.

"Noah do you want to talk about it?" Dave asks in a gentle voice. "If you don't then we won't pressure you."

"I don't want to talk about it here at school. We can meet up after…I will text you both when and where. I have a couple of things to take care of today." Noah looks at Dave with gratitude showing in his eyes. He meant what he told Finn, he liked having Dave around him and he needed that comfort now.

"Okay. Just let us know and we will be there." Dave quickly hugs Noah before anyone could see. "Come on let's go to class." Dave pushes Noah towards the double doors of the school.

"San let it go until later. I promise I will explain everything then." Noah tells the bitching Latina over his shoulder as he heads into the school building.

CRB&J CRB&J CRB&J

Carole and Ruth arrived at the school that morning at the same time. Both women made their way to Miss. P's office after obtaining visitor's passes from the front office. They had decided to ask Miss P if she would open Noah's locker for the men to place the small camera in the vented slot at the top of the locker, but Emma came up with a different idea. There was an open locker right across from Noah's and it would give a better picture of the assailant, plus they didn't have to worry about Noah finding it. The women agreed and said that Burt would contact her and Coach Sylvester later about setting up a time to do this after school. Emma was glad she could help and asked how Noah was doing. After hearing what happened last night, she knew what she did with Carole was the right thing.

Burt and Joe made a visit to the school after the women so they would not cause too much gossip, plus they went straight to the coach's office. Sue was waiting on them with the blinds closed and locked the door after they entered. She had an idea of why they were there just not the total picture. Burt did most of the talking as it was a conflict for Joe to talk about a patient.

They both explained to her about Noah receiving the notes and why. Coach Sylvester had never felt such rage except when her big sister Jean was being picked on. She immediately agreed to help them in anyway she could including letting them in later that day to set up the camera and note book. Sue also said that she would keep an eye out for anyone that could be making trouble for the Jewish teen.

Sue gave them her cell number and said to call her when they were ready. She also told them if they needed her for any reason, including doing bodily harm to the perverted son of a bitch once they caught him, she would be more than happy to help. Both men thanked the surprisingly helpful coach and told her they would call her later.

Burt headed back to the garage and Joe back to the hospital to meet with Noah.

NF NF NF

Noah and Finn made it to lunch without too many dark moments. Noah kept thinking about what all the adults said to him last night about being there for him and it helped him to push the dark thoughts away. Finn was thinking about the appointment with Joe and what it would mean for them as a couple. _What if Noah wanted to keep the baby? What if Noah wanted to have an abortion? What was he suppose to tell him if he asked for his opinion? _Finn really didn't pay attention to his classes that morning.

Noah and Finn left before anyone could question them, Finn driving Noah's truck to the hospital. Joe's assistant showed them into his office telling them that he would be there momentarily. They waited without saying too much to each other before Dr. Joe walked in to his office.

The meeting with Joe is not exactly what Noah expected from the kind doctor. The explanations were easy to understand as Joe explained where the baby was actually at in accordance with his body and how most female pregnancies were nine months while a male pregnancy lasted between seven and eight months. The babies were smaller than babies carried by women.

When Finn blurted out "you mean he's carrying a dwarf?" The dark skin doctor couldn't help but snicker as Noah punched Finn's arm after the outburst. Joe explained that while the babies were smaller they grew up to be 'normal size'.

Joe told the uncertain jock that he could not participate in any sports or PE classes. He wasn't allowed to lift anything over twenty pounds and the weight limit would decrease to five pounds in the last stages of pregnancy. Which meant no working out in the weight room. Joe explained that a good diet and walking would help keep him in shape and it would also help the baby.

Joe handed Noah a bottle of prenatal vitamins plus iron tablets to take each day to help insure the health of both the child and the father. Noah tossed them to Finn.

"What about my options? I mean could I get an a-abortion?" Noah stutters on the word. He already thinks of it as a baby and not an it.

"Yes Noah you could. I explained to your mom last night that I would not advise it right now."

"Why not? I mean if I choose to get one."

"Noah you were raped and now you're pregnant. I'm Catholic so I don't really understand your religious beliefs but I would think they are as strong as mine. And also I believe that you could regret the decision.

Right now everything is overwhelming to you. You may make one decision today and wish you could have made a different one next week. Regret is something that you do not want to live with the rest of your life, not where a child is concerned at least.

You need help Noah. A therapist that can help you work out all the things that are making you want to give up on life." Joe knows he maybe pushing Noah but he believes if the young father doesn't get the help he needs they might not be so lucky the next time.

"I already talk to Miss P at school. And I am not really comfortable talking with someone else about it."

"I know you don't want anyone to know what happened to you, but a therapist isn't allowed to talk with anyone, including me, about what you discuss. It would give you a safe place to say whatever you want and not worry about hurting anyone with what you say." Joe takes two cards out of his desk drawer sliding them across to Noah.

"I think Dr. Joe is right babe. You need a safe place, a safe person. Please give it a chance. I don't want to lose you." Finn looks at Noah with an expression mixed with love and fear.

Noah reaches for the cards and reads the names on them. He hands them to Finn. "You make the appointment and I will try. I'm not going to guarantee anything Finn but I will give it a shot." He holds Finn's hand for just a moment before turning back to Joe.

"Is it too soon to hear the heartbeat or see the baby? I don't know why I want to see it but I do." Noah fidgets with his hands. "I have so many decisions to make, maybe it will make it more real for me."

"We can do an ultra sound, it is going to look like a tadpole or a peanut. It really won't start looking like a baby until about the end of the second month or the third month." Joe picks up the phone and has his assistant get a room ready for Noah. "They will have the room ready in about ten minutes. Do you have any other questions Noah? Finn?"

"Did any of my other tests come back positive? I mean like STD's or infections?" Noah looks straight at the doctor.

"No all your test came back negative except for the pregnancy test. I would recommend you being retested though in about six months, just to be safe." Joe offers the advice hoping the teen takes it.

"I have one more question Dr. Joe. I know that people use DNA tests all the time to prove paternity and I want to know if they can be altered to show someone else as the father of a baby?" Noah sits up straight, he can hear Finn's heavy sigh.

"I don't think I follow you Noah. The chances of a test showing the wrong father is, well, not probable. DNA doesn't lie, that is why the court uses it." Joe explains. "A baby will only carry the father's DNA and the mother's as well. Unless someone tampers with the samples or blatantly changes the results, which you can go to jail for by the way, the results are fool proof."

"Oh, okay. I just had an idea but I don't want anyone to go to jail." Noah looks at his hands with a sad expression.

Joe thinks for a moment, pondering what Noah just asked him and then it dawns on him exactly what the dark jock is thinking about.

"You want someone else to be the father of your baby don't you Noah? Someone besides the man that did this to you."

"Yeah. I mean if I decide to keep/have the baby I don't want the bastard to be able to have any contact with me or the baby. I don't want him in my life just because of the fact I am pregnant, you know, the first guy in Lima to be preggers." Noah tries to hide the fact he knows who the father is.

"If you decide to keep the baby we will have this conversation again. I understand what you are wanting me to do and that is something I will have to think about Noah. Okay?" Joe knows Roger will help him change the results but it would also free Noah's rapist from any consequences.

A buzzing from the office phone broke the silence, letting Joe know the room was ready for them. Joe leads them to a small exam room where the machine is already waiting for them. Noah lays back on the table and raises his shirt up over his stomach. Joe asks him to push his jeans down so the angle of the wand is better.

The gel is cold on Noah's stomach causing him to jump a little grabbing at Finn's hand. The tall teen simply holds the smaller dark hand in his own rubbing small circles with his thumb as Joe begins to slide the wand across the tanned skin.

"It's an alien dude!" Finn squawks out, pointing at the image as the tadpole comes into view.

"Shut it Finnessa! Is that it Dr. Joe? Is that the baby?" Noah looks at the odd thing showing on the screen. It has dark eyes and somewhat of a shape, but it does kinda look like an alien.

"That's it Noah. Like I said it is still too soon to hear a heart beat. You should be able to hear that closer to ten weeks." Joe watches the look of wonderment and awe cross Noah's face.

"Finn it's real. I'm really pregnant." Noah speaks softly as the tears begin to well up in his eyes. "What the hell am I suppose to do?"

"I don't know babe. I really don't know." Finn wipes the tears away from the tanned cheeks trying to think of something to say, but finding nothing helpful. Instead he kisses Noah's forehead softly telling the frightened jock, "I love you Noah."

"I want to see you in a couple of weeks. Just routine checkup procedure. And whatever therapist you choose, please let me know so I can send over your medical files. They may want to look at them before treating you." Joe turns off the machine, but he makes a copy for Noah first. He watches the loving gestures between the two teenage boys and sees the love they share. _He has a chance, they have a chance to make it through all of this and be a family._

Finn takes the copy from the Latino doctor thanking him for everything. He leads Noah out of the cubicle telling him they needed to stop at the garage on their way home, that Burt wanted to talk to him. Noah just nods his head lost in thought.

The drive to the garage is quiet. Noah looks out the passenger window thinking about what Joe told him, he didn't want to make the wrong decision. He doesn't want anyone going to jail for him. And he really doesn't want to go back to Juvie either.

Noah lost Beth because Quinn couldn't be bothered to give their baby a chance at a life with both of her parents. Now Noah has to make a decision of whether he could handle the baby's father being in his life. Or does he terminate the pregnancy? Adoption?

Noah makes an important decision at that moment and sends Dave a text message asking that he and Santana meet them at his house at six. He really needs to talk to Mr. Karofsky about the legal ramifications of what he is wanting to do.

They stop off at the Hummel garage. Burt leads Noah into his office and after a little bit of yelling and just a few tense moments between the two fathers a truce is reached with the newest employee of the garage is being sized for coveralls. Noah is actually happy for the job and the distraction. He thanks Burt and the boys leave for Noah's house.

The house is empty when they arrive, Ruth had to go in early to cover for someone. The boys walk up to Noah's room, the make shift bed is no longer in the floor beside his door. Noah sits on the edge of his bed watching Finn pace in front of him.

"Finn please stop." Noah's voice is filled with a soft plea.

"Babe I just. I don't know what I am suppose to tell you about the baby. I mean the fetus. I know why you want to get rid of it, but are you sure? I mean that's a huge decision. And if you keep it are _we_ going to raise it? Am I going to be a part of it's life? Your life?" Finn looks at Noah with tears in his eyes.

"I..Do you want to be a part of my life? Like forever?" Noah grabs Finn's large pale hand pulling him down beside him on the bed..

"Yeah I do. We have always been together. I even, maybe, want the baby alien too. If you want to keep it." Finn smiles softly at Noah as he calls the baby an alien.

"It's not an alien, it just looks like one." Noah returns the smile. "I want you to call the therapist but I want the one Miss P said was good. I trust her and if she is helping her maybe she can help me too."

Finn takes out his phone calling Miss Pillsbury asking for the number of the doctor she recommended and after writing it down he relayed a message to Noah about how happy she was that he chose to see someone, but she still expected to see him everyday. Noah smiled at Finn trying to impersonate the OCD counselor.

Finn makes the call setting up an appointment for Friday afternoon after school. He writes down the address and the time so that they would remember it. The receptionist asked if any medical records needed to transferred and Finn said that Dr. Joe Lopez would send them over. The lady told Finn the fax number to give to Dr. Joe's office.

Finn puts all the information on Noah's desk and when he walks back to the bed he hears…"Kiss me Finn." The words are barely loud enough for the Frankenteen to hear. Finn struggles in his mind for just a moment before kneeling down and gently pressing his lips against the full cinnamon lips. The kiss is slow and chaste. Foreheads are pressed together as dark hazel eyes search light umber eyes looking for any sign of repulsion or disgust.

"You are so beautiful to me Noah." Finn strokes the tanned cheek with his finger tips. He feels the slight heat creeping up the smooth skin as his boyfriend leans slightly into the touch. "I wish…I wish the baby was mine then there wouldn't be any decision to make. You, me, and ET we would be the most awesome family."

"ET? What the hell? First you called Beth, Drizzle…Now I'm having an alien baby so you named it ET?" Noah laughs as he shakes he head at the shocked look on Finn's face.

"It's better than Jackie Daniels." Finn scoffs at Noah. He leans in for more kiss holding the back of Noah's head still. The dark jock moans before breaking the kiss.

"Dave and San will be here soon Finn. I want to talk to Dave's father about the baby and I have an idea but I need to know something first….Will/Do you want to be the father of this baby? I mean if we can get past where this baby came from and why, could you handle raising ET with me? Like a family?" Noah chews on his lower lip while talking to Finn. A fear is coursing through him that the pale lanky teen in front of him will walk away forever.

"Noah I love you and this baby is a part of you. So yeah I would be glad to be the father. It's going to be hard for both us though, we both know this child came from an act of violence, but maybe we can make it work. My mom said something last night about the child being innocent and I believe that too." Finn takes both of Noah's hands in his, kissing the tanned skin along the knuckles.

The two boys share more intimate kisses than earlier, Noah whimpering as Finn lightly sweeps his tongue across the darker fuller lip. Finn smiles against his love's swollen lips as Noah tries to deepen the kiss even further. He pulls back, letting his hand rest on the dark jock's abdomen. A knock on the front door breaks the happy moment.

Noah goes to answer the door and Finn sets up the laptop, inserting the disk from Dr. Joe. Finn takes the laptop downstairs to where Noah is getting the third degree from Santana about last night.

"Tell me the truth Noah! Why was my dad here?" Santana is in full bitch mode and has Noah backed against the wall. "What happened last night?

"I'm pregnant San!" The harsh words sounded so foreign to everyone in the room. Santana burst out laughing while Dave pulled Noah into a fierce hug as the shaking jock said it quieter. "I'm pregnant."

"We found out last night." Finn says with authority to the room.

"So this is real Noah?" Dave looks down into Noah's terrified hazel eyes. He watches the dark skin jock nod his head as the tears begin to slip down the tanned cheeks.

"Yeah as real as it's gonna get. San, your Dad ran some tests on me yesterday and found out. _I freaked _out when my Ma told me the news." Noah tightens his grip around Dave's chest.

"What do you mean you freaked out Noah?" Santana doesn't like the way Noah is explaining himself or the way he is holding on to Dave like a life preserver.

"San just let it go." Finn warned her with a glare. He remembers what Noah told him about Dave but he cant push the jealousy down as he watches Noah cling to Dave.

"I…I tried to…I tried to kill myself last night." Noah whispered against Dave's strong chest.

Santana looks at Finn who nods his head yes. The dark Latina runs out of the house as a sob escapes her full red lips. She makes it to the front porch before the small dinner she ate at Sonic makes a reappearance in Mrs. P's flower bed. She wraps her arms around her small self as her body begins to shake. She feels long warm arms wrap around her from behind pulling her close.

"He's okay now San. Burt talked him out of it last night and I made an appointment with a therapist Miss. P recommended to Noah. He needs _you_ to be strong for him." Finn looks into the watery dark chocolaty eyes. "You have to calm down San, he needs all of us."

Dave is holding Noah as tight against his body as possible when he feels the smaller dark jock collapse into his body. He lifts Noah up and carries him bridal style to the couch. Pulling Noah across his lap until the Jewish teen is sitting on his legs, he strokes the stripe of almost black hair as he begins to talk to him.

"What happened last night Noah?"

"I couldn't take it anymore Dave, not after my mom told me I was pregnant. I woke up in bed with Finn on the floor beside my bed and I started thinking about the baby's father. I don't want him in my life or the baby's life. I didn't want the baby last night either. I just wanted it out of me and I wanted to die along with it." Noah sits up looking at Dave with solemn eyes.

"I took one of my Ma's butcher knives and I started to push it through my stomach before Finn found me, we got into a yelling match. Then Mr. H showed up and he talked me out of it." Noah pulls up his shirt showing the gauze patches peeking out over the waist band of his jeans. "I couldn't do that to Finn or Sarah. I couldn't make them feel like I do, like all depressed and shit."

Dave reaches out and touches the top of the white pad and tape. He looks at Noah with rage and fear in his eyes. Noah looks away.

"I went to see Dr. Joe today and he talked to me about the baby. I even got to see the alien looking thing. He also told me that I need help, professional help. I know I do. I know I have since Beth's adoption. So Finn made an appointment with this doctor that Miss Pillsbury said was the best, I go Friday after school." Noah sees the emotions in Dave's eyes and flinches when the larger jock brings his hand to his dark cheek.

"If you ever try something like that again I will personally stomp your ass into the ground Puckerman. Finn and Sarah aren't the only ones that need you. I need you too." Dave is so gentle when he cups the side of Noah's face in the palm of his hand. He kisses Noah's forehead before pulling him into his arms again.

"Thank you Dave. The only way I am going to make it is with all of you standing beside me."

"The only way you are going to make it is to be honest with us when you feel like doing it again. I am not as stupid as everyone thinks Noah, you are going to try again I know that. You are okay now but tomorrow or next week maybe different. So talk to us before it gets too bad again." Dave pulls away from Noah making him look in his eyes to see that he means the words that he is saying. "So you are having an alien baby?" Dave says with a smirk breaking the tension in the room.

"Yeah. You want to see it?" Noah actually sounds excited and happy.

"K. But first I think you need to go and check on San. She didn't sleep last night and she actually tossed two freshmen dorks in the dumpsters today after you guys left." Dave shakes his head at the memory.

"Wow! She really is in Satan mode." Noah stands as the front door opens and Santana walks in with Finn. Noah's arms are full of a fiery Latina speaking rapidly in Spanish. The Jewish teen surprises both Dave and Finn when he begins to speak Spanish as fluently as Santana. After several minutes and several hugs they both settle down on the couch.

Finn and Dave are sitting on the floor by the laptop waiting for the signal to play the disk. Neither teen understood exactly what the two darker teens said except for "best friends, rip balls off, love you, and you are totally stupid". Both are glad when Noah and San begin to speak English again.

"So let's see what it looks like." Santana looks at Finn.

"It's not an it, it's a baby." The three teens are shocked by Noah's calm voice. They watch as Noah's hand rests against the invisible bulge.

Finn starts the CD and they all watch as the 'baby' comes into view. Dave comments that it really does look like an alien as Santana stares in wonderment at the tiny image on the LCD screen. Finn pauses the CD and looks at everyone in the room, at the family they all have become, including their parents. Finn thinks that some people would think they are wrong in helping Noah and the ways that they are helping him but the Frankenteen knows the truth, sometimes you lie to save a life.

"Dave I need to ask a favor." Noah looks at the larger teen as he plays with the hem of his tee shirt. "I want to talk to your Dad about Finn being the legal father of the baby and not….the…_him_."

"Okay, I will call my Dad and see if he can talk to you. Be right back." Dave stands and walks outside to the front porch to make the call.

"What do you mean you want Finn to be the father of the it/baby? Aren't you giving it up?" Santana looks bewildered at the teenagers. She can't understand how Noah could want to keep a baby conceived in an act of violence.

"I gave up Beth and I didn't want to. I let everyone make the decision for me and I have regretted it ever since I signed the papers. It was one of the things last night that I could not stop thinking about when I tried to…I don't want anyone else to make a decision for me. Finn and I are making this decision because it is our future not anyone else's." There is finality in Noah's voice, a strength that hasn't been there since the rape. "And _we_ are looking at our options."

"Are you sure that you are not replacing Beth with this baby?" San looks at Noah watching for any lies or mistruths.

"No. I could never replace my daughter. No matter where or who she is living with she is still my daughter and I will always love her. But this baby deserves a chance to have a life with his/her father San. With both fathers, Finn and me." Noah looks at Finn waiting for his reaction. Finn reaches for Noah's hand pulling him into his arms. "We know this is going to be hard but it's what we both want."

Dave walks back in to the living room and tells Noah that his father is on his way. Noah asks Santana to call her Dad and ask him to come over. Before Noah can ask Finn to call Carole and Burt, the freakishly tall teen is already on the phone to his mother. The three teenagers look at Noah for answers.

B&J B&J B&J B&J B&J

Burt and Dr. Joe were with Sue setting up the camera and notebook when Carole called Burt and Santana called her father. Carole is already on her way from the Hudmel house.

Both men wondered what was going on that Noah wanted to talk to all of the adults except for his own mother. Burt and Dr. Joe decided to hold off any questions until they were finished placing the camera and the notebook in the locker in front of Noah's locker.

Sue was the suspect as they checked the angle and the peripheral scope of the camera as well as the clarity of the picture before heading off to the Puckerman house.

ALL ALL ALL ALL ALL ALL ALL ALL ALL

Carole was the first to arrive followed by Burt, Paul Karofsky, and finally Dr. Joe. The adults were led into the kitchen. Noah was sitting in his place at the old kitchen table. He asked Mr. Karofsky to sit down as he wanted to talk to him first. After mulitple questions regarding the legal mumbo jumbo of Finn being the father he asked Dr. Joe for the ultimate favor of in his career.

Burt and Carole stood in shock as Noah asked Dr. Joe to alter the DNA results showing that Finn, not his rapist as the father. When the startled parents were about to start arguing with Noah, Finn stepped up, "it is what I want too." Carole nodded her head understanding the love the boys share and the life they wanted to build together. Burt asked both boys if they were completely sure and the look they shared before answering said it all, they wanted to try.

Mr. Karofsky paled at the information that was being said out loud in the homey kitchen. He finally put his hands up explaining that he really did not need to hear about any illegal activities. But he could understand why the boys were doing this.

Dr. Joe asked Noah if he understood that once they do this there was no turning back, that the rapist could not be brought to justice. Noah said that he wasn't looking for justice, just peace in his soul.

Burt, Joe and Paul Karofsky all three thought there were other ways to get justice besides through the legal system. Everyone agreed to what was to be done the day the baby was born and that Finn would be listed as the father on any medical documents leading up to the delivery. The adults continue to talk and strategize about the pregnancy.

Noah and Finn watch as an unlikely group of people help plan their future. Dave and Santana walk to the couple, making an odd looking foursome. Santana kisses Noah's cheek telling him that she loves him and the alien brat. She punches Finn on the arm, smiling before calling him Papa. Dave hugs Noah and shakes Finn's hand in a gesture of friendship. Finn hesitates just a moment before pulling the former bully into a real hug surprising everyone, including the adults.

_Life and death. Both offer new beginnings and endings to life as we know it. _

_Hope comes from life as well as death, many not understanding the semblance of the two parts of the cycle needing to happen needing to be completed._

_Love is the tie that binds all of it together. From beginning to end. Love is there waiting, happening, choosing the outcome for us. It can sneak up on you or blatantly shove its arrow in your heart. _

_The love for a child is no different. _

_If given a chance love can grow anywhere in your garden of life. The weeds we pull that stifle the beauty are unnecessary drama that we allow to choke our lives, our love. _


	13. Destruction and Rebirth

_Sorry guys for the long wait for this chapter, but moving and job hunting has taken so much of my time. But now here is the next chapter. It is not what any of you are expecting but it was needed for the next ones. Homophobia exists everywhere today. In our schools, in malls, in restaurants, and our own neighborhoods. And it doesn't matter if you are a boy or a girl, pregnant or not. _

_Sometimes it is always darkest before the light can really shine and chase away all the demons/shadows. _

_Please let me know what you think as always. And I will be back to posting more regularly now. I love Southern Florida and the beach that is minutes from my home. Peace my friends and as always LOVE! Hemmy_

**Chapter 14**

**Destruction and Rebirth**

The next few weeks are spent with Noah becoming acquainted with the porcelain god know as _RALF_, to say he hated throwing up every morning was an understatement. It was happening in the mornings, at lunch, dinner and even in the middle of the night. Dr. Joe told him that it was different with each pregnancy and really different with a _MALE_ pregnancy.

Dr. Joe personally wrote and signed the letter to the school himself so that it could be in Noah's record in case anyone tried to say anything about preferential treatment. The teachers were told very little details of Noah's condition, only that his stomach was having bacterial issues and that he should be allowed to exit the classroom at any given time.

Most of the time it was Finn that would sit/stand beside Noah as he emptied his stomach in the white porcelain basin. The tall jock would drape a cold cloth across Noah's tanned neck to try and comfort the heaving jock. Words of love soothingly whispered in the stall of the boy's restroom were barely audible from the loving boyfriend. They were meant for the dark teen's ears only.

Other times it was Dave that would stay with Noah doing the same thing as Finn.

The students only concern was whether Noah was contagious or not. They really didn't care what was going on with him as long as it didn't involve them or make them sick. To them Noah was simply battling a bug that was causing him to lose weight. The baggy clothes he wore to hide the beginnings of the baby bump were a size too big and hung off of him.

The shrink that Miss Pillsbury recommended had help tremendously with getting Noah to talk about what had happened to him and about the consequences of keeping the baby. Finn had even started going to sessions with the therapist to help him cope with Noah's moods and to help him deal with loving a child that was conceived through violence.

Burt had taken Noah under his wing and kept a watchful eye on the pregnant teen. There were arguments, some loud at times, but Noah would always listen to Burt in the end. It seemed that Noah found the father figure he needed in his life, the rock solid wall to head butt when need be. Burt would catch him doing something that he wasn't suppose to be doing, like lifting boxes of parts, and the older man would simply raise his eyes brows at the tanned father to be and watch as Noah would stop; going back to sit behind the counter or sweep the already clean floor.

Everything was going great until Noah received a note in his locker before lunch. It simply stated 'meet me in the locker room at lunch, Dave'. He looked around but he could not find Finn to let him know where he was going, so he simply sent a text message to the tall teen saying he was meeting Dave in the locker room and to save him some lunch. He slipped his phone in his pocket as he walked out of the main school building to the sports wing.

He never saw it coming when he walked in through the locker room door. A large, black fist connected with his jaw and he went stumbling sideways toward a row of lockers. The hit stunned him for a moment allowing Azimio to hit him once again in the face. Noah wrapped his arms around his stomach to protect the baby and tried to curl into a ball on the floor.

"Grab him guys, it's time for the _Fag_ to learn a lesson from a real man." Azimio yelled at the other football players that he had talked into helping him bring Puckerman down a few notches.

The other three players grabbed Noah's arms and legs opening him up for Azimio to punch again.

Noah was struggling, trying desperately to get away from the larger jocks. He was screaming at them to let him go, to leave him alone. He pleaded with Azimio not to hit him in the stomach, but the dark skinned jock just sneered at him. His heart was racing and his breathing was becoming more ragged as he felt the walls closing in on him. It was just like that night, he couldn't fight back. He couldn't stop what was about to happen to him. The next blow makes him scream so loudly that it echoed off the concrete walls.

"You think I can just let it go that you turned my best friend gay? That I can just ignore that shit? YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A WORTHLESS BAG OF SHIT PUCKERMAN! A FUCKING QUEER!" Azimio screams the last part at the terrified jock before hitting him in the ribs hard enough to a cracking noise.

"Look at that boys the fucking FAIRY is crying now!" The laughter of the jocks begin to drown out the hoarse screams and the broken words from the dark wounded jock. "We are just getting started HOMO! I thought you wanted guys touching you! Don't you like it up the ass FAGGOT?"

Jake Davis one of the biggest linebackers on the team grabs Noah around the waist pulling the smaller body back against his crotch grinding his half hard erection into Noah's ass. "Just think Puckerman, I could spread your legs like a girl and make you beg for it just like I did with that dumb Cheerio last night. Pussy is pussy right? Since you like being fucked that means you are just a pussy too. How does it feel knowing you are not the top dog anymore?"

"PL-PLEASE! ST-STOP!" Noah is gasping for air now, he almost to the point of hyperventilating from the fear and pain coursing through his body. "NOT…A-AGAIN! TH-THE B-BABY! PL-PLEASE D-DON'T HUR-HURT IT!"

The footballers all look at each other in confusion at Noah's broken words. They are brought out of their thoughts as a blur of red and white letterman jacket is running straight into Adams sending him crashing into a row of lockers.

Finn had run into Dave in the cafeteria and asked him what he wanted with Noah in the locker room. When Dave responded that he had no idea what Finn was talking about; the boys along with Santana and the rest of their friends went to find Noah to make sure he was alright. Everyone had a sense of foreboding before entering the sports annex. Everyone reacted on instinct at the sight in front of them.

Dave headed straight for Adams letting his speed and weight send the dark jock hurling into the lockers. He continued to pound on Azimio after landing on top of him. Azimio could not fight back and tried desperately to block the punches from his best friend. But Dave continued to hit Adams until his face looked like one big purple bloody bruise.

Mike and Sam take out the two jocks holding Noah's arms ,while Finn went after Jake. Noah stumbles from the jerking motion of the three being pulled off of him. Mike and Sam eliminate their opponents with several punches to startled jocks faces and ribs. Finn had heard what Jake was saying to Noah as they walked in the door and in a blind rage was beating the teen to a nasty bloody pulp.

The girls; Mercedes, Tina, Santana, and Brittany catch Noah in their arms gently lowering him to the cold floor. Santana sends Brittany after a blanket and Mercedes after a water bottle as she clutches Noah to her chest. His breathing is rapid and jagged, body shivering from the pain and the cold of the floor.

"Baby I need you to breath for me. I know it hurts but you need to try and keep it under control. Remember ET, you got to do this for her. In and out, slowly." Santana tries to get Noah to listen to her. It isn't working as Noah keeps watching Finn and Dave beat his attackers senseless.

"San… make them… stop! Please… they are… going to…to kill them!" Noah's breathing becoming more labored with each word. He wraps his arms tighter around his baby as he feels a wave of pain course through his abdomen. "THE BABY! PLEASE! DON'T WANT TO LOSE IT!" He screams out before passing out in the dark Latina's arms.

"ARTIE CALL 911 NOW! TELL THEM TO SEND AN ABULANCE AND THEN CALL MY DAD! TELL HIM TO MEET US AT ER! NOW WHEELS!" Santana screams at Artie. She is holding Noah's still form in her arms, tears running down her cheeks. "FINN! DAVE! STOP! SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH NOAH! PLEASE STOP AND HELP ME!"

Artie is on the phone with 911 personnel telling them what he knows and that they NEED TO GET THERE LIKE FUCKING NOW! He is still reeling from the information that his brain is trying to process. Noah is pregnant? How? Who? Suddenly all of the actions of the four newly formed group made some sense. The four of them knew and they knew more than even this. Artie looks at the two teens whose fists are bloody from beating their opponents senseless.

Artie then takes the offered cell from Santana calling her father and telling him what was going on, the outraged and distraught Doctor told them he would get Noah to the ER ASAP that he would be waiting for them with a team.

Finn and Dave rush to be by Noah's side as Jake and Azimio are left moaning and crying from pain. Finn looks at Brittany and tells her to go get Coach Sylvester and Miss Pillsbury. He kneels down by his boyfriend and grabbing his hand, "Noah please wake up!", the pale Frankenteen pleads. Dave starts crying as he strokes the dark stripe of hair, "Noah don't do this, hold on to the baby, don't let go!"

Coach Sylvester and Miss Pillsbury appear with Principal Figgins following behind them. They all take in the scene in front of them. Miss Pillsbury calmly asks if anyone has called the parents yet and Santana informs her that Artie called her father telling him to meet them at the ER. Sue takes her phone out calling Burt Hummel and explaining the situation to him asks him to inform the other adults.

Figgins is trying to listen to Mike and Sam while keeping an eye on the rest of the group. He is told about the note that Azimio put in Noah's locker pretending to be Dave and asking Noah to meet him in the locker room during lunch. Sam tells in detail what they heard Jake and Azimio say as they were entering the locker room. Mike tells Figgins about the two other jocks holding on to Noah while Jake was…threatening to rape Noah. The words were hard for Mike to say, they made him want to throw up.

Figgins stares at the four boys in question not really comprehending the situation until he hears Sue on the phone. She is explaining the situation to a friend of hers in the Justice Department, it seems the terrifying Coach really was a member of the CIA among other things. After her brief phone conversation she turns to the short Indian and calmly talks to him.

"This is what is going to happen Figgy. You are going to take these four useless pieces of garbage to your office and wait for the proper authorities to arrive. They will be from the FBI, since this is a hate crime. They will take the garbage into their custody and their parents will informed by them what is going to happen to the miscreants. YOU ARE NOT TO CALL ANYONE UNTIL THEY ARRIVE IS THAT UNDERSTOOD? FAILURE TO LISTEN TO ME WILL RESULT IN YOU BEING CHARGED WITH OBSTRUCTION TO JUSTICE!" Sue yells at the shaking Principal.

"Ginger and I will follow the ambulance with the rest of this band of misfits so they can keep an eye on their friend. You will excuse each one of them from their classes for the rest of the day. You allowed this to happen in our school Figgins! YOU! You never took what these kids said or did seriously and now this kid could die because of it!" Sue looks at Emma for confirmation of what she just said to the terrified man. She watches as Emma stands from where she was kneeling by Noah and nods her head at the fuming Coach.

"You can't prove I did anything! It's their word against ours! And who do think the cops are going to believe? A bunch of FAGS or a bunch of football players?" Azimio croaks out from between his busted lips. "The school cameras don't work and nobody saw me."

"That's where you are WRONG scumbag! There is a camera in the locker across from Puckerman's. I know because I helped set it up and it works just fine! We knew someone was terrorizing the kid so we, his family and I, took action! So if I were you I would start thinking about a good lawyer and a good excuse for your parents, cause dumbass the government doesn't play by anyone's rules but their own!" Sue's face is red from anger and her body is shaking. She is fighting every urge in herself not to start punching the ignorant bully in front of her. "And that goes for the rest of you too. Your families are going to need to find all of you extremely good lawyers. Think about that as you go to Figgins' office."

Azimio pales at the thought of being caught and the rest of the jocks begin to confess that it was all his idea to begin with, to teach Puckerman a lesson. He turns to Dave looking at his former best friend tears slipping down his cheeks as he sees the tenderness Dave is showing to Noah. "Why? How could you let him turn you gay?"

"You dumb stupid son of a bitch! He didn't turn me gay! I have always been GAY! I just never wanted to admit it! I bullied Kurt all those years because he had more guts than I did! I have loved Noah for a long time! But he was never interested in me! He was only my friend! **AND YOU DID THIS TO HIM! YOU HURT HIM BECAUSE YOU WERE JEALOUS OF THE TIME I SPENT WITH HIM! DO YOU KNOW WHY I SPENT SO MUCH TIME WITH HIM? DID YOU EVEN CARE ENOUGH TO ASK? NO**!

**LET ME TELL YOU WHY I HAVE SPENT SO MUCH TIME WITH NOAH! HE WAS RAPED AT A PARTY BY ANOTHER GUY! DID YOU KNOW THAT JAKE? DID YOU EVEN CARE AS YOU WERE THREATENING HIM? WHEN HE WAS BEGGING YOU TO STOP, DID YOU EVEN BOTHER TO CONSIDER THERE WAS A **_**REASON**_** HE WASN'T FIGHTING BACK?" **Dave looks from the two jocks back at the fallen teen he was in love with.

"Dave don't! Please don't say anymore!" Finn pleads with the large angry jock beside him. He knows that Noah doesn't want anyone else to know about the baby.

"**NO! ITS TIME THEY KNOW WHAT THEY HAVE DONE! NOAH WAS RAPED AT A PARTY A FEW MONTHS AGO! HE WAS PASSED OUT AND SOME BASTARD JUST LIKE THE FOUR OF YOU, WANTED TO GET EVEN WITH HIM SO HE DID THE WORST THING HE COULD THINK OF, HE RAPED HIM!"** Dave looks at the shocked faces of the four jocks. The two that had been holding Noah were starting to cry. **"NOAH CARRIES THE GENE THAT ALLOWS MEN TO GET PREGNANT! HE IS PREGNANT BY HIS RAPIST! THERE IS A BABY GROWING INSIDE OF HIM AND YOU MAY HAVE KILLED HER AND HIM! ARE YOU GUYS FUCKING HAPPY WITH YOURSELVES? I HOPE YOU ENOY YOUR TIME IN PRISON, THAT **_**YOU**_** FIND OUT WHAT **_**HE**_** HAS BEEN GOING THROUGH FOR THE LAST FEW OF MONTHS!" **

The locker room door slams open as the EMTS rush in to take care of Noah. Dr. Joe had called a certain set of EMTS to go after Noah, explaining to them what the actual situation was and to drive like it was their own kid in the back of the ambulance, to get him there ASAP no matter what. They carefully placed Noah on the stretcher and loaded him into the waiting ambulance. "Who is Finn?" One of the techs asked the group as they were closing the doors. Seeing the tall crying teen walk towards them the tech tells Finn to climb in per Dr. Joe's orders. The ambulance tires peeling out of the school parking lot with sirens going full blast. Everyone else was left to follow in their cars.

Coach Beiste and Will arrive as the rest of the rag tag bunch is saying who is riding with who as the ambulance roars off with its sirens blaring a warning for everyone to get out of their way. Principal Figgins asks Shannon to help him get the boys to his office, he tells her will explain once they get there. Will looks at Emma but as he is about to speak, she does instead.

"Will I know you have a lot of questions but right now is not the time. I will explain everything to you later. Just help Figgins with those, those creeps please. And don't freak out when the FBI arrives to take them into custody." Emma quickly tells Will as she ushers Tina, Brittany, Sam and Mike to follow her to her little car.

Sue tells Dave to give her the keys to his truck, he is in no shape to drive. Santana, Artie, Mercedes and Dave ride with her; with Artie sitting in Mercedes lap. Santana and Dave ride in the back of the truck gripping the sides as Sue takes off out of the parking lot. Both holding each other's hands willing their friend to live and for the baby to live too. Neither one noticed the tears streaming down their faces.

The dark diva doesn't care how much she doesn't like Dave at the moment, she is truly scared for Puck/Noah as her mind reels from all the information she just received about the rape and the baby. She holds Artie's hand in her own seeing the smaller teen silently crying. She knows Artie and Puck's friendship had been going strong until a few months ago when this all this mess started happening. Now many things made sense to the dark diva.

Mike and Sam were quietly talking about the gene and what they heard Dave say about their friend. Raped and pregnant, the words echoing in their minds like a song. Mike has known Puck longer than Sam and he tries to explain to the blonde jock what he thinks will happen if Puck loses the baby. "Those four idiots better hope he doesn't lose the baby. Puck will kill them if he does. He gave up Beth after trying to fight for her, but Quinn wouldn't listen to him. So if he loses this one, he is going to go crazy and I mean _**really**_ crazy." Sam nods his head at the words spoken by Mike. The pale quarterback could also see Puck committing suicide if he loses this baby too. The rest of the ride is quiet.

Tina and Brittany are quietly praying for Puck/Noah. Both girls love the dark jock in their own way. Tina can't help but wonder how the Jewish teen had made it this long without everyone knowing about it. But then she realizes that Finn, Dave and Santana had protected the teen for the last few months and Puck the badass had somewhat re-emerged at school. She knew there was more to the story but she had never expected it to be that he was pregnant or raped.

Brittany can't believe that someone would hurt her friend like that, rape. It was a nasty word that left a bitter taste in her mouth after she said it out loud. Noah was always so strong and so protective of her, she just couldn't understand how just one person was able to do that to him. If she ever found out who hurt her friend she vowed to hurt them just as bad.

Emma Pillsbury was also silently praying for the traumatized teen. She knew his mental state was so fragile that he would not, could not, withstand losing this baby. It would destroy him. She swallowed back her tears trying to remain calm as she drove behind Sue to the hospital.

Finn is clutching Noah's limp hand as the EMT works on his boyfriend. IV's are started in the other tanned arm, while a BP cuff is attached to the bicep. The EMT checks for a fetal heart beat with his stethoscope finding a faint rapid heart beat. He looks up at the crying teen pulling the ear pieces out and motioning for Finn to lean over Noah's body. Finn allows the tech to put the ear pieces in his ears and he hears the faint heart beat for himself.

"Noah I can her! I can hear her heartbeat! You can do this babe! Just hold on! Dr. Joe can fix both of you! Please hold on Noah, please hold on to the baby!" Finn cries to his boyfriend clutching the dark hand harder. "I can't lose you both!"

The ambulance ride is short due to the driver's ability to maneuver the few streets of Lima. He drove the ambulance just like Dr. Joe told him to like there was no tomorrow for _his_ kid. The older man also knew that he could not discuss what was happening in the back of the van until both he and his partner were allowed to by the hospital. He was just having a hard time accepting the fact that there was a pregnant boy in the back instead of a pregnant girl. He said a silent prayer for the teen hoping for the best.

The younger EMT working on Noah feels the same as his older partner. He is doing everything he knows for a pregnant girl hoping it is the same for a pregnant boy. Hearing the heartbeat, the rapid flutter of a new life inside of the teen's abdomen was shocking but profound. The tech had heard of the gene but had never had the experience of knowing someone who carried it. He looks down at the limp teenager on the stretcher knowing the kid really didn't have much of a chance, neither one of them did.

The ambulance slowed down at the entrance of the hospital and made its way to the ER entrance. The driver didn't even take the time to back into the proper spot to unload the special cargo, he simply parked in front of the doors. He watches as Dr. Joe Lopez, Carole Hummel and Ruth Puckerman come running out the double doors with a trauma team in tow.

Sue and Emma park as close as possible to ER and everyone makes a heated run to the double doors where Noah and his entourage had disappeared through moments earlier. Sue was privately proud of the Ginger also know as Emma for being able to keep up with her driving. Sue was impressed and proud that the young woman was becoming stronger for herself and for the kids too.

As the group crashes through the doors they are greeted by Burt Hummel holding his wife and Ruth trying to keep them from going into the trauma room. Joe had asked Burt to make sure neither woman stepped foot in there, it was for Noah's sake as much as for their own. Joe had allowed Finn to be in the room as long as he stayed out of the way. The frantic doctor knew the Jewish teen would need someone strong with him.

The girls had immediately went to the two emotional mothers forming a protective circle around them as Sue and Emma pulled the women away from Burt so he could breathe. The boys did the same for Burt after Mike stole a wheelchair for Artie. It seems in their haste, Dave just picked up the small teen and carried him to the truck leaving Artie's wheels behind.

Burt asked Dave what happened and as the large jock explained the events, Sue explained to Carole and Ruth what she knew and how she had handled the situation. She assured the distraught mothers that the attackers would be spending a fair amount of time in jail. Emma smiled gently at the older woman when she saw the slight glistening of tears forming in Sue's eyes when she described what the one jock had threatened to do to Noah.

Once the adults were huddled together, Dave and Santana took their friends to the side to explain what had been happening with Noah. Dave did most of the talking as Santana kept breaking down in tears.

"Okay I need everyone to be quiet and to listen to me. Please don't interrupt me wait until I am finished before you start asking any questions. Okay?" Dave watched as the Gleeks nodded their heads.

"Noah was raped at the last party Santana had at her house. He was drunk and went upstairs to sleep part of it off before going home with Finn. He..He woke up in the dark room to someone raping him. He never saw who did, he only heard the guy's voice taunting him. Finn found him in the corner of the room crying and figured out what happened to him. San and I found the blood on the bed and Noah's letterman jacket on the floor.

We knew something had happened but we didn't know what until we confronted Finn later that night. We have protecting Puck at school, at least we were until today." Dave sees Mercedes about to interrupt and stops her.

"Not yet Mercedes. We found out a month ago that Noah is pregnant by the guy who raped him. He is a little over three months and we all have seen the baby that is growing inside of him.

When Noah found out he was pregnant, he tried to kill himself. He just wanted to stop hurting, to find peace. Mr. Hummel was the only one that Noah would listen to that night. Burt stopped Noah from pushing a butcher knife through his stomach." Dave cant continue as the tears from his hazel green eyes are blinding him.

Artie and Brittany are openly sobbing in each other's arms. Mike is throwing up in the waiting room trash can as Tina slides down to the floor wrapping her arms around herself. She knew that there had been more to the sudden friendship of the quad but she never expected to hear the mighty Puck had tried to commit suicide. Her thoughts are screaming NO! and her heart is breaking. Sam is trying to comfort Mercedes who keeps repeating "Sweet Jesus No!" over and over as her body jerks with sobs. Sam is simply just there, lost in his own thoughts of when he tried to commit the same violent act a little over a year ago.

Dave and Santana cling to each other, both frightened beyond words, beyond emotions. They had seen Noah hit rock bottom or so they thought until this happened, before this nightmare was added to the fragile jocks mental state. Both knew if he lost the baby that they would lose him too. And probably Finn as well.


	14. A Cocoon, A Heart Beat, and The Truth

**_Hey guys! Sorry about taking so long! But as with my fics moving got in the way and so did losing my notes. I still use pen and paper for some of my fics. And to Jason my love, I will be updating What did you do very soon. I found my flash drive today! And thank you my dragon for the words of encouragement! For everyone else thank you so much for your kind words and patience with me! The move is over and so is my job hunting….Yay kinda on the job part…But anywho please read and as always please review. And this chapter is a bit of a tease for the upcoming ones. Love Hemmy_**

**Chapter 15**

**A Cocoon, A Heart Beat, and The Truth**

After about thirty minutes, Dr. Joe appears outside of the trauma room doors leading a shaking and sobbing Finn. Carole runs to her son engulfing him to her smaller body trying to comfort him.

Dr. Joe begins to explain to everyone what is going on with Noah.

"Ruth I want to tell everyone what is happening with Noah. He is currently being prepped for surgery and Dr. Barnes will be doing the actual surgery. It seems that Coach Sylvester knows some pretty important people since he is being flown in from Columbus as we speak.

Noah is in danger and so is the baby. The embryonic lining has a tear in it and the sac itself has been dislodged somewhat from the abdomen wall. I do believe that once we stitch the lining and help to reattach it back to the wall Noah and the baby will be fine.

But I am not going to lie to you and say that this is going to be easy for Noah. He is going to spend the next couple of days being sedated to allow the healing process to begin and we may continue the sedation even further if his mental state is a threat to the baby. Noah and I talked the other day at his check up and he really wants this baby, but after the events today that could change as we know it is a possibility in this situation." Dr. Joe takes a deep breath allowing the information to sink in before continuing on.

"He has also suffered two broken ribs, a few bruises and his cheekbone was cracked from the blow to his face. But for now those are really the least of his worries." The Latin doctor turns Ruth to look at him. "I know you would like to see him before he is completely put under, please follow me." Both Doctor and Nurse feel the weight of the entire moment on their shoulders as they walk towards the elevator.

Dave asks that Mrs. Puckerman tell Noah that he was there; waiting for him and that he really does love him and the baby. The words cause Finn to cry harder as he pulls the former bully into a man bear hug. Both teens try to comfort each other before pulling Santana between them, holding on to each other. Their fallen friend is loved by all three with their entire hearts.

The rest of the Gleeks huddle close to each other as Sue and Miss Pillsbury try to offer words of comfort to the distraught group. Burt pulls his wife close to him whispering loving words to her, trying to calm her down. They had begun to view the child inside of Noah as their first grandchild and it was killing both of them that the little family could be destroyed because of hate and prejudice.

Emma tells Sue in a soft voice that they must 'talk' about the infamous Coach's past because she has never felt more proud of the usually vicious woman standing next to her. The nefarious Coach simply tells the ginger haired counselor that if she told her everything then she would have to kill her, her face totally serious as she quietly speaks the words. But at the last minute, she grabs Emma's hand to squeeze it reassuringly winking at her.

The kids pull Finn, Dave and Santana into the waiting room to find out how Noah was really doing since he had been in the room. The freakishly tall teenager tells them that when Noah came to in the trauma room that he was more worried about the baby than anything, but he was also extremely freaked out about the attack. "He loves ET and he doesn't want to lose the baby. If he loses the baby then I lose him." The tears begin to fall down the pale cheeks at the last sentence spoken.

The Gleeks had already thought of that possibility on the ride to the ER. They knew that Noah had been through too much to make it through losing someone else he loved with all of his heart. The kids were joined by the adults as Mrs. Puckerman finally returned from seeing her son.

"Noah is in good hands everyone. Most of the medical staff here understands the delicacy of the situation and the media is being kept away from this information. If you need to see Noah please call him Nora as that is how he is listed on the charts and the admission records.

The baby's heartbeat is still strong and Noah said to tell everyone thank you for caring about him. Dave he said to say, 'love you too man'. Santana, 'tell the bitch I ain't leaving her yet'. Finn, he said he already talked to you. Girls he said to tell you all that he expects kisses when he wakes up. Guys you aren't suppose to cry, except for you Artie, 'cause man I'm crying too, love you bro'. But he said to please come and see him even if he is asleep." Ruth breaks down at the smiling and tear filled eyes staring at her. Each kid had a different reaction to Noah's messages from small smiles to outright sobs. She understood why her son loved these people so much, because they loved him just as much.

"Oh Sue, Emma, you guys are the _**shit**_. Excuse my son's language, but I agree with him one hundred percent about that." Ruth tells the teachers as she calms down somewhat. Burt and Carole actually laugh at the words and the expressions on the women's faces, both shaking their heads in agreement.

"Well Mohawk is a good kid and no one deserves what he has been through. And neither do the rest of these kids." Sue gestures to the rest of the Gleeks. Emma wipes the tears away from her own eyes as she nods her head in agreement with Sue's words. Both adversaries developing a strange unique bond.

The next four hours are the worst for everyone, as waiting drives them all to become anxious and terrified as to why it is taking so long in surgery. Carole and Ruth understand but both mothers pace the floor more than the kids saying silent prayers for their sons and their child.

Dr. Joe and Dr. Barnes finally appear in the doorway and they both are hit with a barrage of questions from everyone. Burt finally uses his Papa Bear voice and tells everyone to 'SHUT UP' so the doctors can talk and be heard. The room gets eerily quiet as Dr. Barnes begins to speak.

"My name is Dr. Phillip Barnes and I will be the one treating Noah from this point on. We, the government, are going to keep this situation completely quiet. We want to be involved in this until the child is born and at that time we will still be involved but it will be more from an observatory stance instead of a hands on type of thing. I have been in charge of the care of the last four male pregnancies that we know about and all four were healthy babies. Noah's case is different due to the attack and his mental state due to the rape.

Each one of you must insure that he is kept in a cocoon of sorts, that nothing else can happen to him. You all must keep his spirits up and his stress levels completely at a zero level. Stress is the factor that I am concerned with the most.

We repaired both the lining and the abdominal wall, but it is going to be necessary to keep Noah completely sedated, for at least a few days to allow the stitches to take hold, no harm will come to the baby. I only foresee keeping him sedated a total of five days no more. But once he is awake he is going to be bedridden for at least two more weeks after that. He will be allowed to use the restroom but that is it, the rest of the time he is to be in bed and kept still.

The sac cannot be jostled, no sudden movements, no jarring movements such as falls or running into something. Once the stitches are completely healed then he will be allowed to return to a life as normal as possible during the rest of his pregnancy. No sports, no sex, nothing like that is going to be possible until after the delivery.

I am going to let Sue explain how the blackout will work about Noah's condition and I want you to remember that if you break the blackout code you will be hurting not only your friend but also his unborn child. The media and fanatical religious nuts will literally destroy this young man's life and everyone that is involved with him. So please remember that.

Ruth and Finn will be allowed to visit tonight. The rest of you will be allowed to visit tomorrow. If anyone has any questions please ask the nurse to page me and I will do my very best to answer anything that I can." Dr. Barnes asks Ruth and Finn to follow him as he leads the relieved pair to the recovery room. Everyone else descends on Dr. Joe asking how he really thinks Noah is doing and if the baby will survive. He answers honestly that he doesn't know.

Sue's phone rings and she excuses herself from the group to take the private call from a former superior in the bureau. Her face shows no emotions as she simply answers yes and no's into her cell phone. The news that she is hearing is not something she wanted to hear from the lead investigator that questioned the four jocks about the brutal attack on Noah. It seems Azimio Adams only put one note in Puckerman's locker, he had nothing to do with the other notes and the video surveillance video concurred with the dark jock's statement. It meant that Noah's tormentor was still out there and that made the volatile coach ballistic. She hears Dr. Joe call her name as she is mentally counting the ways to hurt the tormentor personally.

"Ah, yeah Joe. Sorry, that was headquarters." Sue takes a deep breath before going over the protocol for Noah's sensitive case. "As far as anyone else knows, Mohawk was roughed up by the four bastards that are now in custody. No one knows about the rape or the pregnancy and it has to stay that way. Should anyone ask you anything about Puckerman simply tell them he has a couple of broken ribs and a cracked jaw; that the hospital wanted to keep an eye on him. Once he is back to school the story will be that he caught a staph infection while in the hospital and was home bound until it cleared up.

What Dr. Barnes told you is very true. If any of you talk about this to anyone that is not involved in this directly or that is in this very room right now you will destroy Noah and the baby. And kids….Yourselves. Society does not look kindly upon men that are capable of having children…The fallout will be greater than if he and Hudson came out to the school as a couple.

Religious fanatics, freakazoids, hill-billy rednecks, anyone that sees this as either a chance to be in the lime light or further their idiotic causes will appear on everyone doorstep, on every news channel to spout has wrong this is and how the world is going to go to hell if it isn't stopped. And stopped in this case means destroyed. Remember that when the urge to gossip crosses your mind. What people don't understand, they kill. Just ask the Indians or other cultures that we have destroyed in the name of God or what is the right thing.

I am going to have a meeting with your parents so they will be aware of the crisis here and the possible legal ramifications if they decide to gossip as well. They have a right to know what is going on and I have a sworn duty to protect Noah Puckerman and his child. Now if you will excuse me I have some water boarding to do on four jocks!" Sue walks away lost in her own thoughts of exactly what she could get away with in the form of torturing the answers out of the jocks. She knew they had to know more than they were telling the other agents.

"I am coming with you! I want to hear what the assailants have to say for themselves. And if the water boarding doesn't work, maybe we can try some other form of torture you know Sue. They are going to tell us the TRUTH!" The ginger haired counselor is on a tangent as the two pissed off women head out of the hospital.

The Gleeks gather around Carole and Burt asking a million questions about how they were going to take care of Noah and the baby. The most common question seemed to be if it was alright to have sleepovers with Noah and Finn, they would help to take care of pregnant jock and Finn too.

Santana agreed with what most of the others were saying and she emphatically told Carole that she would be staying with the Hudmel's until the pregnancy was over. No one was going to hurt her best friend or her little niece or nephew ever again. She asked Carole what she wanted to be called, Grandma, Granny or maybe Nana. It seemed the dark skin Latina could read Carole's face like a book about the baby.

Carole sighed and quietly murmured _**Grams**_ in a sing song voice with a beaming smile on her face. And she looked over at Burt and gave him the name of _**Papa Bear**_. She had heard the kids talking about her husband before and the nick name the kids used for him. The love in the older woman's eyes was not lost on anyone in the group.

Burt looked at Carole when he heard the name _**Papa Bear **_and teared up at the sentiment. He had always loved children and having a little baby around was going to be 'totally awesome' to him. He wanted a little granddaughter, but he would be happy with a grandson as long as the baby was healthy and both fathers were too. The Mohawk'd brat had earned a special place in the barrel chested man's heart and so had the life growing inside of him. He was truly proud and in awe of Finn stepping up and being there for both father and child, claiming the child as his own. Burt wasn't sure if even _he_ could do that for any woman in his life.

Mercedes was quietly watching Dave from the corner of her eye. She watched as the large jock turned away from the group that was still talking about the baby and Noah; everyone wanted to see Noah, to make sure he really was alright. Mercy walked up behind the big lumbering jock when she noticed that his broad shoulders were shaking from quiet sobs. Gently wrapping her arms around her former enemy, offering comfort and warmth to the distraught teen.

Dave jumped from the contact, turning around he sees Mercedes with her arms open pulling him to her soft body. He only hesitates for a moment before allowing her to pull him down into a comforting hug. The pale jock openly cries into her shoulder while she strokes his chestnut tresses. _**'they're okay boo. We can protect them and make sure they stay that way.' **_She quietly croons as her own tears slip silently down her face. Mercy looks up from Dave's chest to find/feel the rest of the Gleeks embracing them; supporting them and each other. Burt and Carole join in like the protective bears they are when it comes to _**their cubs. **_

Finn watches as Ruth goes into the recovery room first. He can see the fragile woman reach for her son's hand. The soft pleading expression on her face leaves no doubt for Finn that she is telling him to rest and that everything is going to be okay. The freakishly tall teen watches as Mrs. Puckerman pulls her son's hand to her face and gently kisses the back of it, before leaning forward to place a soft quick kiss to the dark forehead.. The Jewish woman walks out of the small recovery room, "he needs you bubbleah, he needs your strength and love" before hugging Finn and walking towards the waiting room.

The tall teen nearly breaks down at the words and the Yiddish word spoken with such love to him. But he doesn't Noah needs his strength, his love right now. Taking a deep breath he walks into the room and turns around going back to the nurse's station asking the younger male nurse if he would follow him into the room, he needed to ask a favor. The dark haired male nurse smiled kindly at the upset teen nodding his head as he walks toward the room with the taller teen.

"I want him to hear the heart beat, he needs to hear ET's heartbeat so he will know that she is okay. They always say that someone in a coma can hear, that they can hear voices and stuff. I want Noah to hear our baby. Is that okay?" Finn asks in a shaky voice as the tears gather in his eyes. He sees the machines that are connected to Noah's body, the tubes and wires make the pregnant jock look small and delicate to Finn.

"I think the doctor would be okay with that, let me go get my stethoscope." The male nurse can feel his own tears threatening his eyes. He had been briefed on the patient and everything surrounding the strange but sad case. He would help the teens anyway he could. He walks out of the room and returns in just a few seconds with his and finds the heartbeat for Finn. "You first Finn. You need to hear it too."

The young nurse pulls out the earpieces while holding the amplifier to Noah's abdomen.

Finn smiles as the tears slip down his cheeks hearing the steady fast beat of the small heart inside of Noah, "your turn babe". He pulls the earpieces out and gently places them in the dark teens ears praying that Noah can hear the rhythm of the small heart. "That's our baby Noah. She is doing good and you just need to rest so you can get better. I love you both babe. I will be right here waiting for you." The lanky teen softly cries to the love of his life.

Finn stays in the room for a while after the nurse leaves just holding Noah's dark smaller hand in his own larger pale one. He notices the dark bruise on the left side of Noah's cheek from Azimio Adams. The feel of hatred burning through his veins at the thought of what almost happened to Noah again and how they almost lost ET.

He shakes the feelings off as he remembers people can pick up on 'vibes' and he doesn't want Noah to feel the anger coursing through him. He sings a song his mother used to sing to his father when he was real little and he understands the pain she felt at losing his Dad.

**_Oceans apart _**

**_day after day _**

**_And I slowly go insane _**

**_I hear your voice on the line _**

**_But it doesn't stop the pain_**

**_If I see you next to never _**

**_How can we say forever _**

**_Wherever you go _**

**_Whatever you do _**

**_I will be right here waiting for you _**

**_Whatever it takes_**

_**Or how my heart breaks **_

_**I will be right here waiting for you **_

_**I took for granted, all the times **_

_**That I though would last somehow **_

_**I hear the laughter, **_

_**I taste the tears **_

_**But I can't get near you now**_

_** Oh, can't you see it baby**_

_**You've got me goin' CrAzY**_

_**Wherever you go**_

_** Whatever you do **_

_**I will be right here waiting for you**_

_**Whatever it takes **_

_**Or how my heart breaks**_

_**I will be right here waiting for you **_  
><em><strong>I wonder how we can survive <strong>_

_**This romance **_

_**But in the end if I'm with you I'll take the chance**_

_**Oh, can't you see it baby **_

_**You've got me goin' cRaZy**_

_**Wherever you go **_

_**Whatever you do **_

_**I will be right here waiting for you **_

_**Whatever it takes **_

_**Or how my heart breaks**_

_**I will be right here waiting for you**_

The nurse walks back in telling him they need to move Noah to his room and that they would let him know when he could come back in. The male nurse suggests he go and grab something to eat or just take a walk to clear his mind. He assures Finn that they will alert him or Mrs. Puckerman to any changes. Finn thanks the nurse and kisses Noah's lips before leaving the room. He notices the soft expression on the nurse's face there is not any disgust or repulsion anywhere on it. He knows Noah is safe with this man.

Finn walks down to the waiting room to find the Gleeks still trying to comfort each other. His Mom and Burt talking quietly with the teenagers about how important it was to keep Noah's secret, just that a _**secret**_. When Mercedes asked _'were they allowed to talk to Kurt about it'_, Dave went into a blind rage and stormed out of the room to the ER parking lot. Finn knew at that moment Dave knew more than he was telling so he followed him outside.

Burt Hummel also watched how the larger jock reacted and decided just like Finn that Dave knew more than he was telling anyone. Papa Bear made a mental note to get the jock alone and find out exactly what the jock was keeping from them. He also decided that Kurt didn't need to know what was going on, that he loved to gossip too much for his own good.

Outside Finn walks up behind Dave who is holding something in his hand, "what the hell is going on dude?" He watches Dave stiffen at his words shoving the object back into his jean pocket before turning around. "What the hell do you have against my brother knowing about Noah and ET? What the hell do you know that I don't?"

A/N: Richard Marx Right Here Waiting For You is the beautiful song I chose for Finn to sing to Noah Give it a listen It really is beautiful!


	15. A Walk of Love and Hope

_Hello my friends! I am happy to say that this piece is more filler and a little bit angst. But it is important to the story. Please let me know what you think as always. Next time the update will be sooner. Hemmy_

**Chapter 15**

**A Walk of Love and Hope**

Outside Finn walks up behind Dave who is holding something in his hand, "what the hell is going on dude?" He watches Dave stiffen at his words shoving the object back into his jean pocket before turning around. "What the hell do you have against my brother knowing about Noah and ET? What the hell do you know that I don't?"

Dave tries to walk past Finn but is stopped by the Frankenteen's hand on his bicep.

"What the hell did you have in your hand Dave? I have a right to know what you know! I love Noah and ET! SO TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW!" Finn's hold tightens on Dave's arms to almost bruising force as his voice booms across the parking lot.

"I promised Noah that I wouldn't tell until he is ready to actually say the guy's name!" Dave looks at Finn, eye to eye. "I made a promise to him and I am not going to break it!"

"SO YOU KNOW WHO DID THIS TO HIM? HE KNOWS AND HE HAS NEVER TOLD ANYONE BUT YOU?" Finn is screaming now at Dave, his face a bright ugly red. "HOW LONG HAVE YOU KNOWN?"

"Since the night it happened. I found something in the room after you guys left. I picked it up and put it in my pocket. I know who it belongs to and I confronted Noah about it that day in the locker room after he ran out of the choir room." Dave takes a deep breath willing the tears back down. "He begged me not to tell anyone since it happened to him and not me. Finn I couldn't and still can't break my word to him. He has to be the one to tell us who did it! We can't force him to tell us. Especially not now, not after what Dr. Barnes just told us in there. The stress could kill both of them and I am not ready to lose either one of them. Are you?"

"FUCK! FUCK IT ALL TO HELL!" Finn screams at the top of his lungs. "Why wouldn't he tell me who did it? Why?"

"Think about that Finn. What could be his reason other than making it real, making it so he could never forget about who or why they did it to him." Dave tries to subtly hint to Finn who was responsible for the rape without saying anything. "Maybe it just isn't himself he is protecting. Maybe it is someone he cares about and doesn't want to see them get hurt either."

"What? He cares about the guy that raped him? That doesn't make sense." Finn's face is a mixture of disgust and bewilderment at Dave's words.

"No I am not saying that he cares about the guy that raped him, but maybe if he said who did it, it could affect the person he truly does care about." Dave feels like he is have a conversation with a brick wall. Santana was right, Finn could be truly dense at times.

Finn makes a grab at Dave's pocket where the object is hidden and the boys scuffle for a moment before Finn pulls out the small object and nearly pukes on the pavement. His world is turned upside down at that moment, blurring around everything but the simple small thing in his hand.

"It's not possible. There is no way that it could be him." Finn takes gulps of air trying to calm his raging and panicking emotions. None of this made any sense to the tall pale jock, none of it. _'The notes weren't in __**his**__ handwriting.'_

"But it is. And now that you know, you have to promise me that you will let Noah tell you when he is ready. You can't go in there and start demanding answers from him, they have him in a coma remember? Let him tell you on his own." Dave knows it will be the hardest secret Finn will ever keep but…The freakishly tall teenager has no choice really.

"Does Santana know?" Finn looks up from the small offending object in his large hand.

"Do you think the fucker would still be alive if she knew?" Dave takes the thing back and puts it in his pocket that is torn after the scuffle with Finn. "We are the only ones that know and it has to stay that way."

"I wont say anything until the baby is born, but then all bets are off. I am personally going to fucking kill the bastard that did this to him." Finn looks at Dave with fury blazing in his eyes.

"Stand in line bro. I am going first. Don't worry, he will pay for what he did to Noah, in blood." Dave's jaw snaps shut with finality at the last two words.

"We better go back in now before everyone wonders what is going on with us." Finn starts to walk towards the ER entrance with Dave following behind him.

Neither teen knew that Burt Hummel had been watching and listening to the entire confrontation from the side exit of the ER. He had followed Finn out of the waiting room to ask him what Dave Karofsky's problem with Kurt was and stopped when he heard the conversation. He was not pleased with the words he heard or the object he barely recognized in the overtly large pale hand of his adoptive son. He quickly slips back into the hospital before the teens can see him. _They/I know who did this to the brat! I recognized it? How the hell could he do something like this to another person? _

The Gleeks all visit Noah during the medically induced coma. Sometimes they would sing songs, other times they would simply tell him about their day at school. It was hard seeing the once formidable force of Noah Puckerman reduced to a lump in the middle of a fortress of soft pillows. The machines keeping a somewhat steady rhythym of both father and child's heartbeats along with the beeps of the other monitors in the room. Yet most of the Gleeks ignored the sounds or felt they were comforting in the knowledge that Noah was still with them.

Burt and Carole visited as often as their jobs allowed them; always talking about the baby and how much they loved both of them. Carole would stroke the stripe of almost black hair hoping that he could feel it, sense that she was there with him.

Burt would make a fuss about how the shop wasn't clean enough or how he couldn't find parts that Noah inventoried, telling the slumbering teen that he better get well quick so he could come back and do his job. Burt would also mumble about how much he missed the brat and he wasn't talking about his grandbaby either. But he would wait until no one else was in the room to hear him say those words.

Ruth would tell Noah about Sarah's day at school and how everyone in the hospital was thinking about him. She would tell him about how Nana Connie was promising to make as many cookies as he could eat if he would just get better and be able to go home soon. She would share things about when she carried him for nine months and how they were the happiest days of her life when was pregnant with both Noah and his sister. Sometimes she would simply hold his hand willing her only son to make it through this dark period of his life.

Finn would quietly cry sometimes, other times he would make plans for them. About leaving Lima behind them, making a life after college for them. How he wanted to name the baby Carawyn for his mother and Noah's mother.

Dave would just sit and hold Noah's hand softly humming to him some old rock ballad or Top Forty Hit of yesterday. He never knew what to say to the sleeping jock. There was so much he wanted to say but he felt it was wrong for the simple fact that Noah was so in love with Finn. And Finn loved the sleeping beauty just as equally. Dave would settle just for being friends and an uncle to ET. He would settle just to know the pregnant jock was okay and loved even it meant being loved by someone other than him.

Santana would gently clean his face and hair with a cool wash cloth while telling him about all the cute baby stuff she found on the web. She also informed the dark skinned teen that she would be living with him until further notice, to make sure he stayed out of trouble. She would tell him everyday how much she loved and needed him in her life before going home so someone else could sit with him for a while.

Brittany and Tina both brought stuffed animals and placed them on either side of the quiet teen to protect him from bad dreams. Tina brought a beautiful soft dragon and Brittany brought a Unicorn. They decided the magical creatures would keep him safe.

Mercedes brought a star of David and hung it on the wall above his bed. She had more respect than to hang a crucifix since Noah was a self proclaimed 'badass Jew'. Ruth had even thanked the chocolate skinned Diva for her thoughtfulness.

Mike, Artie and Sam each talked about the latest in video games and who was actually beating the last high score Noah had earned at their 'balls to wall' all night gaming session.

Privately each young man cried for their friend who they knew was far from being okay even after he woke up. Each one knew in their own way what it was like to hide who they really were, to be so afraid of being who they really are deep inside. But only one had tried to follow the same 'out' as Noah.

Sue and Emma kept a close eye on the pregnant teen as well. Emma knew from the daily chat sessions in her office that Noah loved to read. She would come in after everyone else had left and read from one of her favorite books, Pride and Prejudice. Sue just held the dark skinned hand in hers and let her own fierce presence be felt rather than heard.

Noah 'woke' in a playground park watching two beautiful little girls play together. They were playing with their dolls and singing silly made up songs to them. One of the little girls was older than the other. The bigger girl had long blonde curls cascading down her back while the other smaller girl had dark hair flowing down past her shoulders. They squealed with they saw him, dropping their dolls onto the ground before running towards the surprised teenager.

"Daddy! You're here! Come and walk with us!" Their voices filled his head, a sing song lilt of words.

Each girl grabbed a strong hand and began to walk down a path towards a field behind the park. His heart swelled with love for each of his daughters as his hands felt the warmth of their touch as he walked with the girls scenes from his past as well as his future played out ahead of him.

A scene of the day Beth was born, the only time in his life he ever held his first born daughter. He could feel the warm tears slip quietly down his cheeks. "Don't cry Daddy, you will find me again." The petite blonde tells him in a shy but firm voice as she holds his hand tighter.

The next scene is one of Finn kissing him while they both dressed in white suites. He can see a cake behind them with Carole and his mother both crying. Burt is holding the dark haired girl in his arms as he cheers them on. It is their wedding day. "Pappa loves you so much Daddy! Just like we love you too!" The small brunette holds his hand tightly and stage whispers, "it isn't happily ever after but its full of love."

Noah continues to walk with his daughters listening to them talk and giggle about boys, their grandmothers and Papa Bear who has a shotgun just for the mean old boys who bother his cubs. The words they speak aren't clear to his foggy mind but the intense feeling of love and hope surround his body and soul.

He can hear music and his friends talk about things too but they are like his little girls, the words muted but the warm peace engulfs him. He can feel the protective aura of Dave when he is in the room and the hurt/love from Finn. Santana makes him feel warm and fuzzy in a strange way, it should really scare him but it doesn't.

He spends five days walking with his munchkins, holding hands, laughing. The safe haven his mind had created for him protecting him from all the drama of the outside world.

The big day finally arrives for the coma to be slowly lifted from Noah. The medication is decreased over a ten hour period of time allowing the olive skinned jock to awaken 'naturally', without being forced abruptly awake. The increase of his heart rate being the only indication at first of the REM stage of sleep being vacated by his mind.

Finn sits beside the bed holding the smaller hand in his own while rubbing small comforting circles over the un-bandaged side of Noah's abdomen. The small flutters he feels under the palm of his hand surprise him but at the same time reassure his troubled mind.

Dr. Barnes sits in the room quietly going over the last readings from the machines and waiting for the patient to fully awaken. He was ready to do battle to save the young man's life. He had talked with Finn about the preperations for Noah's care once the smaller jock was released from the hospital.

After several loud and heated arguments with all the adults, Dr. Barnes, Dr. Joe, Ruth, Carole and Burt; a decision was made by Dr. Barnes. Noah would be placed in a home that could be totally protected at all times and one that the doctor would be a constant presence in also. The Gleeks made sure the good doctor also understood that he needed a house big enough to house them as well.

So Ruth Puckerman, on a surgical nurse's salary, leased one of the largest and oldest houses in Lima. It had once been a home to the mayor and to one of the major stockholders of the locally owned Lima Merchant's Bank. Five bedrooms and three baths would give space along with the formal living room and the den; for everyone to sleep and stay clean. The government would pick up the tab for all the rents and utilities for the house.

Agents would be stationed at the home as well as school. Dr. Barnes was pleased with how fast the arrangements were made and how well both the school and hospital was complying with the directions of the government. He raised his head when he heard Finn talking to Noah encouraging him to wake up.

"Come on sleepy head, open those big beautiful hazel eyes for me. I have missed you so much baby." Finn gently coos to his boyfriend. He watches as the long dark lashes begin to flutter open. "That's it Noah."

"Fffnnn" the hoarse and raspy voice is barely audible in the quiet room. The slightly pale eyelids begin to raise slowly as his hand clutches Finn's as if it is a tether to his soul.

"You're safe Noah. You are in the hospital remember? The baby is fine. You have to stay calm babe. YOU ARE SAFE." Finn squeezes the hand clutching his reassuring the groggy jock. He places Noah's hand where his other hand had been rubbing circles on the tanned skin. "She is doing fine."

Finn was fighting the urge to wrap the fragile jock up in his arms, to hold him close, to let him feel the warmth and safety of his embrace. He was also fighting the urge to yell at the sleepy form, to berate him for not telling him who raped him, who impregnated him with a child. It changed everything, except how much he loved Noah. He was the father of ET on paper and in his heart, no matter who the paternal father was, Finnegan Hudson was the one who was the true father.


	16. Can You Believe It?

_Hello my friends! This is actually two chapters in one. The beginning is starting to narrow down the suspects and the rest is a lead in for the next chapter. I want to thank all of you that reviewed and were patient enough to wait for this next chapter. Please let me know what you think. Peace Hemmy_

**Chapter 16**

**Can You Believe It?**

Two figures sit in a dark corner of a public library. A quiet conversation is barely audible concerning one Noah Puckerman…..

"So how did the meeting with those two little twits from McKinley go? Did they have anything to say about Puckerman?" One asks the other.

"I don't like what we are doing….what we/I did was wrong! He didn't deserve that! No one does!" A hand pinches the bridge of a nose as shoulders hunch from a dark burden.

"It's too late to have regrets or pity for the man responsible for what he did to our friend. He got what he deserved and from what I hear from the grapevine, the jocks added to his misery!" An evil laugh is muffled by hand quickly covering the smiling lips. Composing himself he asks again, "What did you learn from the two self centered little bitches?"

"He hasn't been to school all week. None of the former Glee club has been in class since the attack on Puckerman. Some think he is simply recovering from the beating from the jocks. Some think he has some diease and that he is dying from it.

There is one rumor in particular they told me about but Quinn is dismissing it as nothing more than gossip. They heard one of the jocks was screaming how he didn't know about Puck being pregnant as he was placed in a police car when he was arrested for attacking the reject." A violent shudder goes through the hunched over body. "I….I could be a father."

"Holy shit! He carries the gene? Are they sure?" A bewildered look crosses the hidden face.

"Quinn holds a platinum card in bible thumping, she doesn't believe in the gene. She thinks it's the devil's work if a man claims he can get pregnant. Neither girl knows for sure. But it could be possible. I mean I know it is a small percentage but it is still a possibility. What am I suppose to do?" The voice cracks showing the distress in the teen.

"WE find out what is really going! It shouldn't be that hard if he is in the hospital." The tone of the other teen is beginning to show his impatience with his friend.

"That's just it. I called the hospital and they have no record of him ever being admitted, but the receptionist did say that they were under tighter security due to something with the military. That is all she would say."

"The Military? What the hell?"

"I don't know! That is all she would tell me! What are we going to do?"

"We are going to go to the hospital tomorrow and find out what is really going on! I have read stories about the government stepping in during a male pregnancy to ensure the safety of both the father and the child. You know the world is not ready for that, they think it is a sin like that stupid little Cheerio does."

"So what we are just going to walk in and demand to see Puckerman?'

"No you stupid idiot! Remember when we had that party last year and dressed up like orderlies? We do that again except we are playing for real. All we need are some scrubs and a couple of phony ID badges. No one is ever going to notice we are there. We snoop and then we leave. It's a piece of cake as long as you don't freak out and get us caught!"

"Oh Shit! He found us. Do we tell him what we are doing? That I could possibly be a father?"

"NO! He doesn't need to know anything yet! And exactly how were you going to tell him? Hey just thought you would like to know that guy I fucked like he did you, well I got him preggers? I don't think so."

"What if he really is pregnant? What if I am really the father? How do I deal with Noah Puckerman being in my child's life?"

"If, and that is a big IF right now, he is pregnant we will simply prove he is an unfit parent and that won't be that hard from his background and criminal record. You and lover boy get the baby to raise and Puckerman is left with nothing. Isn't that what we wanted all along was to hurt the bastard the way he hurt the guy you are in love with?"

"Oh GOD! What am I…."

"Stop with the dramatics! We simply finish this! We are in too far to do anything else!"

A third young teen joins them ending the heated conversation.

"Hey guys I was looking for the two of you." A familiar voice greets the two teens.

Noah's room

"Where am-am I? Finn! The baby? Lessie Grace?Beth? Where are they?" Noah's voice is rising with each word. The memories of the last few days are more than memories to him, _they actually happened to him. _

Finn struggles to be gentle both with his actions and his words as he tries to calm and sooth his terrified boyfriend. The gentle ministrations from Finn; holding both of his hands, stroking the dark stripe of hair and the stubble on either side of it do little to quiet the panicking teen.

"Who are you talking about Noah? Who is Lessie Grace?" Finn searches the still cloudy hazel eyes for some type of sane answer. "You know Beth is with Shelby Cochran. Noah PLEASE CALM DOWN!"

"Our daughters! They were with me at the park! Why am I in the hospital? Are they okay?" Noah still cannot comprehend that it was just a dream. He felt them touch him, heard them laugh, marveled in their smiles. He tries to free his hands, twisting his body before screaming out in pain. "WHERE ARE MY CHILDREN?"

"MR. PUCKERMAN! CALM DOWN BEFORE I SEDATE YOU AGAIN!" Dr. Barnes all but shouts as loud as he possibly can at the struggling father to be. "If you keep fighting Finn you will lose the baby! And I did not repair the damage that was done for you to rip it apart." The smaller man walks up to the side of the bed pulling out a syringe as he nears the young man.

"Mr. Puckerman you have been in an induced coma for five days. You were dreaming, a dream that your subconscious knew would comfort you. You are still pregnant. Do you remember anything before the dream?" Dr. Barnes uses the most sincere voice he is capable of speaking.

"It was so real Finn. I talked to them. Held their hands." Noah can feel the tears slipping down his cheeks. "They said they loved me…It was all a dream?"

Finn looks into the questioning orbs wishing he could take away all the pain that was going to come back to Noah. "Yes babe it was just a dream. Do you remember the locker room? What happened there?"

Noah closes his eyes as the images begin to flash. "The baby! Is she okay?" He places his hands over his bandaged abdomen searching for the small bump that had just begun to really show. "I remember Azimio…what he and Jake said to me! They were going to….You and Dave were fighting them…Is ET okay?"

"The baby is fine as long as you stay calm and don't move around baby! Please lay still and listen to the doctor okay? He saved you both! I thought I was going to lose you both!" Finn tries to remain calm but it is getting harder as the memories from the last few days run through his mind.

"Gentlemen! Both of you PLEASE CALM DOWN!" Dr. Barnes knows that both boys are emotional but he has to think about the baby above everything else. "Noah tell me how you feel? Is the pain bearable?"

Both boys look at the doctor with wide eyes, the strict no nonsense tone bringing them back to themselves. With jerky movements Noah places his hand on the baby bump next to Finn's.

"She is okay? I mean everything is going to be okay?" Dark hazel orbs stare at the doctor waiting for an answer.

"So far everything is good. The rip in the embryonic line is healing and her vitals are strong. It's your mental state that has me worried Mr. Puckerman. If you cannot stay calm and keep your movements to a minimum YOU WILL LOSE THIS BABY! Do I make myself clear finally?" Dr. Barnes gives both boys a glare that would make Burt Hummel proud.

"My, my mental state?" Noah knows that his mental state is completely fucked up but he would never do anything to hurt his child.

"Everything you have gone through in the last few months Mr. Puckerman is more than most adult men could deal with let alone a teenager. I know that you are experiencing great mental anguish right now but you have to put the child first." The doctor changes his voice to a more soothing tone.

"I am moving you to a house that the government rented so that I am with you at all times until you are able to go back to school at which time you will be under complete surveillance. Your mother and evidently the rest of your posse will be living in the house too. I have successfully delivered several male pregnancies and I am not allowing you to screw up my record. I am not going to let you lose this baby on my watch. I have read your file and I know the circumstances regarding how you became pregnant and I also heard from Dr. Joe Lopez that you wanted to keep the baby, to work through all the emotional and mental baggage that comes with this pregnancy in particular. I am counting on that fact Mr. Puckerman, that you still want this baby. Am I correct in my assumption?"

"Y-Yes! I don't want to lose this baby! I love her! And Beth! Finn you still want both of us don't you?' Noah searches his boyfriend's face for any sign of doubt.

"I love you Noah, both of you. I don't want to lose her either. Please listen to the doctor, he knows his stuff." Finn reaches over and kisses the dry chapped lips.

"Now that is settled I am going to go over your routine for the next few days here at the hospital and at your new home. You need to listen very carefully to me and once I have explained everything to you I am going to do an ultra sound so that you may see your daughter." The short doctor begins to list the limitations and how everyone must work together to ensure the safety of both father and child.

Once the doctor was finished he left the room and allowed the boys to have a moment of privacy.

"Kiss me Finn, please. Really kiss me. I need to know that everything is going to be okay. Please?" Noah, for once in his life really listened as the doctor spoke. He knows that the chances of him losing the baby were still greater than the chances of her survival.

"Noah, you aren't suppose to get excited like that." Frankenteen tries to joke with him. It doesn't seem to help as he watches the dark eyes begin to tear up. So he does the only thing he can think of, he kisses Noah as passionately as possible without physically harming him.

The kiss is slow and deliberate. Finn's lips suckling the plump lower lip until he feels Noah's rough tongue seeking entrance. He takes total charge of the kiss sliding his tongue inside the warm orifice mapping out every inch of Noah's willing mouth. The kiss is broken only when Dr. Barnes clears his throat as a nurse pushes the ultra sound machine into the room.

"Is that better?" Finn blushes from the tip of his toes to the roots of his unruly mop of hair.

"Mmmmhmmm." Noah nods at Finn as he grips the larger pale hand in his own. "I'm just scared Finn."

"Whatever happens babe I am going to be here for you and ET. Believe that okay?" Finn gently rests his forehead against Noah's.

"And so are we!" The rest of the Glee posse chimes in as they gather around the bed.

Both teens marvel at their friends and their commitment to them. The kind doctor simply shakes his head and helps the nurse set up the machine. Carol, Ruth, Burt and Dr. Joe join the rest of the group as the doctor begins to take the wand across the baby bump.

Carol is the first to shout "there she is!" Burt's eyes become misty at the miracle on the screen. Ruth quietly cries at the sight of her granddaughter. Brittany holds Santana tight around the waist as her best friend openly cries in front of their friends. Tina and Mercedes simply smile as their boyfriends hold their hands. Artie and Dave are speechless as they watch the little alien looking embryo shape and eyes come into focus more.

"Finn she is beautiful. Our baby girl is going to make it. We are going to be a family." The mohawked teen's voice is barely a whisper.

Finn looks around the room at the strange group of people and at how much love each one has for the others. "We have always been a family babe, just now we have one of our own." He kisses Noah's forehead before the adults pull him into a full on group hug.

Outside in the hallway….

An _orderly_ attempts to enter the room but is turned away by an undercover federal agent. His phony name is not listed on the paper by the door. But he has seen enough. Noah Puckerman was pregnant and now all he had to do was wait until the baby was born and then he would have the family he had always dreamed about with the man of his dreams. With an evil smile he slowly walks to the elevator. There was no way he was going to lose the one thing that ensured his future with his boyfriend, Noah's baby. His baby, not that idiot Finn's.


	17. Pot Roast, Mashed Potatoes, and a Bullet

Please review and let me know what you think. Hemmy

Chapter 17

Pot Roast, Mashed Potatoes and a Bullet

Dr. Barnes had never had any children of his own. He had primarily brought children into this world and left them with their parents only keeping an observational eye on them as they grew up. He never had to deal with children; their unique language, life styles, or anything else kid related for that matter. He simply brought them into the world and watched them from a distance. Until the day he got called into the Puckerman situation.

Now his whole life was one jumbled up mess. He didn't understand half of what these unruly brats said or did in his presence. One in particular drove him to insanity, Brittany the bubble head blonde cheerleader. He could never understand what she was saying or if she herself even knew what she was talking about.

Their ringleader most of the time was one Santana Lopez. She was a true spitfire when it came to keeping order among the ranks. Out spoken and loud yet she possessed a chink in tough exterior. A certain Jewish teen who was pregnant and upstairs. Everyone in the house knew of her weakness yet not one of the other kids called her out on it.

Mercedes was next in command. She had been against the two young parents from the beginning but now she was like a lioness protecting her cub. There was tension at first between her and the rest of the group, but it quickly ebbed after spending time with Noah one on one and learning more about his personal life.

The wheelchair kid, Artie was by far the smartest one to have an intelligent conversation with. Yet he was seldom seen without the dancing Barbie doll sitting in his lap. But on those rare occasions he was without his hip attachment he was a worthy chess opponent.

Dancing brought to mind the 'Square Chang'. What the hell kind of name is that for a couple. I mean couldn't they have been a little more creative with that name. He had heard Puckleberry, Quick, Finnchel, Klaine. Why did they have to nickname their couples anyway? Who was going to remember them a year from now?

He knew the answers to those questions, those crazy brats would remember to their dying days who each couple was, Dr. Barnes knew that beyond a shadow of a doubt. Except maybe the blonde hip attachment, sometimes she forgot where the backdoor was or how to get to the house after school.

Every kid was different. Every couple different. And it showed in everyday life.

Dinner was a horrible collaboration in the evenings. Everyone wanted something different and they all thought they were wonderful cooks. His stomach rolls at the thought of any more casserole surprises waiting for him in the kitchen. I mean really, which ever one thought it was okay to just add the cake mix to the lasagna so they didn't have to cook two separate dishes was just plain wrong and didn't need to be anywhere near a cooking stove or pantry. It was a disgusting mess but some of the boys ate it anyway.

The parents were the saving grace on most nights bringing either Chinese takeout or pizza for everyone to eat. At least he didn't have to worry about food poisoning those evenings. And Burt was the male company he needed since many of his agents were too busy playing runway with the girls or COD with the boys. It seemed his once tight ship was now full of leaks and in danger of sinking.

The one bright spot he relished in at night was the soft words and actions of Finn and Noah. Finn was the most protective of the group outside of Dave. And truth be told he often wondered if Dave and Noah didn't have something just as special as Finn and Noah.

Dave was there to hold the angst ridden father when he was having self doubts about the whole baby situation. The larger teen never faltered in his support or his openness of loving the Mohawked teen. It made Dr. Barnes wondered if Finn was entirely okay with the closeness they shared or if he felt jealous of their relationship.

But those thoughts would flitter away as soon as Noah's eyes would light up the moment Finn walked in the room or the way Noah's hand always found a way of touching the Frankenteen as the others referred to him. During nightly rounds, Finn could be found gingerly holding his boyfriend in the mist of all the pillows cocooned around the fragile teenage father.

The emotional support system for Noah Puckerman was f'd up but it worked for everyone. And that was all that mattered to the brilliant doctor as he had to listen to another song being belted out by any one of the teens or a dance routine was being taught to his agents. It would all be worth it if he could keep both father and child safe.

Finn was tracing patterns in the palm of Noah's hand when he caught the doctor staring at them. Simply shrugging at the intrusion he goes back to telling Noah about how their lives were going to be after the baby was born. The plans he wanted to make. A life he wanted to create with the sleeping father and unborn child.

"How's our patient doing tonight?" The quiet words seem to pull Finn out of his day dream.

"He said he was hungry but then he fell asleep. Mom said she was bringing his favorite home cooked meal tonight. Pot roast with Mashed Potatoes and gravy. But I don't think I'm gonna wake him up though." Finn brushes his fingers lightly through the dark hair.

"He needs to eat but let him wake up on his own. I'll make sure the others save a plate for him. And I plan on thanking your mother and step father for being a life preserver in all of this." The doctor smiles kindly at the youth. "And if you're not down, I will make sure they save you a plate too."

"Thanks Doc. For everything you know. You saved them. I just wanted to say thanks, cause my mom said she hadn't heard me say that to you. And I mean it. I love Noah and the baby." Finn blushes as he pulls the dark hand to his smiling lips.

"We still aren't out of the woods yet Finn. We still have a few more months to go before I will breathe easy. Just keep doing what you have been and the rest of your motley crew have been doing. As long as you all help to take care of him, his chances in crease everyday." The doctor reaches out and squeezes the broad shoulder as the front door is opened and the smell of good food

Finn laughs softly as the doctor literally runs out of the room to answer the door.

Noah wakes to a softly laughing Finn. "What is so funny Hudson?"

"I think we have finally broke the baby doctor. He ran out of here the moment he smelled Mom's home cooking." Finn gently kisses his life mate. "She made your favorites, pot roast and mashed potaotes."

"Really?" Hazel brown and green eyes look questioningly at Frankenteen. "So what are you waiting on? Go get us some!"

"He's going to save me a plate." Finn smiles broadly at Noah.

"What about me? The one eating for two? Forget about me already?" Noah pouts.

"Don't worry Noah you know my Mom will make sure we both get fed. " Finn laces his fingers with Noah's holding the smaller hand gently.

"Did you ever think you and I would be here? Talking about having a baby. Living in this house? I'm gonna have a baby. A little person that is going to depend on us. A little person is growing inside of me." He looks at Finn with a goofy smile.

Frankenteen begins to stroke the baby bump that is becoming more predominate. He smiles at the way the tanned jock leans into his touch as he is babbling about being pregnant. In truth Finn loves to hear the excitement and happiness in his boyfriend's voice.

"I looked at some baby stuff online today. I had to ask Tina why a table needs to change for a baby. She told me that it you laid the baby on it to change it's diapers. Why do we need a specific table to change the baby? Why cant we just use the kitchen table? Or my desk?" Finn looks questioningly at Noah who is starting to giggle.

"We can't use the table that everyone eats off of that's gross. And there is no way I'm doing my homework where dirty diapers have been either. We need the changing table. Maybe we can find one at one of those thrift stores for babies." Noah leans up to kiss Finn but stops. He hears voices that cause him to pause and listen. His entire face changes from carefree to one of darkness, angst. He silences Finn with a glare and a hand gesture. It can't be. It's not possible.

Finn sees the shadows of fear and horror creep across Noah's features as the voices fade in and out. His step father Burt is yelling something about a shotgun and blowing someone's ass way. Mrs. Puckerman was crying something about 'why now?' His mother was using language that made him blush_. When did Mom learn those words…._

He also hears a voice that made his skin crawl. Noah's father was downstairs demanding to see his _faggot_ son. To know if the Godforsaken rumors are true. Talking about how much money they could make if they sold the story to the movies or the press.

"Finn…It's my old man. Don't let him come up here. I don't want to see him! I hate him!" Noah begins to shake. His father had been a mean drunk and would beat him and his mother for no other reason than they made too much noise or looked at him wrong.

Noah's body told the stories of abuse if you looked close enough at it. The thin lines around his eyes, the thin lines that were barely visible on the backs of his legs and back. The emotional ones were imbedded on his soul from the abuse of his drunken father.

Finn remembers the black leather belt with the Metallica buckle. He knew why Noah hated that group and the fashion accessory, he had seen the brutality it could leave behind if the elder Puckerman was drunk and pissed off at the same time. He had held Noah; even back then when they were little in elementary school after Noah was beaten with the damn thing. Those thoughts made Finn's stomach sick and his heart hurt.

"Shhhhh..Baby I'm not going to let him hurt you again. Never again. Burt's down there right now threatening to blow his sorry ass away. Dr. Barnes and the agents aren't going to let him get near you either. So just try to relax. Remember the baby and that you're not suppose to get upset." Finn wraps his arms around Noah as best he can and continues to speak softly, lovingly to shivering Jew.

Downstairs in the middle of the melee was Dr. Barnes holding a 9mm government issued firearm in the elder Puckerman's face as he calmly told the inebriated man to shut up and to listen very carefully to what he was about to say to him.

* * *

><p>"I have read your history. Always coming up with a new con or a new scheme to run. You never made an honest dollar in your life and now you come in here and start screaming about parental rights? I don't think so you worthless piece of shit! That young man up there almost died just a couple of weeks ago and you don't even ask how he is doing! All you can think or yell about is how much money they can make for you!" Dr. Phillip Barnes is past his breaking point and just explodes at the deadbeat MIA father.<p>

"You waltz in here like you own this place and you don't even consider how anyone else feels about it! That kid upstairs has been through so much because of you! The only people he has ever been able to count on are in this room with you MORON!

These kids, however imperfect or crazy they are, have been here for him. Even though they may accidentally try to kill the rest of us with their cooking or skateboards that are left on the stairs. They constantly talk about breakups or make ups, you actually need a score card to keep up with them all. Or maybe their plan is just to drive me insane with all of the singing or dancing. It doesn't really matter because _**they love and care**_ for that young man upstairs.

Ruth has been there for her son! She works herself nearly to death so Noah and Sarah have a somewhat decent home! You were never there to help her or the kids! She has never had anyone to count on except Carole and Burt! They have been there for her and the kids!

Did you ever go to one of their song and dance things? Did you ever go to one of his football games? Just hung out with him? NO! YOU! WERE! NEVER! THERE! THEY WERE!" Dr. Barnes' finger twitching near the trigger of the weapon.

"**YOU OF ALL PEOPLE HAVE NO RIGHT TO ASK LET ALONE DEMAND ANYTHING IN THIS HOUSE! YOU GAVE UP THAT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME LEFT THEM! SO LISTEN REALLY CLOSLY NOW BECAUSE MY DINNER IS GETTING COLD AND I FUCKING REALLY WANT TO EAT SOMETHING THAT I KNOW WILL NOT KILL ME! CAUSE ME TO VOMIT OR SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH!**

**IF YOU BREATHE ONE WORD OF THIS I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF! THERE IS NO PLACE ON THIS EARTH WHERE YOU CAN HIDE THAT I WILL NOT FIND YOU AND PUT A BULLET BETWEEN YOUR EYES AND OUT THE BACK OF YOUR SKULL! YOU WILL FORGET WHAT YOU KNOW AND YOU WILL DO WHAT YOU ARE BEST AT! YOU WILL WALK AWAY AND NEVER COME BACK HERE! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?"**

The room is completely still and silent other than the harsh breathing of the short doctor. The other agents are actually afraid that they may have to 'take down' their boss if he continues to flip out. Burt is beaming with pride and fear at the same time, _the doc has some balls! _The Gleeks are all open mouthed, like fish in a cartoon, with their eyes as big as saucers. Ruth is standing beside the crazed doctor slightly smiling at him, almost flirting with him. Everyone is waiting for either a yes or a gun shot that would have to be explained to the big guys in charge.

"You're crazy you know that! I will walk away today! But you can't keep me away forever! I will see the little slut and my bastard grandchild!" The elder Puckerman begins to slowly make his way to the front door as Dr. Barnes matches step for step with the graying man. The gun is still mere milimeters from Jewish man when the crimson faced doctor cocks the weapon and places his first finger on the trigger. The deadbeat reaches frantically for the door knob.

"Since you seem to be extremely hard of hearing, two of my agents will escort you to the next town and place you in a quiet place. You will be monitored every single second of every minute of the day. If you even act like you are going to cause any problems." The doctor pushes the muzzle of the gun tighter against the dark wrinkled forehead. "They will finish you. There will be no warning, just a simple piece of metal that cruises through your heart or your brain. You will cease to exist to the world and no one will miss you. NOW GET THE FUCK OUT! Murray and Harris you know what needs to be done. Report back to me."

Everyone watches as the agents step up on each side of Noah's father and begin to walk him out of the house. Dr. Barnes seems to collect himself as he looks at Carole as he holsters his weapon, "So pot roast tonight?"

Ruth Puckerman for the first time in her adult life knew what it felt like for someone to stand up for her and her children. She envelopes the mad scientist in a fierce hug, kissing his cheek and crying at the same time.

Burt Hummel was congratulating the doctor and slapping him on the back. He had never actually seen anything like this before and the rush of adrenaline was still rushing through his veins. Burt had hoped for one tiny moment that the crazed doctor would indeed '_pop a cap in the bastard's ass_'.

"Um…Yeah let's all eat before it does get cold." Carole doesn't know what else to say. She was mentally freaking out over had just happened in front of her. She had never seen anyone actually point a gun at another human being. Carole had heard about Burt's famous shot gun and she had even seen it. But she had never actually seen him point at anyone. Walking to kitchen she quietly asks Burt to check on the boys upstairs to make sure Noah was alright.

Burt stops just outside of the room listening to Finn comfort the pregnant teen. He doesn't want to disturb them or their private time but he knows that Carole will quiz him so he gently raps on the doorframe signaling his entry.

"Hey guys. Everything okay?" Burt watches as Noah tries to get up out of the bed. "Where you going bud?"

"Uh I need to use the restroom. Wash my face and I want to go downstairs to eat dinner." Noah tries to pull out of Finn's hold.

"Look I will help you into the restroom and then I will go downstairs to get our plates. You are still too weak and the baby….It's just not a good idea." Finn doesn't want Noah to see his father.

"I think it would be okay if Chubby here goes downstairs for dinner. If the doc says it's okay that is." Burt clasps both boys on their shoulders. He looks pointedly at Finn first and then Noah. "Don't worry the SOB is gone. Dr. Jeckell downstairs made sure he left and that he is never coming back."

Finn's mouth drops open and then closes before repeating the process over again. "I don't understand Burt. Who is Dr. Jeckell? And why is he in the living room? What happened with Noah's father?"

"Dr. Barnes went psycho on the bastard. Threatened to….well let's just say that he wont be back anytime soon and leave it at that, okay" Burt gives Finn that look of just let it go. He steps out into the hallway to yell downstairs at the doctor.

"So I guess we really did break the poor guy." Finn looks at Noah who is trying to lean forward in the mound of pillows. He slips his arms around and under Noah as he lifts up and out of the bed. "You can go if it's okay, but I get to carry you downstairs and back upstairs after dinner. No argument babe."

"Fine. I just want to know what happened and how the doc freaked out. I always knew he was a little different. I mean he just watches me sometimes. Doesn't say anything just watches like I am going to turn into something." Noah puts his arms around Finn's shoulders as he is lifted from the bed.

"The doc said you can come downstairs but you have to tell us if you start hurting or get tired. He doesn't want you to over exert yourself. Okay?" Burt watches as Finn carries Noah into the bathroom. "And the kids can't wait to tell you what happened down there."


	18. Chapter 18

To my fellow writers and readers:

I have recently read the memo FF issued in regards to the content of our stories and I am displeased with the verdict. I do understand the ratings system and I think that the slash, hetero, and any other type of pairing (barring animals of course, just EWWWWWWWW) that contains sexual content should be allowed on this site. They could issue a more literate warning about the mature explicit content and make it a members' only type access. But with any system they were to incorporate, you would still have people that will cause a problem no matter what. I call them trolls.

The anonymous reviewer; the person that doesn't write but can offer so many trivial or incorrect corrections to your story, some of these people are extremely cruel in their 'opinions' to the point of bullying the author. Yet they are allowed comment without prejudice.

The bored school kid that has nothing better to do; the kid that knows he/she is not over eighteen years old and on mom and dad's computer that has no restrictions. They think it's cool to read something that is _dirty, smutty_. They break the rules but we have to pay the price for it.

Some of the writers on this site write from personal experiences, you can tell by the descriptions, the attention to the details. They are drawing from a place in their own lives and for some it is a form of therapy, a form of healing for them. Whether rape, first time being intimate with someone, being abused sexually or physically, they are sharing something important with the rest of us. They should be allowed to do so without fear of revocation.

Some of us write truly dirty stuff. I know that I do and the stories that I prefer to read are like the ones that I write. I have never had a problem with my sexuality or other people's sexuality. We are all human underneath everything. We just have different views on what is acceptable as far as sex is concerned.

I checked my stories today to see if any were missing and I felt lucky that a few of them have not been pulled from the site. I sincerely hope that they don't and that they will leave everyone else alone as well.

If they do choose to begin removing our stories then I propose that we find another site that will treat us with the respect that we deserve as writers and publish what _we choose_ to write. We live in the land of the free and free speech is supposed to be protected under the constitution.

So my friends please keep the faith that we will be allowed to continue and if not there are other options. And to my readers I am currently working on all of my stories and will be updating a true chapter soon for a few of them.

As always my friends….

Peace

Hemmy the whacked out southern Squirrel


	19. The Treble Clef

Chapter 16

The Treble Clef

The Meal was a huge success and devoured quickly by the odd ensemble sitting at the end-to-end pick nick tables in the formal dining room. The laughter filled the room as the Glee kids each told their own version of the great "Dr. Billy the Kid Barnes". Each one finding something different and unique to tell Noah and Finn. Burt even commented he would never go against the good Doctor in a gunfight.

Noah Puckerman watched as his weary mother turned from having the weight of the world on her shoulders to a giggling, flirting teenager before his very eyes. It seemed his mother was developing a crush on the pistol-packing healer. A deep feeling of pride filled the dark Jew as he just smiled at Ruth knowing that she needed Barnes just as much as he needed Finn.

After the dishes were done and the kids were all in their collective rooms of the house for bed it became almost like the old Walton's television show as a round of goodnights could be heard until Dr. Barnes yelled out "Good night John boy, Mary Ellen, GrandMa and everyone else!" The kids found it to be hilarious and the onslaught of giggles was confirmation to that.

"You know Billy; they don't have any idea what you're talking about right? None of those kids watched that prehistoric stuff." Burt Hummel gently prods the smiling doctor.

"Yeah I know but it will give them something else to talk about besides me and my pistol packing ways." The small doctor smiles at Burt as he squeezes Ruth's smaller hand.

"I didn't know such a kind man could be so dangerous and exciting!" Ruth's voice soft yet filled with admiration. She was beginning to fall for the rough and tumble doctor.

There is an unmistakable ring tone heard coming from Burt Hummel's pants; only the thick denim muffled Single Ladies. "Uh, excuse me that's Kurt's ring tone." Burt excuses himself from the dinner table.

After a few minutes and quiet yelling from the back porch, Burt dials a number from his cell. He needs to talk to one of Noah's protectors after the news he just received.

Dave feels his phone vibrate on the mattress beside him. He looks at the number and for a moment does not recognize it. _'Why would Burt Hummel call me' _after only a few seconds of hesitation he answers the phone call.

"Hello?" Dave's voice slightly wavers.

"Come outside. The back porch. I need to talk to you in private. Now." Burt's commands are short and to the point.

"Okay." Dave simply ends the call and heads for the back of the house.

Once outside he sees the older man leaning across the railing of the porch looking out at the night sky. He is not sure if he should be alone with Kurt's father but now he has no other choice.

Burt senses more than he sees the young football jock approach him. "Thanks for coming out like this. I need to ask you something and I do not want any lies or half-truths. Okay?"

"Sure Mr. H. What's going on?" Dave stops out of arms reach of the older man knowing that Mr. Hummel has a temper.

"I want to see that thing in your pants pocket. The thing you found in the room where Puckerman was raped at that party." The voice of Burt Hummel shows no sign of argument or contempt.

"I…I don't think you really want to see it Sir. I…I just think…" Dave tries to convince Burt it is nothing worth looking at.

"Look kid I know that we have had our differences in the past and I still feel like I should have taken a shotgun or blowtorch to your ass. However, in the last few months you have proven to me that you have changed.

Now don't screw that up and give me the key ring!" Burt's voice rising with the last sentence.

"Mr. H you really don't want me to do that. Just let it go and…" Dave tries once again to dissuade the man.

"I know that it belongs to Kurt! I saw it outside of the hospital when you and Finn were arguing out in the parking lot! Let me see the DAMN THING NOW!" Burt shouts at the taller teen while holding his hand out.

Dave reluctantly removes the key ring from his pocket. It is a solid gold treble clef with the initials K & B engraved on the back of it. He hands the object to Burt watching the graying man slump against the railing as soon as the offending piece touches the palm of his hand.

"I was there when he bought them. A set, one for him and one for Blaine. He saved up his money from working at the shop so he could buy them and not have me pay for them." The defeat showing in Burt's tired voice.

"The baby that Puckerman is carrying is my grandson. My _son_ just called me to tell me that he wants to come back to McKinley to finish out the year. He gave me some bullshit story that it is too hard at that private school. Said he needed a break from Blaine too." Burt's voice is barely audible as he just stares at the key ring. "He's supposed to be back next Monday, the same time Noah goes back to school. I do not know what to do. I just don't know what I am supposed to do."

"I promised Noah that I wouldn't say anything until he is ready and I made Finn promise too. Mr. H, Noah has to be the one to tell us. We cannot make him. The doctor said that he could lose the baby if he has too much stress." Dave gently takes the offensive object and puts it back into his pocket. "We have to give him time and we will have to deal with Kurt coming back to school. I know that it is going to be hard not saying anything but we have to do it this way."

"How do we deal with it? How am I supposed to deal with my son being a rapist? How am I supposed to keep the anger and hurt at bay until Noah says something?" Burt looks at Dave, eye to eye waiting for an answer.

"The same way Finn and I are going to do it. We will think about the baby. About your grandchild. She is our priority and so is Noah. I will say this; if Kurt tries, anything…Tries to hurt Noah in anyway. You will need your shotgun or blowtorch….Cause I am going to kill the bastard. It is not a threat Mr. H but a fact. I love Noah and I will do whatever it takes to make sure he and the baby are safe." Dave's eyes never leave Burt's and his voice never waivers.

"If Kurt tries to hurt Noah or the baby….Son you won't be the one to go after Kurt, I will." The determination and authority in Burt's voice never falters as he walks back to the door leading to house.

Dave stays outside for a little while thinking about the conversation with Burt. He knows that he needs to tell Finn that Burt knows. He also has to tell Finn and Noah that Kurt is coming back to McKinley. Dave dreads both conversations.

Burt goes back into the house and bids everyone a goodnight as he ushers Carole out of dining room. He explains that he needs to talk to her and that it would be best in private. He tells Dr. Barnes that he will call him in the morning and fill him in on the latest developments. They exit hurriedly to their truck.

Ruth and Dr. Barnes sit at the table for a little while longer. They ask either questions, personal questions trying to get to know one another better. Both feel the electricity that has been building between them. Their night ends as usual with both going to separate bedrooms.

XXX

Dave walks up to the room shared by Finn and Noah quietly entering the dark room. He finds that Finn is asleep on the pallet next to Noah's bed. He gingerly places his hand over Finn's mouth as he shakes the tall teen awake.

"MMFHH" The muffled sounds from Finn's covered mouth barely make Noah shift in his bed of pillows. Finn thrashes for just a moment before his eyes come into focus on Dave's face inches from his own. He watches as Dave motions for him to follow him outside of the room. Glancing at Noah who is still sleeping he makes his way towards the doorway.

"What the hell Dude! You scared the shit out of me!" Finn exclaims quietly once he is outside of the doorway,

"We need to talk Hudson. Come outside with me. No one else needs to hear our conversation." Dave's voice is stern as he walks toward the staircase.

Finn follows Dave out the front door of the house, past the guards to the street. They are illuminated only the dim street lamp.

"Okay so what the fuck man? You come into our room all ninja like, scare the hell out of me so we can come outside? What the hell is going on Karofsky?!" Finn demands of the bigger jock.

"I talked to Mr. H earlier. He told me that Kurt is coming back to McKinley on Monday. The same Monday that Noah goes back to school." Dave looks at Finn while his hand plays with the key ring in his pocket. "And I don't think it is a coincidence either."

"Burt told you this? Why? What the fuck is the reason Kurt's coming back?" Finn is flabbergasted by the information.

"It seems that Burt overheard our conversation at the hospital when Noah was beaten up. He knows what we know!" Dave takes a deep breath before he continues. "Kurt called him tonight with some BS about that Prep school being too hard and something to do with Blaine. He does not believe it. Hell I don't believe it!"

"So he knows that Kurt did this? And he is okay with it?" Finn pales at the thought of Burt being okay with all this crap.

"No he's not okay with it Dumbass! It's tearing him up inside!" Dave throws his hands up in the air, exasperated at how the conversation is going,

wanting to strangle the taller teen. "I told him that if Kurt tries to hurt either Noah or the baby that I would…That I would _handle it_. He told me that _HE_ would handle Kurt if he tried to go after them! So no, I do not think he is okay with it! However, he has no choice right now! None of us do until Noah names his rapist!"

"Why the fuck is this happening now?! Why did he choose to come back to school now? Does he know about the baby? Is he going to try to take the baby away? WHAT THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSE TO DO?!" Finn yells at the lumberjack teen who's face is showing every emotion.

"Finn we are just going to take it one day at a time! That is all we can do! We keep this between ourselves and pray that Noah will not have a breakdown when we tell him about Kurt. We cannot afford for him to be having a meltdown! Not now, he is doing so well!" Dave's fear showing through to his voice.

"So how do we tell him that Kurt is coming back? How do we tell him that his rapist is going to be in the same school as him? He will have to face him everyday! How do we handle that?" Finn's questions are like knives to both boys hearts.

"We will tell him in the morning when Burt tell s the Doc. We have to be there for him and keep him calm. Maybe the Doc can give him something to help keep him from freaking out." Dave tries to be the reasonable one even though his mind is totally freaking out.

"Okay. But we cannot tell Santana what is going on. She will go all 'Lima Heights' and Noah doesn't need that right now." Finn looks at Dave for agreement.

"Yeah and plus she will tear us apart for not telling her from the start." Dave knows what the Latina is capable of, as he had witnessed it first hand. "We need to get back inside before she comes looking for us and we wont be able to lie our way out of this one. She will know that we are up to something."

"I need to check on Noah and think about all this too." Finn turns to walk back inside his mind a jumbled mess. "See ya in the morning."

Dave watches as Finn walks back up the walkway towards the house. He turns his face towards the sky saying a silent prayer that all this will be over soon. That everything will work out for the two teens that deserve so much better than all this mess. He stays there for a while just letting his own mind deal with everything before heading back inside to his own place in one of the bedrooms.

XXXX

The next morning does not go quite as expected with Noah. Finn and Dave were both ready for the explosive meltdown that never happened. Noah simply nodded at the two teens and began to eat his breakfast.

Finn was going to explode at the lack of response from his boyfriend. It seemed to him that Noah was avoiding the situation. Dave just stared off into space as he tried to remember all the things he read about rape victims. Yet he could not remember anything that would indicate Noah would block out who did that to him.

Finn's mouth finally got the better of his brain. "Why aren't you freaking out? Why aren't you screaming or crying? Noah talk to me!"

"Have you lost your mind Finn? Why would I be upset that Hummel is coming back to school?" Noah looked at Finn with dark curiosity clearly written on his face.

"Maybe because of what…" Dave cut off Finn.

"Finn shut the hell up! Don't do this man!" Dave growls loudly at the freaked out teen.

"Don't do what? What the hell is going on with the two of you?" Noah looks from one teen to the other and then it hits him like a ton of bricks. He drops the spoon; it makes a clattering sound, as it hit is the bowl of cereal he had been eating.

"Why can't you just admit who raped you? Why can't you just tell us what Kurt did to you?" Finn has tears pricking at his eyes threatening to spill over. "Why can't you just tell us?"

"God dammit Finn!" Dave is close to losing his temper and pounding Finn's mouth shut. "Stop it! Don't make him do something he isn't ready to do!"

"Both of you shut the hell up! I know who raped me! It was not Kurt! I do not know why the two of you think you know who did it. I am the only one who really knows what happened that night! It was not Kurt! It was…" Noah starts sobbing holding on to his bulging stomach. "It doesn't matter! I do not want to think about it! I do not want to remember it! Just leave me alone! Both of you LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Noah tries to walk away but he stumbles slightly. Both teens try to help only to have Noah push them away. They watched helplessly as he called for Thompson to help him back to bed. The agent let the dark teen try to walk away and then picked him up bridal style carrying him back to his room.

Dave takes that opportunity to slam Finn into the wall. The force of the slam making the wall shake from the impact. "What the hell Finn! Why the hell couldn't you keep your mouth shut?!"

Finn struggles in Dave's grasp, "He needs to face what is coming! He needs to understand that Kurt is going to be around him!"

"Didn't you just hear what Noah said? It was not Kurt! And that leaves only one other person that it could be!" Dave says through gritted teeth as he kept Finn pinned to the wall. "It was Anderson! Kurt's boyfriend!"

Neither boy noticed the pistol packing Doctor that had just came in the back door making a dash for the stairs. "The two of you go nowhere! I will be back down after I check on my patient!" The Doctor yells at the two struggling teens.

"_What in the blue hell could they have done now? " _Dr. Barnes knows that both boys love the father to be but they could be obnoxious as hell! At least with Satan, Noah never became upset.

Dr. Barnes arrived in Noah's room to find the troubled teen sitting in the window dormer looking out at the morning sky. He looks at Agent Thompson who mouths '_its bad'_ to the Doctor before leaving the oversized bedroom.

"I don't wanna talk." The scratchy voice is barely above a whisper as Doctor Barnes approaches Noah. "I just want to be left alone."

"I will leave you alone one I check on you and the baby. If you want to talk to me then you can but otherwise I am just here to make sure you are both okay." Dr. Barnes tells Noah as he begins to check the dark teen's blood pressure with the cuff.

"Why can't they just leave me alone? I know who did this to me! I know _**why**_ he did this to me!" Noah tries to take deep breaths to calm his emotions. "They want me to name him. To tell them who it is. But I can't! I don't want to ever say his name! I DON'T EVER WANT TO SEE HIM AGAIN!"

Doctor Barnes looks at the BP reading and while it is a little high, it is not too serious. "Noah I know that both of those …I know that they mean well in their own way…But pushing you is not good. You need to come to terms with what happened to you and learn how to not blame yourself. What happened to you was not your fault in any way!"

"YES IT IS! This happened to me because I was such bully to someone! I treated him as if he was my own personal punching bag! I used to slushy him everyday at school! I would shove him into lockers! I threw him into the dumpsters!" Noah looks into the blue green eyes of the kind Doctor. "All this is MY FAULT!"

"You _**were**_ a bully. _**Past tense! **_I have heard the other kids talk about how much you have changed and about all the times that you have protected them!" The good doctor sees that he is not getting through to the distraught father. "Noah…Did you ever try to force him to do anything sexual with you?"

"Oh God! NO! I never liked Kurt that way! I have always loved Finn! I never tried to….to do what happened to me! I wasn't that type of a monster!" The broken teen is on the verge of having a full-blown melt down in front of the doctor.

"Then you did not deserve this Noah! No one deserves what happened to you! You are not any type of monster! You are just a young man trying to figure out what is right and what isn't!" The Doctor has never the comforting sort but he feels a fierce intensity to protect this man-child. He pulls the shaking youth into his arms. "The one that did this to you is the monster not you Noah. Never you."

They stay like that for a few more minutes. The usually gruff doctor holding the normally tough teen until his tears are empty. Both are learning more than they ever thought possible from each other.

"I am going to call Ms. Pillsbury for you. I think you need to talk to someone and I know that your therapist is out of the office until tomorrow." Dr. Barnes tells Noah as he loosens his hold to look at the jock face to face. " And if you breathe a word of this little 'nice' session I will make sure you are confined to bed for the rest of your pregnancy."

"Thank you Doc. I do not know what my Ma or I would have done without you. And if you tell anyone I said that I will….I don't know what but I will think of something." Noah smiles a small simple thing to most but to the Doc it was like winning a prize.

"Okay then we are in agreement. This little girly session over. Now I want you to get back into the bed if you feel like you need to or you can stay up for a short while." Doctor Barnes calls Agent Thompson back into the bedroom. "Thompson I know you like playing COD and other mindless games for the PC. Your orders for the next couple of hours is make sure Noah forgets about the outside world and gets lost playing that trivial game. Understand?"

"Uh…Yes Sir! But are you sure Sir? I mean I am suppose to be protecting him, not…" Thompson's excuse is cut short.

"Yes I am sure! I did not stutter did I?" The Doctor raises an arched eyebrow at the faltering Agent.

"You heard the Doc. Set up the game and be prepared to die!" Noah laughs at the expressions on both men's faces as he smiles broadly at them.

The lean Doctor walks out of the room to go deal with the two downstairs that seem to create havoc where there is none. Shaking his head, he begins his descent down the stairs.


	20. Two Little Maids and One Heart Full

Chapter 17

Two Little Maids and One Heart Full of Pain

Sue Sylvester prided herself on paying attention to the small details. It was what kept her alive all these years. She loved her older sister Jean and had taken care of her the only way she knew how and that was to protect her from life's ugly truths. So how had she missed an important piece of this sick and twisted puzzle called Noah Puckerman?

She had spent the last two hours watching all the video surveillance of Puckerman's locker and she could not believe that she hadn't paid any more attention to the two people that kept slipping pieces of paper into the Mohawk'd jock's locker. She reached for her phone and dialed the ginger's extension.

"Everest we need to talk in my office now!" After barking at Emma Sue hung up the phone and waited for the neurotic counselor to show up.

After about ten minutes Emma Pillsbury walked into the Coach's office. Her face was a mixture of contempt and worry. 'What is it Sue? I thought we were past name calling and yet you summon me here without using my real name!"

"Calm down Emma. I just knew it would make you arrive quicker if I pissed you off somewhat. We have a problem. One that I should have seen coming since the first time the Glee club rioted about Frankenteen and Puckerman." Sue waits for Emma to sit down before turning her laptop around so that the ginger could see exactly what she was talking about.

"Do you remember why I put the camera in the locker across from Puckerman's?" She watches Emma nod her head affirmatively before continuing. "It was to find out who was putting the notes in his locker. And then bullshit with the jocks happened, I guess we all thought it was Azmio that had put _all _the notes in there. "She watches Emma's face contort trying to understand where all this is going.

"Well I just spent the last two hours watching all the video. The meathead only put _one_ note in the locker. But as you can see two other people put small white pieces of paper in there too. Only I didn't pay any attention to them. I guess I had a momentary lapse in judgment." She watches as the quiet woman begins to turn red in the face, the small pale hands twisting themselves. "We thought it was his rapist that kept tormenting or Azimio and…"

"It was those two little….What the hell is wrong with those….girls?!" Emma is shocked to see Rachel Berry and Quinn Fabray putting notes into Noah's locker. It seemed as if the girls took turns every other day. "Why would they do this to someone that was/is their friend?"

"Past tense is correct Emma. I don't think either girl really understands the meaning of the word friendship. They only think of themselves remember?" Sue hates the taste that is in her mouth at the thought of how much terror the two girls created for the father to be. "I just don't know how to handle this situation. I know what I want to do to them! But they are still considered children and I would go to jail myself if I publicly flogged them or worse. It's too bad that we can't cane the two insensitive idiots."

"I think we should call them out on what they have done. I just don't know how yet. And yes while I agree that caning would be an option if we lived in Thailand it isn't here in the US." Emma knows that Sue is not totally serious about physically hurting the girls but she agrees with the sentiment behind the words. The girls need to learn a lesson from this, one that they will remember for the rest of their lives.

"Well I think it's time we put our heads together and come up with a plan Emma. Are you game?" Sue arches her brow at the red head.

"Yes! Between the two of us Sue I know we can figure this out." Emma has a small mischievous smile on her pink lips.

Becky bursts through the door startling the two adult women. She looks like she is going to explode. "Coach! Coach! I really need to talk to you! In private!" The words are punctuated with Becky's hands on her hips.

"Becky whatever it is it will have to wait. I am working with Emily Post here on a secret project." Sue smiles warmly at the young Cheerio. She loves Becky almost as much as she loves her sister Jean.

"It can't wait Coach! It's really important!" Becky taps her foot for dramatic effect.

"Becky it's okay. Just tell me what has your pom poms in a twist." Sue looks at the young girl.

"I was in Principal Figgins office when I heard that Kurt Hummel is coming back! He will be here next Monday!" Becky knew Coach Sylvester would want to know the information. "His father was talking to Figgins about transferring his information from that private school back to here."

"Are you sure Becky?" Emma asks the grinning girl.

"I may not be normal to you but I'm not deaf!" Becky glares at the counselor.

"Becky Miss Pillsbury didn't mean it that way. It is just a surprise to us that's all. Thank you for delivering that tidbit of news." Sue looks at Emma. "I think this just might help us in our plan."

After reminding Becky that she did not want to be late for her next class and that she needed to talk with their sworn enemy, Sue waits for the young girl to leave the office. She turns to Emma with one burning question, "What do you have in mind? " The two adult women sit and talk in the cheerleading Coach's office until they are interrupted by Burt Hummel knocking at the door.

"Sue. Miss Pillsbury. I need to talk to both of you if you have a couple of minutes." Burt asks as he sticks his head in the door.

"We just heard the news about Kurt. I wondered how long it would take you to come by or call me." Sue stares at the balding man.

"Yeah I got the call last night. And I also think we need to talk about the fallout that is about to happen." Burt scratches the back of his head. "I know who raped Noah and…"

"When did he tell you? He told me that he wasn't ready, that he would never be ready." Emma is shocked to her very core that Noah would name his rapist after all the talks she had with the young jock.

"Who is the son of a bitch? I will make sure that they share a cell with an old enemy of mine that would love to make him their bitch!" Sue snarls at Burt.

"HE didn't tell me. Karofsky found something that belonged to the rapist the night it happened. He has held on to it since then waiting for Puckerman to name the guy." Burt takes a deep breath and continues. "I saw it the day Noah was attacked here at school and I made Karofsky show it to me last night. I was there when the item was purchased, I was with Kurt." The last words are choked as bile begins to creep up the distraught father's throat. "My own son is a rapist."

"What the hell? Porcelain is the rapist?" Sue is dumbstruck.

"Um, Mr. Hummel. I don't know what you saw but it wasn't Kurt. Noah told me who….It wasn't Kurt." Emma shakes her red head negatively at the man staring open mouthed at her.

"You know who raped Mohawk? Why didn't you tell me?! I thought we were working together!" Sue stares in disbelief at the ginger.

"Emma I know what I saw and Dave said that Noah freaks out every time he sees the key chain! And I agree with Sue! Why didn't you tell us that you knew who did this?!" Burt is wrestling with some many emotions.

"I can't divulge information that a student tells me in confidence. You both know that! But it was definitely not Kurt!" Emma grips her hands tightly together. "The person is connected to Kurt. That's all that I can say!"

Burt Hummel doesn't know whether or not to be excited that it wasn't Kurt or if he needs to be terrified of whom the rapist is, either way it is not going to bode well with Kurt. _If it wasn't Kurt then it was…Blaine! Kurt's boyfriend! What the hell is going on?! _Burt's mind is whirling with the information as he sits down in the only vacant chair that is left in Sue's office.

"Burt. Burt!" Sue raises her voice on the second try at getting Burt's attention. "Do you know who it is? Cause if you do….I need to know!" Sue looks straight in to the clear eyes of a tired father.

"It was Blaine." Burt scrubs his face with his hand. "Kurt bought two matching key chains. One for Blaine and one for himself. Their initials are engraved on the back of each one." Burt looks up at the cheerleading Coach and then to Emma. "I saw the ring last night and I just knew it was Kurt that did this heinous thing! I doubted my own son!" Burt mentally kicks himself for think that his son could do something so horrid to another person.

"The Warbler from Dalton? Are you sure? I mean the kid is too nice and polite." Sue shakes her head at the thought. "You know what it doesn't matter at this point. It doesn't matter until Noah is ready to tell what/who happened that night. If we confront him he could lose the baby and none of us want that extra baggage for the kid."

"I agree with Sue. Burt we have to keep this quiet for Noah's sake and the baby's." Emma looks at Burt with big doe eyes.

"But what am…How am I suppose to deal with the fact that my son is dating a rapist?" Burt moves his ball cap further back on his head scratching his tired scalp. "I mean…what if Blaine comes to my house? How am I supposed to act? I just can't ignore the fact that he raped the brat and he could rape my son! My God! When did this get so fucked up?" Burt sinks down in the chair that is next to Emma.

"Burt I wish I had an answer for you. I really do." Sue knows that Burt is raging a battle in his own mind. If it was Jean the bastard wouldn't be alive or at the very least he would never be able to rape anyone again.

"We still keep everything from Kurt. I know that you are afraid Burt but until something happens or Noah decides to name his attacker, we simply wait and hope for the best outcome." Emma places her hand over Burt's arm offering a small amount of comfort.

"We have some more news too Burt." Sue hopes that changing the subject will ease some of the torment that is currently happening in the balding man's mind. "We know who has been putting the _notes_ in Puckerman's locker."

Burt jerks his head up and stares straight at Sue. "I thought the bastard that had his buddies attack Noah in the locker room…I thought he did it."

"He put one single note in there. The rest were put in there by none other than Quinn Fabray and Rachel Berry." Sue motions at the computer screen. "Azimio kept saying that he only put one note in the locker so I decided to check out his story and see if I had missed anything that could point to who actually…raped Noah." The word rape left Sue's mouth as bile rose up in her throat. She tries to swallow it back down but ends up having to take a drink of water to help push it.

"They are Kurt's friends! I thought they were all friends! What the hell is going on with these kids?!" Burt places a hand over his heart feeling it begin to beat too fast.

"Burt are you okay?" Emma places her hand gently on his shoulder. "Burt breathe slowly and calm down. The last thing your family needs right now is for you to have a heart attack."

"I'm….okay. I just don't understand how these kids can be so cruel to each other. To their own _friends_. I know back in the day we could be assholes but this goes beyond even what we did." Burt slows his breathing with the exercises the doctor and therapist taught him.

"I'VE GOT IT!" Sue yells out. Her mind had just finished formulating a plan of revenge for the two girls. "Sorry about that but I just had a wonderful idea and if you will excuse me I need to check on a few things before I reveal it." The formidable Coach stands from her office chair. "You guys can stay here as long as you like, but this is something that I need to do."

Emma and Burt both nod at the wickedly smiling Coach as they watch her leave. They stay in the teacher's office until Emma is comfortable with Burt driving to his shop.

Sorry for the cliff hanger but it is necessary for the plot bunnies to figure out the plan of holy terror for the girls. I have the main ideas of Sue's plan but writing it out is going to be a bit tricky. Please review and let me know if you have any ideas as they are always welcome! Peace Hemmy


	21. Desperation and Regret

_This is to all the Blaine fans: Please do not bash or criticize because you favorite character is being shown in a less than favorable light. I honestly never meant for Blaine to be the bad guy but…..and we are not at the end of our story yet either. There are more twists and turns to come before the whole truth about that night is spoken from all three boys._

_This entire chapter is based on Blaine and the angst of the crime. I know it probably should have been written in a different format but I write as my muse speaks. So please read and review…..Peace Hemmy_

Desperation and Regret

Chapter 18

"So how easy was it to convince Kurt to go back to McKinley?" A dark figure asks Blaine as he sits down at the local coffee shop.

"It was easier than I thought it would be. He knows that something is going on with that douche bag Puckerman and his curiosity is getting the better of him. He just _has_ to find out why his father and Finn have been so secretive about the whole thing." Blaine's hand's fidget with the latte in front of him. He has begun to hate himself for everything that is going on, the guilt of what he did weighing heavily on his shoulders. "Plus I reminded him of how much he missed wearing his designer clothes and the fact that he really did miss his father."

"Well it wont take the nosy little shit long to find out all the information we need." Sebastian smiles at Blaine as if they were talking about Lady Gaga's latest single.

"Don't call my boyfriend that! He has no idea what is really going on and I have no idea how he's going to react to my being the father of Puckerman's baby!" Blaine tries to keep his voice down but his emotions are running to high for him to maintain control.

"Don't start yelling! We have almost everything we could ever want! Don't blow it now!" Sebastian glares at Blaine.

"Why do you keep saying we? This is not a threesome! This involves only myself and Kurt. And the baby of course." Blaine looks at Sebastian with heated glare. "You are not a part of the big picture! You are not a part of my relationship with Kurt! You are nothing more than a friend! If I can really call you that!"

"This debacle as you keep referring to it, does include me! I am the reason you have kept your act together and not fallen apart! I am the reason you know all the information that you know about Puckerman and what he did to Kurt!" Sebastian points his well manicured finger at Blaine's face. "And I could be the reason YOU lose it all!"

Blaine knew Sebastian was capable of doing whatever it took to win. Whatever it took to have whatever he wanted. In that moment of realization, Blaine understood that Sebastian would use the rape to destroy him and his happy life with Kurt. Unless he found a way to silence the manipulating bastard. For the first time since this all began Blaine found himself very afraid.

"Now that I have your attention once again. Have you heard anything from the two little twit bitches? Have they said anymore about what the gossip is at McKinley?" Sebastian quirks an eyebrow at Blaine.

"Uh, no. The last thing I heard Quinn say was that she had a surprise planned for Puckerman when he returns to school. And before you ask, she didn't elaborate on what she has planned for him. She just had this evil look in her eyes. " Blaine pauses long enough to take a sip of his now cooling coffee.

"We have to figure out a way to stop her. We cant allow her to hurt the baby. Our plan needs to go without a hitch." Sebastian stares into his own coffee thinking what the stupid little bitch could have planned for the juvenile delinquent.

"Kurt has no idea. But he said that she could be dangerous if she chose to be." Blaine knows Quinn's reputation and how she loved to 'take someone down' and yes she could be extremely dangerous.

"Well I have to go back to class. Ugh! If only the Physics professor actually knew how to teach the damn class. I will see you later this afternoon. Don't forget the Warblers have practice at six." Sebastian states before leaving the father to be alone in the coffee shop.

'_How can he enjoy what is happening to me? To Puckerman? It's almost as if he gets off on it somehow. The smug way he talks about the baby, my baby. The plans that he is making. How does he think he fits in to my life with Kurt? It's almost as if he thinks he and I are going to raise the baby! _

_I should never have done it. I should never have gone to the party! I should never have listened to Sebastian! He wouldn't stop telling me about all the things that Puckerman did to Kurt! How he wouldn't take no for an answer! How he touched Kurt. How he tormented Kurt! Oh God! The alcohol only intensified my hatred of Puckerman! It made me want to hurt him the way HE hurt Kurt!_

_But now I have a baby on the way! My child is growing inside of that…that bastards body! I'm not ready to be a father! I have dreams! I have things I want to do with my life! How could I have been so stupid?! What the hell am I going to do? How am I ever going to be out from under Sebastian's thumb? Why did I let my life slip from my control?'_

Blaine has no idea that tears are quietly slipping down his cheeks. He is lost in thought as Carole Hummel stops at his table.

"Blaine honey what is wrong?" Carole softly pats his shoulder as she sits down at the table beside him.

Jerking his head up Blaine stares into the older woman's soft eyes. It almost breaks what little resolve he has left. "Nothing Mrs. Hummel. Just a long day and Kurt's going back to McKinley. I guess I am just a little emotional right now." He offers her a small fake smile as he wipes away the traitorous tears.

"Burt told me last night. What is really going on Blaine? You know you can talk to me. I wont pick a side with you or Kurt." Carole is trying her best to understand, like Burt, why Kurt was choosing now to come back to McKinley.

"Kurt's used to being the center of attention and at Dalton he's not. He thinks that I get all the attention. He misses the way he stood out, was different than everyone else. And he misses Burt." Blaine offers the story he had perfected when Kurt told him he wanted to go back home. "I, uh, need to get back to school. It was nice to see you Mrs. Hummel."

"I think there is more to it than that, but its up to you to talk about it. Just know that I am here if you need someone to talk to. Who knows maybe Kurt will change his mind." Carole offers an understanding smile as she leaves the table.

Blaine stands and walks out the door to his car.

_Why did I have to see her?! She has never been anything but kind to me! And there I was lying to her! I want to tell her the truth! The whole nasty sordid truth! Just open up and let it all go! But she would hate me! She would never understand why I did what I did! She would call the cops! I would go to jail! I would never see my child! I would never see Kurt again! _

_Kurt would leave me! No matter that I was paying Puckerman back for doing the same thing to him! He would leave me! He would hate me! I would lose everything! The man I love and the child we will raise together! Oh God! I am so fucked up! My life is totally fucked over!_

Blaine pulls himself together as he starts his car and heads back to school. He knows that he can't allow anyone to see him fall apart, especially Sebastian. The bastard would use it to his advantage.

Classes are a blur for the normally energetic Warbler as the day ends with a lecture on the large eyeball found in the Tampa Florida area. The scientists are refusing to try and identify it until tests can be completed.

Blaine could swear on Broadway that the damn eye kept staring at him. It was almost as if it could talk. The thing wanting to tell the story, the macabre tale. He can see his secret being told in that one eye.

What he did to Noah. What it felt like to be inside the terrified jock. The power he could feel and the absolute terror that radiated off the frozen jock. A half smile grimace flickered across his face knowing that he did make Puckerman his bitch that night.

The images change quickly as Blaine reaching for the baby and muffles a scream as his baby begins to melt away. It is so real to Blaine that he jumps from his seat in the auditorium. He doesn't care who is watching him as he runs from the large room.

He runs until his short legs refuses to carry him any farther. The air in his lungs feels like fire lapping all the way up his throat. Sickness wells in the pit of his stomach. Blaine stumbles pitching his body forward on to the hard ground. The impact from the fall triggers a gut wrenching bout of nausea and a new batch of tears.

He pulls himself to his knees and retches for what feels like forever. The tears blur his vision and he makes no attempt to wipe his face. He finally comes to his senses after a dog begins to bark continuously at him.

The scenery in front of his clearing eyes shows an open field, a small cluster of houses, and a small pond. Blaine stands and begins to walk to the edge of the water wiping away at his tear stained face.

Everything had changed in the last few months. He and Kurt were no longer as close as they once were. Blaine thought of the secrets that now between him and Kurt. The rape. The baby. Using the girls to torment Puckerman. The lies. The half truths that burned deeper into his soul each time he was near Kurt. Every time he thinks of what he did to Puckerman a little bit more of his soul is lost. _**I am no better than him!**_

He would try and make out with Kurt but the shy Diva would turn away. Kurt would literally get up and start doing something else if the dapper Warbler tried more than just light kissing. He tried to be so patient, to make sure Kurt understood that he would never intentionally hurt him. Nothing worked and Blaine being a teenager with needs he talked with some of the older Warblers. No one had an answer.

But Blaine found his answer from unlikely person, Sebastian. The newest Warbler had become somewhat friends with Kurt and claimed that he knew why Kurt refused to be intimate. Before Sebastian would spill the beans as he put it, Blaine had to first swear to never repeat anything he was about to say in that it would only hurt Kurt more in his fragile state. After an hour and a half of listening to Sebastian explain why; Blaine was on the verge of losing his dinner.

After a large amount of whiskey, tears and subtle goading from Sebastian to teach the bullying asshole a lesson. Blaine couldn't remember driving to the Lopez residence or how he found the passed out Puckerman lying across the bed. He could remember how he jerked the belt free from around the unconscious teen and roughly worked the pants down below Puck's ass cheeks.

The power he felt as he roughly shoved his saliva coated dick into the tight hole. Total domination! Total control! The feel of the body underneath his going completely frozen as he thrust his entire length inside the passage way. It chased away any pain that his own body feeling. He rode his victim's body for what felt like hours but he knew it must have only been a few minutes. The sound of his own voice as he 'told' Puckerman that he was his bitch, that he could _do this to him any time he wanted to _and_ he would not be able to stop it_.

He felt adulation and terror at the same time. The primal instinct to protect what is his and the to the extent in which he chose to act. How simple it had been to just take what he thought was payment for Puckerman's crimes. He had never committed any crimes, never even wished the bullies at the Sadie Hawkin's Dance such an extreme end. All the wrong reasons to feel satisfied that he had committed rape.

But the rush, the empowerment, the control. To have control over someone else's life. To have the power to end that life. The feelings inside left him wanting more and that was what terrified him. To simply twist Puckerman's neck and his miserable life would be over.

Revulsion began to seep in to Blaine's train of thought as he continued walking. Black and cold fear invaded inch of the short body. He never thought he would want to kill someone let alone know how 'good' it would feel.

He never even noticed that he was now almost waist deep in the pond. He wondered how long it would take for someone to find his body out here. How long before anyone even noticed that he was missing, that he had run from his class like a mad man?

Blaine knew the answer and it made him shiver even harder than the cold pond water. Sebastian…..


	22. The Lesser of Two Evils

Control. Absolute Power. Once you have tasted them/it, a consuming fire burns deep in the pit of your stomach. The fire aches just below the surface aching for more. Waiting….The monster is always waiting…Hemmy

Chapter 19

The Lesser of Two Evils

Kurt wished he found it harder to lie to his father but since the bullying began several years ago it had become second nature to him. He had tried to tell the truth to his father but he just couldn't. The truth would get Blaine either blown in half or burned at the stake. And he was already set up to leave Dalton and now Blaine behind. He would return to McKinley and pretend that nothing ever happened with Blaine. That Blaine Anderson…was over.

A single tear slowly seeps down Kurt's cheek as he remembers the way the evening had started out so beautifully with a romantic dinner and then a movie. The way they held hands as they walked from the small French restaurant to the local movie theater.

The movie was a bust but they managed to snuggle their way through it. Lots of nose rubbing, hand holding, and sweet boy kisses made it easier to deal with the Kung Fu movie.

The ride back to Dalton was equally as romantic. Blaine had presented him with a deep red rose and the promise of an exciting future together. They had talked of NYADA and how their lives would be different, faster more hectic, but Kurt was looking forward to the New York lifestyle. They held hands as they walked up the stairs at the Academy. Everything was great until Blaine closed the dorm room door.

The make out session had started out slow and warm. Blaine gently holding his face, eyes fluttering close as soft lips encased his own tender lips. Kurt let his hands wander over Blaine's strong muscular back pulling him closer.

Everything was good, wonderful until Kurt felt the motion of Blaine laying him down on his dorm bed, then the panic began to seep into Kurt. He tried to contain it, to let the mood continue. But the moment he felt Blaine's hand on the button of his expensive designer jeans he began to struggle.

"Blaine. Stop please." Kurt began in between kisses trying to turn his head away. "Blaine you know I'm not ready for this part. We agreed to wait until we both are ready. Blaine!"

"SHHH. It's alright Kurt. You're going to be leaving tomorrow. Let's make tonight special. I will make it good for you. Just lay back and relax." The curly haired crooner said as he began to bite Kurt's neck as his hand began to rub Kurt's semi hard member before popping the button to Kurt's pants.

Kurt began to struggle harder before realizing that it was turning Blaine on even more by the apparent hard bulge in his boyfriend's pressed Dockers. He could feel his boyfriend's teeth and lips; biting, sucking a deep bruise on the side of his neck.

Terror gripped the young soprano as he realized that both his hands were being held above his head by one of Blaine's hands while the other was roaming his side and curve of his taut ass, but his feet and legs for the most part were free.

Kurt's mind seems to snap at the reality of what was about to happen to him and he begins to fight back with a vengeance befitting a true Diva.

_**THIS CANT BE HAPPENING! NOT LIKE THIS! ITS MY VIRGINITY! MY FIRST TIME! HE DOESN'T HAVE THE RIGHT TO TAKE THIS FROM ME! NO ONE DOES! **_

Kurt locks and twists his legs so that Blaine was now laying flat of his back. The quick and abruptness of the move gave Kurt the momentum that he needed to free his hands.

The first cracking punch that landed on Blaine's face was out of fear, the second was from a rage Kurt had never felt until now. "I said NO!" Kurt jerked up from his position on the bed as the tears began to spill down his cheeks. "YOU NEED TO LEAVE NOW!" Kurt's voice was low and steady betraying the total freak out his mind was having.

Blaine still reeling from the punches to his face began to apologize and grovel. "Kurt I'm so sorry! I don't know what got into me! Please forgive me! I just… got carried away! You know how much I love you and I want you just as much!"

Kurt didn't want to listen to anything Blaine had to say. He just wanted him out of the room, out of his sight! "Just get out Blaine! I need for you to leave now!" He walks to the door and opens it slightly. "Just get out."

He could remember Blaine begging him to listen to him, to give him another chance as he closed the door and locked it twice. He slid down the door letting the tears fall from his Azure eyes. His heart was being ripped in two.

By morning Kurt was ready to leave Dalton and Blaine behind for good. He packed his SUV with as much of the boxes as he could before he father arrived later to finish loading up the rest of his stuff in Burt's truck. Blaine had tried unsuccessfully to talk with him but each time Kurt had made certain that other people were around. Until he was ready to talk about what happened, he made sure that he was never alone with his boyfriend, if he could still call him that.

Kurt had begun noticing changes in his boyfriend since the arrival of the one and only _Sebastian, _the ever present third wheel in their relationship. Sebastian had wanted to know _**everything **_about McKinley and the group of kids known as the Gleeks. He seemed the most interested in knowing how Kurt was bullied at the public school.

There were so many adjectives to describe the little rodent; slimly(he made you want to wash your hands after shaking his), stalkerish(he seemed to be everywhere he and Blaine would go), creepy(he would watch everyone around him, like he was making mental notes of each person).

The little troll even went as far as to become friends with Quinn and Rachel. He had overheard conversations between the quartet in the dark corners of Dalton's library. Tidbits of information of how the whole dynamic of New Generations had and was still changing back at McKinley. It seemed that an unlikely alliance had occurred between Quinn and Rachel as an end result to the Glee Club disbanding over something to do with Puck, Finn, Karofsky, and Santana.

He could never hear the entire story as the little slimy troll would/could somehow sense is nearby presence and change the subject quickly. All that he could put together was that whatever was going on it was making Sebastian quite happy and that worried Kurt.

It seemed to Kurt that he was jumping from the frying pan into the fire as both sets of friends had their own personal issues and really didn't need his added to their burden. But he just couldn't stay here and feel safe any longer. And at McKinley there would be no Sebastian, just Dave Karofsky.

At least with Dave, Kurt knew it was out of fear/lust that fueled that fateful day in the locker room. He was afraid of being killed, not the horrendous act of rape. Dave was too far into denial of what he truly was and how he truly felt about being gay at that moment in time.

Blaine was a totally different story. He thought that Blaine loved him, understood him. How many times had his boyfriend told him he would wait until they were _**both **_ready? How many times had Blaine soothed his fears about waiting, to make their first time memorable? Kurt hugged himself tightly as more memories came to the forefront of his mind.

He seemed to enjoy the way Kurt struggled against him. The way he became more aggressive when Kurt began to beg for him to stop. To physically have to push the one person that you can and willingly trust with your heart and body away from you; frightened Kurt beyond his wildest imagination.

In the span of less than twenty minutes Blaine had damaged the way Kurt thought and felt about the curly haired boy. Not that it mattered now. Now there was only fear in his heart for Blaine.

Kurt kept his act together around his father keeping up the façade of why he wanted to come home. Asking the normal questions and giving the normal replies to his father's questions. The basic questions only for both Hummel men. Neither one pressed the other for any more communication, until Blaine showed up with a bouquet of white lilies and half of his face swollen with dark bruises covering almost the entire left side of Blaine's face.

Burt was the first to even acknowledge the broken _**looking**_ teen. The battered face meant something, it meant something had happened and Burt was going to find out what it was.

In less than one second flat Kurt watched as his father went from practically stoic to vivid vein pounding red alert status. His father's body language changed dramatically as did his facial features, the vein throbbing on the older man's forehead. All those things signaled a meltdown to Kurt, a meltdown that his father could not handle in his son's opinion.

"Blaine I thought we said our goodbyes last night?" Kurt tries to direct the conversation in a one way direction. He keeps his body language neutral so that Burt doesn't react to the already volatile situation.

"I just wanted to say I love you and will miss you Kurt." Blaine hands the large bouquet to the slightly taller teen. "PM me tonight on FaceBook _please_." He turns to walk away before one final gesture, "_Be Safe Kurt_", there is a hint of sadness to the youth's bloodshot eyes.

Kurt simply takes the flowers offered to him and walks back towards the truck where his father is looking murderously at the retreating form. "Let it go Dad. It's over now and will never happen again." Kurt says to his father as he stops at a garbage can just before reaching the tailgate of the new Ford and drops the lilies into the can.

" I seem to be doing that a lot lately. First for the brat and now for you." Burt was shaking his head as he looked away from his son. "The sad thing is, it's never over. Not for any of us."

"I don't understand Dad, the brat?…" Kurt looks to the older Hummel for an explanation but receives none as Burt closes the tailgate of his truck and motions Kurt towards the loaded Navigator.

"At this point no one does in this scared and fucked up mess. " Burt scratches his balding head hoping that Kurt would let it go. "You asked me to let it go and I am asking for the same in return. Just let this go Kurt."

Kurt nodded at his father understanding that whatever was troubling was very bad. He watches as his father checks the straps holding the boxes and luggage down in the bed of the truck before climbing into his own Navigator. The drive home is one of the longest in Kurt's life.


	23. my fellow readers

This for all my readers

I am now back and I have several chapters that I am proofing for my stories. I have never stopped writing them. My life has had several issues with my health and other private stuff. But to those that have pm'd me my stories are not up for adoption. They are my creation, my heart and my soul. Alot of my life is threaded into each one. A memory from my past. A thought of my future. I will be posting soon and to be quite frank and honest, the death of Cory hit a part of my past that I will be writing about also. So be prepared with the hankies when I post that one.

Peace my friends

Hemmy 


	24. Who do you Love?

_Sorry for the long delay. I had health issues and other personal issues to deal with. This chapter has a very important moment in it. The rest will follow soon. The death of Cory also delayed my writing as it kept seeping into what I was writing and its not part of the plan. Take care my friends and please review. Also will be updating my others :)_

_Who Do You Love_

After playing a couple of hours of COD, Noah is startled out of his semi trance. Agent Thompson is saying something and it isn't about the game.

"You know you need to make a choice of which one you really want to be with." Thompson says without looking away from the screen as Noah falters enough for a kill shot.

"Wha…What are you talking about?" Noah sets the controller down on the bed. A look of confusion is clearly written on the dark face. "What choice?"

"Which guy do you really want to be with." Thompson places his controller on the chest by the bed. "You have two guys down stairs that would die for you but only one of them needs to be that person in your life."

"Finn is my boyfriend. I love him with all my heart." Noah doesn't like where the line of questioning is headed nor does he like the way his own heart feels at the moment.

"Are you sure about that? Cause it seems that Dave takes more liberties than Finn does where you are concerned. He is always in the middle of your business and I know that Finn doesn't like it." Thompson pushes gently.

"He is just trying to help me. Finn understands that I need both of them and Santana too." Noah is squirming under the agent's intent gaze.

"Look kid I know that you need your friends around you, but the one person that you should need more than anyone else is the one that holds your total heart and if that over grown Frankenteen doesn't then you need to tell him before you destroy his heart all the way."

"…" Noah huffs and tries to cross his arms across his chest but the bump stops him. The little one inside kicks gently.

"It is something that you need to think about Noah. Both of the boys downstairs love you. A blind man could sense it. But you need to pick one and to tell the other to back away for a while so that the two of you can have some _privacy and intimacy_." Thompson sees Noah's expression pale slightly. "I am not talking about making out or sex. But the _intimacy_ between two people, a couple, is something that is not supposed to be shared by anyone else."

Noah relaxes just a bit as the agent tells him he is going downstairs for a few minutes to check on the other agents. The tanned jock knows that Thompson is giving him time to think about what he just said. He simply nods as the older man leaves the room. His little girl gently kicks him again.

"Yeah I know baby girl, I can be a total jerkwad sometimes. I just…I am afraid of the answers to the questions. I know that doesn't make sense to you but…" Noah's mind begins to whirl as jumbled thoughts bounce around inside his brain.

_Everything had been so fucked up since the….hell he still couldn't say the simple four letter word without wanting to scream…RAPE.. _

_He had been raped and if he listened to everyone else including his therapist, it wasn't his fault. But he still felt like it was and until he could actually lay blame to the rapist it would always feel like it was his fault. _

_Finn never blamed him, but he felt like Finn was only there because of it…that if it had never happened to him then Finn would never have admitted to loving him…Finn had been the only person in his life that had been a constant besides his mother and sister.._

_When Finn had his arms around him the world melted away, the noise stopped inside of his head. He could feel the love and see it too every time he looked Finn in those beautiful eyes. So why did it feel good when Dave held him too…God he was so fucked up….But Dave made him feel safe and protected without the thoughts of 'will he leave me'…Noah just couldn't really return the same feelings._

_Noah knew the agent was right that he allowed Dave too much control and way too much influence on him…Yet he was afraid of pushing away someone that made him feel…wanted…He knew that Dave had been secretly crushing on him for a while. He had caught Dave looking at him with those soft eyes…And he never saw repulsion in those eyes either._

_But I am not in love with Dave! I don't think I could ever love Dave the way I love Finn. Not completely…._

_Aw hell maybe I should just send everyone away….All of them, including Finn. They all need a break from the drama I have brought into their lives. But I need all of them. Don't I? _

_What if I send them all away and they forget about me? What if it makes them angry that I sent them away? Would they still be there for me? Would they turn their backs on me?_

Noah looks at the controller on the bed in front of him. He drops his head at the thoughts the young agent cause to roam freely in his mind. The way Finn cared for him after the rape. The way he treated Finn back then….God that makes it seems like it was years ago, when it was just a few months ago. He knows that he has put Finn through the fire and yet the young man stays with him.

He remembers that day in Burt Hummel's kitchen. The weight of the knife, the steel tip of the blade, and most of all the look of complete horror, despair, FEAR. Finn's beautiful green/blue eyes showed more than his words ever could and that caused a physical pain to tear through Noah's heart at the memory.

The look he saw so many times since then when it came to the subject of Dave. Yes he had stuck up for Dave many, many times when Finn wanted to exclude the larger jock in _private_ conversations. The realization hit Noah hard as another pain ripped at his heart.

_Oh my God! All those times…All that hurt and the big lug still stays with me! _

Noah lays there for a while thinking about what Agent Thompson said about Finn and Dave. He knew that the truth but he didn't want to let go of anyone. He needed each one of them in a different way. Each person gave him strength, courage, and love.

The girls provided him with the nurturing side. The comfort each one gave was never lost on Noah. The soft touches, the gentleness. The loving looks from each gave him hope.

Santana was the mother hen and the rest were minions. If she started off in English and ended in Spanish it wasn't a good sign for anyone in her path. She even threatened him on more than one occasion when he tried to do too much too soon. Yet he saw her loving side every night when she checked in on him before going either home or to her 'own' room in the house. She always kissed his cheek and speaking gently against his skin words of love and encouragement before leaving the room.

Brittany was just Britt Britt. She would tell him stories of her fat tom cat, Lord Tubbington. She would _sneak _him bottles of juice since he wasn't allowed any junk food or soda. Her mother told her that juice was like a treat because it tasted so sweet. The blonde teen would bring a different stuffed animal each time she went home. He had quite the duck and unicorn collection going in the corner.

Mercedes understood about his beliefs being important. They often had discussions about religion and how Noah wanted the baby to know both worlds. Noah would often say, 'It would be her choice what spiritual beliefs were'. They both believed in the power of prayer and the healing of the soul.

Tina would join in their discussions some days as she was raised by a Buddhist father and a Jewish mother. Her beliefs were blended without causing an uproar in her home life. Noah found he really enjoyed talking with Tina about Gothic stuff like vampires and werewolves as well as religion.

They were always checking on him. They made sure that he was eating, that his homework was finished, Brittany even asked him if he bathed until Satan scolded her in Spanish saying that was Finn's job to handle.

The boys provided the protection and security he needed at this time. Yes he had the finest government agents and the worlds best doctor taking care of him, but it didn't hold a candle to the feeling his friends provided when he was feeling down or upset.

Mike, Sam, and Artie were his gaming buds. If he was having a bad day they would have a tournament to see who could beat the Great Puckasurus but they would end up telling stories from grade school and what was happening in the school. They just hung out with him. No mushy girly crap for them. Brohood was far beyond friendship, it was the ties that would bind them until each one's time is over.

Finn was everything to him yet the doubts were still there in the back of his mind. Always waiting, always rearing their ugly heads. He _knew_ that Finn loved him but at night sometimes when he could hear Finn snoring he still wondered if all of this had never happened would Finn still feel the same way. Would he make his feelings known? Would Finn have beat him to a pulp if he had told him he loved him before any of this had happened? He was so afraid of the answers that he never brought up any of those thoughts, not even to the head doctor.

With Dave there was no fear, only a battle scarred past of turbulence.

Noah had caught Dave watching him one afternoon in the boys locker room. It didn't repulse him. For just a few brief moments Noah fantasized about it being Finn that was watching. He had never cum so hard in his life as he did that afternoon. He felt more embarrassed that he jerked off that quickly than he did about being that bold in the open shower area.

Dave would have reciprocated the feelings without hesitation. He would never have been anything but supportive and loving. They would have been the baddest of the badasses walking down the halls. Yet he still remembered their rocky past as well but even then there was something underlying all the teen angst.

If anyone had ever kept a scorecard in the many fights that were started from Kindergarten to last year they would have seen a pattern in their fights and individual styles. They would try and beat the total shit out of each other one on one. Yet in all of this animosity they still had each other's back in a free for all. It was almost as if it was okay to fight between themselves but outsiders were not welcomed in their brawls.

Noah knew he _could _love Dave the same way the over sized jock loved him, it would take time but it was there. But he loved Finn. It felt natural. He don't have to try to make it happen.

Even back then he knew who he loved but the question that still haunts his heart, he knew he had to answer once and for all. He didn't realize the tears that were running down his face until he heard Finn yell for the doctor.

"Wha…Finn what's wrong?"

"Noah, babe, don't worry the doctor will be here soon. Where are you hurting?" Finn wipes the tears from the cinnamon cheeks.

"I'm alright. I'm not hurting cause of the baby." Noah looks away from Finn. He's still not ready to hear the answers. "It's my heart."

"Noah you're starting to scare me. Please look at me and tell me what is wrong." Finn places both of his hands on either cheek trying to turn his boyfriend's face towards his own.

"I just…I hate these damn hormones! I don't want to do this right now but I have to know! Finn I HAVE TO KNOW!" Noah practically yells at the love of his life.

"Noah you need to calm down baby. I don't know what's going on, but you need to calm down!" Finn tries to be forceful at the end of his plea. As he stands to go grab Dr. Barnes Noah clings to his hand.

"Finn I want to go see the shrink, I need to talk to her and to you. To both of you. I want her to be there." Dark hazel eyes stare pleading in to a sea of green, the dark storm brewing could be seen even if Finn was blind as a bat.

"Baby what is wrong? Please Noah talk to me." Finn holds Noah's hand.

"Finn I want no I need to see the shrink. Please call her and see if we can both come in. I need this Finn. I NEED THIS!" Tears were falling again down dusky cheeks dripping off on to the dark blue tee.

Finn fumbles with his jean pocket for his phone when Dr. Barnes walks into the room talking on his cell phone.

"Yes Dr. Crompton I think it is necessary. Good I will see you in twenty minutes." The good doctor closes his phone and looks at the angst ridden teens.

"Agent Thompson told me about the conversation the two of you had Noah so I called your _'shrink' _and asked that she come here instead of trying to take you out today." The wizard of medicine spoke directly to Noah. "I know that being a teenager is hard, difficult even, but being a pregnant teen makes everything twice as hard. You have hormones that are raging through your body causing your brain to overload which causes you to be a crying mess at times. So I am going to clear the house when Cheryl gets here so that the **TWO** of you can have _**privacy and intimacy**_**.**" There is a small smile and a slight wink from the pistol packing doc as he exit's the room.

Finn stares after the doctor wondering what episode of whatever soap opera he just woke up in the middle of. The cloud of confusion slowly dissipates as he realizes the baby is okay but Noah's not. Something is wrong with Noah, the thought scares Finn. He knows the last couple of sessions with the shrink were difficult for his boyfriend and to be honest it had been really hard for him too.

"Babe, just let me hold you until the head doc gets here." He gently shushes Noah as he goes to speak. "Shhh….Just wait until she gets here. It will be alright, Noe. Everything is going to be all right."

The lanky teen stretches out beside Noah cradling the pregnant teen as best he could since the dark jock was trying to crawl into his lap. Finn closes his eyes letting his mind comprehend what was going to happen in just under thirty minutes.

The last session with Dr. Cheryl had caused Finn to disappear for a couple of hours that day. Finally admitting that he had been in love with Noah since they started middle school. The fear, the revulsion, the inescapable love he felt for the man in his arms. His love for Noah had caused him to almost be a total homophobe.

Yeah he accepted Kurt, but only on the surface. He could not completely accept the only openly gay kid at school. Kurt was out and proud. That type of courage was not something that Finn possessed and didn't think he would until he accepted that he loved another man.

And yeah he still had doubts about this whole thing. Wouldn't you? I mean….He's having a baby and I agreed to raise her as mine. We live in a town that will rip us apart when we go public and we will have to as soon as the baby is born. Our only other option is to move away. And that means giving up our family or friends. Everything that we have every known is in this town. Our support system is here.

Yet holding Noe like this all of that disappears. In my arms is the most beautiful creature I have ever seen. The way his dark eyes sparkle when he is happy or about to do something one of us will regret later. When we kiss the world melts away to just the two of us, unless Dave is there.

The guy is okay. Under different circumstances….Naw, even if I just met him on the sidewalk I still don't think I would like him or want him as a friend. He barges in to our room whenever he feels like it. He always has an answer for everything. And and…..Okay I am so jealous of what they have between them. It's like Noah cant say no to the jerk.

I just want to be able to hold him. To cuddle. Yes I said cuddle. Just me and him. Me stealing kisses from those pouty lips. Feeling his body against mine, baby bump and all. Planning our not so bright future. But that never seems to happen cause Dave seems to be able to sense when we are trying to be alone. I just want to scream, to say get the fuck out of our lives for just a little while.

Finn is brought out of his thoughts by the knocking on their door, "Finn, Noah Cheryl is here" Agent Hightower calls gently through the door, "me and Thompson are going to be outside on the front porch and Dr. Barnes, Mr. Hummel will be on the back porch if you need anything".

After a couple minutes a softer tapping is heard by both teens as the door gently opens to Dr. Crompton's soft voice announces her presence in the room.

Next chapter will be up soon. HEmmy


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